DR. DANIEL AMEN: IT'S PUBLIC KNOWLEDGE
THAT I'VE BEEN MILEY CYRUS' DOCTOR FOR 13 YEARS,
14 YEARS NOW.
I LOVE HER SO MUCH.
JUSTIN BIEBER'S DOCTOR.
WHOLE.
THEIR COMMON THOUGHT WHEN THEY FIRST COME TO SEE ME,
I AM NOT ENOUGH.
WHAT'S THE OUTCOME OF BELIEVING I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH?
REBECCA LAMB WEISS: YOU DON'T LIVE UP TO YOUR DESTINY.
DR. AMEN: IF YOU DON'T DISCIPLINE YOUR MIND,
IT WILL HURT YOU.
REBECCA LAMB WEISS: ALL RIGHT.
WELL, WELCOME BACK TO THE PODCAST.
I'M WITH SOMEONE THAT I HAVE SO MUCH RESPECT FOR,
GUYS, AND I CANNOT WAIT FOR YOU TO HEAR THIS.
YOU NEED TO PAY ATTENTION BECAUSE WE HAVE DR. AMEN HERE.
THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE.
DR. AMEN: WOW, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR HAVING ME
AND SPREADING THE WORD ABOUT BRAIN HEALTH.
REBECCA: I THINK IT'S SO IMPORTANT
BECAUSE I THINK PEOPLE ARE TALKING ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH,
AND WE'RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT THAT MORE THAN EVER,
BUT I FEEL LIKE THERE'S A LOT OF,
WITH THAT MOVEMENT, IT'S GOING IN A DIRECTION
THAT I THINK CAN BE MORE HURTFUL TO PEOPLE THAN HELPFUL,
SO I THINK YOU'RE BRINGING A PERSPECTIVE THAT'S SO HELPFUL.
SO CAN YOU TALK ABOUT THE DIFFERENCE,
HOW MENTAL HEALTH VERSUS BRAIN HEALTH?
DR. AMEN: SO MORE MONEY FOR MENTAL HEALTH,
THE WAY IT'S CURRENTLY PRACTICED,
IS GOING TO PERPETUATE THE PROBLEM.
WHEN YOU THINK OF IT AS MENTAL HEALTH,
WHAT HAPPENS TODAY IS SYMPTOMS EQUALS DIAGNOSIS
EQUALS TREATMENT.
SO IF YOU GO TELL YOUR DOCTOR YOU'RE DEPRESSED,
HE OR SHE WILL GIVE YOU A DIAGNOSIS WITH THE SAME NAME
AS YOUR SYMPTOM, YOU'RE DEPRESSED,
AND THEN GIVE YOU AN ANTIDEPRESSANT,
TYPICALLY AN SSRI, WHICH IN LARGESCALE STUDIES
WORKED NO BETTER THAN PLACEBO.
OR YOU GO, I'M ANXIOUS.
AND SO HE'LL GIVE YOU OR SHE WILL GIVE YOU
AN ANXIETY DISORDER DIAGNOSIS AND OFTEN A BENZODIAZEPINE
LIKE VALIUM OR XANAX, WHICH IS ADDICTIVE
AND INCREASES YOUR RISK OF DEMENTIA.
ONCE YOU START THOSE LITTLE THINGS,
PEOPLE DON'T STOP THEM.
OR YOU GO, WELL, I CAN'T CONCENTRATE,
AND THEY'LL GO, OH, WELL,
YOU HAVE ATTENTION DEFICIT HYPERACTIVITY DISORDER,
AND A STIMULANT,
WHICH CAN HELP PEOPLE WHO REALLY HAVE IT,
BUT CAN COMPLETELY UNBALANCE PEOPLE WHO DON'T.
OR YOU TELL THEM, OH, I'M HAVING PROBLEMS WITH SUBSTANCES,
SO THEY GIVE YOU A SUBSTANCE USE DISORDER DIAGNOSIS
AND SEND YOU TO A 12-STEP PROGRAM,
WHICH WORKS ABOUT 5% OF THE TIME.
OR THEY'LL SEND YOU TO A DRUG TREATMENT PROGRAM
THAT'S $30,000 TO $60,000 A MONTH.
OR, MY FAVORITE WAY TO DESCRIBE THIS INSANITY,
IS IF YOU HAVE TEMPORAL PROBLEMS.
IF YOU EXPLODE INTERMITTENTLY,
THERE'S A DIAGNOSTIC CATEGORY
CALLED INTERMITTENT EXPLOSIVE DISORDER.
IED.
IT'S LIKE IMPROVISED EXPLOSIVE DEVICES.
SORT OF IRONIC.
AND THEN IT'S LIKE, WELL, WHAT DO YOU DO?
WELL, ANGER MANAGEMENT CLASSES, MEDICATION.
THIS IS INSANE.
WITH NO BIOLOGICAL DATA.
AND SO WHEN WE THINK OF IT AS MENTAL HEALTH,
WE HAVE THIS WAY WE DIAGNOSE PEOPLE,
AND THEN IT'S MEDICATION.
AND SINCE PROZAC WAS RELEASED IN 1988,
DEPRESSION HAS GONE UP 400%.
WE ARE MORE DEPRESSED
THAN BEFORE THIS MEDICINE WAS RELEASED.
SO THAT'S ODD.
THE OUTCOMES IN PSYCHIATRY ARE NO BETTER THAN THEY WERE
IN THE 1950S WHEN I WAS BORN.
AND LAST YEAR, THERE WERE 340 MILLION PRESCRIPTIONS WRITTEN
FOR ANTIDEPRESSANTS.
AND SO MORE MONEY FOR MENTAL HEALTH IS MORE OF
THIS INSANITY OF MAKING DIAGNOSES
IN 10-MINUTE OFFICE VISITS,
AND 25% OF THE AMERICAN POPULATION
IS ON PHARMACEUTICALS.
AND IT'S LIKE, NO, NO. NO.
WHEN YOU THINK OF IT AS BRAIN HEALTH, WELL, ONE,
YOU HAVE TO LOOK AT THE ORGAN YOU'RE TREATING,
WHICH IS WHAT WE DO AT AMEN CLINICS.
YOU HAVE TO LOOK.
YOU HAVE TO THINK OF IT.
LIKE JUSTIN BIEBER WAS ONE OF MY PATIENTS,
AND THAT'S PUBLIC KNOWLEDGE.
I WAS IN HIS DOCUMENTARY SEASONS.
AND HE CAME INTO MY OFFICE,
AND AFTER A COUPLE OF MONTHS,
HE CAME IN AND HE SAID, I THINK I GET
WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO TELL ME.
MY BRAIN IS AN ORGAN LIKE MY HEART IS AN ORGAN.
IF YOU'D TOLD ME I HAD HEART PROBLEMS,
I'D DO EVERYTHING YOU SAID.
SO I THINK I'M GOING TO DO WHAT YOU SAY.
AND THEN HE GOT BETTER.
I HAVE HIS BRAIN NINE MONTHS APART.
TERRIBLE.
MUCH BETTER.
WHEN YOU THINK OF IT AS BRAIN HEALTH, WELL, THEN,
YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T DRINK BECAUSE ALCOHOL IS
POISONOUS TO THE BRAIN.
WHEN YOU THINK OF IT AS BRAIN HEALTH,
YOU PROBABLY SHOULDN'T BE SMOKING POT
BECAUSE MY STUDIES AND OTHER PEOPLES' STUDIES
IS IT DECREASES ACTIVITY IN THE BRAIN.
WHEN YOU THINK OF IT AS BRAIN HEALTH,
YOU HAVE TO GO TO BED EARLY,
YOU HAVE TO REALLY START THINKING ABOUT EATING BETTER
BECAUSE YOU'RE EATING FOR YOUR BRAIN.
EVERYTHING CHANGES.
AND MORE MONEY FOR BRAIN HEALTH WILL CREATE
A REVOLUTION OF GOODNESS RATHER THAN DEPENDENCE.
REBECCA: THAT'S SO GOOD.
AND SO REVOLUTIONARY BECAUSE I'VE SEEN IN SOCIETY
HOW IT'S BEEN THIS TURN TOWARDS MENTAL HEALTH,
AND THERE'S NO DISCUSSION OF PROACTIVE THINGS
YOU CAN DO TO HELP HEAL THE ORGAN OF THE BRAIN.
AND THERE'S SO MUCH THAT WE CAN DO.
AND THAT'S WHAT YOU TALK ABOUT IN THIS BOOK,
CHANGE YOUR BRAIN EVERY DAY .
YOU DON'T HAVE TO STAY STUCK WITH THE BRAIN THAT YOU HAVE.
IT CAN HEAL.
DR. AMEN: WELL, I LOVE THAT.
I LOVE THAT SO MUCH.
IT'S HOW I HIT HOME RUNS IS EVERY DAY,
YOU ARE MAKING YOUR BRAIN BETTER BY WHAT YOU DO.
OR YOU ARE MAKING YOUR BRAIN WORSE BY WHAT YOU DO.
AND I'VE WRITTEN 42 BOOKS.
AND THEN I'VE REALIZED, IT'S LIKE, WELL,
WHERE DO PEOPLE START.
AND SO I DECIDED TO WRITE MY GREATEST HITS BOOK,
WHICH ISCHANGE YOUR BRAIN EVERY DAY: 366 SHORT ESSAYS
ON THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS I'VE EVER SAID
IN SNACKABLE, ADD DELIVERY.
IT'S LIKE 3 MINUTES, READ THE PAGE AND DO THE EXERCISE.
AND YOU END UP REALLY UNDERSTANDING
TO LOVE YOUR BRAIN,
TO AVOID THINGS THAT HURT YOUR BRAIN,
AND TO DO THINGS EVERY DAY THAT HELP YOUR BRAIN.
AND I'VE DONE OVER A QUARTER OF A MILLION BRAIN SCANS
OVER THE LAST 35 YEARS,
AND I MAKE BAD BRAINS BETTER AND I MAKE GOOD BRAINS GREAT.
REBECCA: YEAH.
AND YOU KNOW BECAUSE YOU'VE DONE THIS SO MANY TIMES,
LIKE YOU SAID, YOU KNOW WHAT THESE PEOPLE
COULD BE DOING PROACTIVELY.
THIS IS WHY THIS IS SUCH AN INCREDIBLE RESOURCE
BECAUSE THERE'S THINGS THAT PEOPLE CAN BE DOING
EVERY SINGLE DAY TO CHANGE THE QUALITY OF THEIR LIFE
TO HELP HEAL THE MIND.
AND I LOVE THAT.
THE OTHER THING THAT I THINK IS SO IMPORTANT
IS WE KNOW AS BELIEVERS, BECAUSE YOU'RE A BELIEVER,
IS HOW IMPORTANT OUR BELIEFS AND HOW WE VIEW OURSELVES,
OUR IDENTITY, HOW IT AFFECTS OUR WHOLE LIFE,
AND THE BIBLE TALKS ABOUT THAT,
AS A MAN THINKS IN HIS HEART, SO SHALL HE BE.
THE THING WITH MENTAL HEALTH,
AND I SEE THIS BECAUSE I AM ON TIKTOK,
I AM ON THE SOCIAL MEDIA APPS,
SO I SEE WHAT MY GENERATION, MILLENNIAL,
GEN Z, AND ALL THESE OTHERS ARE POSTING,
AND WITH THE MENTAL HEALTH THING,
THERE'S SO MUCH OF AN IDENTITY, A LABEL.
OH, I HAVE ADHD.
OH, I HAVE ADD.
OH, I HAVE DEPRESSION.
AND THEY ALMOST TAKE IT AS LIKE APART OF THEIR IDENTITY.
HOW DAMAGING IS THAT?
DR. AMEN: WELL, I DON'T LIKE IT.
AND I ACTUALLY DON'T LIKE, IN 12-STEP PROGRAMS
THAT THEY IDENTIFY WITH BEING AN ALCOHOLIC.
I WANT YOU TO IDENTIFY WITH BEING A CHILD OF GOD.
I WANT YOU TO IDENTIFY AS SOMEONE WHO LOVES YOUR BRAIN,
WHO'S HEALTHY.
WHEN YOU IDENTIFY AS A HEALTHY PERSON,
IT'S WHAT WOULD A HEALTHY PERSON DO IN THIS SITUATION?
AND ONE OF MY FAVORITE VERSES IN THE BIBLE IS ROMANS 12:2:
BE TRANSFORMED BY THE RENEWING OF YOUR MIND.
EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT.
THEY DON'T KNOW THE SECOND PART: BE TRANSFORMED
BY THE RENEWING OF YOUR MIND AND THEN YOU CAN TEST IT
TO SEE IF IT FITS GOD'S GOOD, PERFECT, AND PLEASING WILL.
AND SO ONE OF THE THINGS I TEACH MY PATIENTS
IS TO KILL THE CANT'S.
THEY'LL AUTOMATIC NEGATIVE THOUGHTS
THAT STEAL THEIR HAPPINESS.
WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY OF UNDISCIPLINED THINKERS.
SO THINK OF THE BRAIN AS THE HARDWARE OF YOUR SOUL.
WELL, YOU STILL HAVE TO PROGRAM IT.
RIGHT.
AND YOU PROGRAM IT WITH THE THOUGHTS YOU ALLOW
INTO YOUR HEAD.
AND JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE A THOUGHT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH
WHETHER OR NOT IT'S TRUE,
WHETHER OR NOT IT'S USEFUL.
AND I LOVE IT.
SO I HAVE THIS THOUGHT.
DOES THIS THOUGHT FIT GOD'S GOOD, PERFECT,
AND PLEASING WILL?
AND SO MANY PEOPLE, JUST BECAUSE THEY HAVE A THOUGHT,
THEY ATTACH TO THE THOUGHT.
AND IT'S LIKE, YOU'RE NOT YOUR THOUGHTS, RIGHT.
YOUR THOUGHTS ARE RANDOM, THEY COME FROM THE NEWS YOU WATCH,
THE MUSIC YOU LISTEN TO,
THE VOICES IN YOUR PAST OF YOUR MOM, DAD, SIBLINGS,
FRIENDS, FOES.
AND THEY MAY NOT ACTUALLY, THEY MAY COME
FROM A DIFFERENT GENERATION,
WHICH I FIND COMPLETELY FASCINATING.
BUT WHEN YOU GET A THOUGHT, JUST QUESTION IT.
ASK YOURSELF: IS THIS THOUGHT TRUE?
REALLY?
IS IT HELPFUL?
AND IF IT'S NOT, KILL IT.
AND SO I WROTE A CHILDREN'S BOOK.
I NEED TO SEND IT TO YOU BECAUSE YOU HAVE LITTLE KIDS
CALLEDCAPTAIN SNOUT AND THE SUPERPOWER QUESTIONS .
AND THE SUPERPOWER QUESTIONS IS, IS IT TRUE?
IS IT ABSOLUTELY TRUE?
JOHN 8:32, KNOW THE TRUTH.
THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE.
REBECCA: TAKE EVERY THOUGHT CAPTIVE.
DR. AMEN: TAKE EVERY THOUGHT CAPTIVE IN PHILLIPPIANS 4:8,
THINK ON WHATEVER IS TRUE, RIGHT,
LOVELY GOOD, EXCELLENT, WORTHY OF PRAISE.
PAUL IS TELLING US THE DISCIPLINE OF THINKING,
AND THEN JUST TEST THE THOUGHT.
DOES THIS FIT GOD'S GOOD, PERFECT,
AND PLEASING WILL, WHICH IS ABUNDANT LIFE.
REBECCA: WHAT'S INTERESTING, TOO,
IS PAUL IS ALSO ALWAYS TELLING BELIEVERS TO PUT THEIR MIND,
IN COLOSSIANS 3, ON HEAVENLY THINGS.
AND SO HE'S SAYING, IT'S LIKE WE LIVE IN THIS PHYSICAL WORLD NOW,
BUT UNDERSTAND THAT CHRIST IS
SEATED AT THE RIGHT HAND OF THE FATHER
AND THAT IN CHRIST WE HAVE EVERY SPIRITUAL BLESSING.
AND SO HE'S CONSTANTLY TEACHING THE BELIEVERS,
YOU HAVE A GREAT INHERITANCE,
YOU'RE A CHILD OF GOD.
IT'S THAT LIVING BY FAITH, UNDERSTANDING IN THE MIND
TO MEDITATE ON THE PROMISES OF GOD.
THE IDENTITY OF WHO WE ARE IN CHRIST.
WHAT CHRIST DID FOR US ON THE CROSS AND HOW THAT CAN
SHIFT OUR ENTIRE VIEWPOINT AND OUR WAY OF THINKING
BECAUSE WE GO FROM VIEWING OURSELVES AS, OH,
I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH OR I'M A LOSER, I'M A THIS, BUT,
NO, IN CHRIST, I'M A WINNER.
IN CHRIST, I HAVE A PURPOSE.
IN CHRIST, I HAVE EVERY SPIRITUAL BLESSING.
AND SO I NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT THAT IN COLOSSIANS.
HE'S SAYING, PUT YOUR MIND ON THINGS ABOVE,
THINGS THAT ARE IN HEAVEN.
DON'T BE LOADED DOWN BY THE WEIGHT OF THIS WORLD,
BUT UNDERSTAND THE PROMISES THAT CHRIST HAS FOR YOU.
I NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT THAT FROM A THINKING PERSPECTIVE,
HOW HE'S EVEN INSTRUCTING US THERE.
DR. AMEN: WELL, AND WHEN YOU THINK OF
THE MOTHER TOXIC THOUGHT IS I'M NOT ENOUGH,
WHICH IS ALL ABOUT YOU.
WHERE THAT'S NOT WHERE YOUR THOUGHTS ARE THE MOST HELPFUL,
THE MOST HELPFUL THOUGHTS ARE,
HOW CAN I BE USEFUL?
WHY DID GOD PUT ME ON THE EARTH?
AND BECAUSE GOD HAS LEFT SO MANY IN THE YOUNGER GENERATION
THAT THEIR PARENTS DIDN'T TAKE THEM TO CHURCH,
DIDN'T PUT BIBLICAL PRINCIPLES INTO THEIR LIFE,
WELL, IT BECOMES ALL ABOUT ME.
AND WHEN IT'S ALL ABOUT ME, THEN I'M NOT ENOUGH.
AND PEOPLE LIVE SO MUCH IN THE GAP OF WHAT THEY DON'T HAVE
AS OPPOSED TO THE GAME,
WHICH IS HOW FAR THEY'VE COME AND HOW AWESOME THEY REALLY ARE.
WE HAVE TO TEACH KIDS HOW TO MANAGE THEIR MINDS.
I WAS 28 YEARS OLD IN MY PSYCHIATRIC RESIDENCY
AT THE WALTER REED ARMY MEDICAL CENTER IN WASHINGTON, D.C.,
WHEN ONE OF OUR TEACHERS SAID,
YOU HAVE TO TEACH YOUR PATIENTS NOT TO BELIEVE
EVERY STUPID THING THEY THINK.
IT WAS SUCH A REVELATION BECAUSE I'M 28 YEARS OLD,
I HAVE AN ADVANCED DEGREE, AND I BELIEVED EVERYTHING I THINK.
AND IT'S LIKE, NO.
THE THOUGHTS ARE JUST RANDOM
AND THEY COME FROM ALL SORTS OF PLACES.
I NEED TO TAKE THEM CAPTIVE AND GO,
DOES THIS HELP ME OR DOES THIS HURT ME?
DOES IT GET ME WHAT I WANT?
AN EXERCISE I DO WITH ALL OF MY PATIENTS
CALLED THE ONE-PAGE MIRACLE.
ON ONE PIECE OF PAPER, WRITE DOWN WHAT YOU WANT:
RELATIONSHIPS WITH YOUR HUSBAND,
WITH YOUR CHILDREN, WITH YOUR FAMILY OR FRIENDS,
YOUR MONEY, YOUR WORK, YOUR PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL,
SPIRITUAL HEALTH.
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
BECAUSE IF I TELL YOU WHAT YOU WANT,
YOU WON'T WANT THAT.
RIGHT.
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
AND THEN THE QUESTION BECOMES,
ONCE YOU DEFINE THAT, DOES IT FIT?
DOES YOUR BEHAVIOR FIT THE GOALS YOU HAVE FOR YOUR LIFE?
AND IF YOUR BRAIN IS HEALTHY,
IT'S SO MUCH EASIER TO DO WHAT FITS.
SO FOR EXAMPLE, I WANT A KIND, CARING, LOVING,
SUPPORTIVE, PASSIONATE RELATIONSHIP WITH MY WIFE.
I ALWAYS WANT THAT, BUT I DON'T ALWAYS FEEL LIKE THAT, RIGHT.
RUDE THOUGHTS SHOW UP, AND I GO, WELL, DOES IT FIT?
AND I DON'T SAY THEM.
NOW, IF I HAVE ALCOHOL -- I DON'T DRINK --
BUT IF I HAD ALCOHOL, THE RUDE THOUGHTS WOULD GET OUT.
IF I DIDN'T SLEEP, THE RUDE THOUGHTS WOULD GET OUT.
IF I HAVEN'T EATEN IN A LONG TIME AND I HAVE LOW BLOOD SUGAR,
THE RUDE THOUGHTS GET OUT.
IN FACT, I WAS LISTENING TO GENESIS YESTERDAY,
AND THIS STORY OF ESAU, ESAU AND JACOB, AND ESAU'S HUNGRY.
HE COMES BACK AND HE'S FAMISHED, AND HE'S LIKE,
PLEASE, JACOB, GIVE ME SOME FOOD.
AND JACOB, SNEAKY AS CAN BE, RIGHT,
HE'S A SNEAKY ONE.
REBECCA: SUPPLANTER.
DR. AMEN: IT'S LIKE, WELL,
SELL ME YOUR BIRTHRIGHT, AND I'LL GIVE YOU FOOD.
AND WHAT IDIOT, WHAT IDIOT WOULD GO, OKAY.
BUT LOW BLOOD SUGAR GOES WITH TROUBLED BEHAVIOR.
PEOPLE RELAPSE FROM ADDICTION WHEN THEIR BLOOD SUGAR GETS LOW.
REBECCA: REALLY?
DR. AMEN: SO JUST PROTECTING YOUR DIET
CAN HELP YOU NOT RELAPSE.
ISN'T THAT CRAZY?
REBECCA: THAT IS CRAZY.
THE OTHER THING THAT I WANTED TO ASK IS,
BECAUSE YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT TAKING THOSE THOUGHTS CAPTIVE,
HOW DO YOU INSTRUCT YOUR PATIENTS,
WHEN THEY HAVE A NEGATIVE THOUGHT,
HOW DO THEY KILL IT?
WHAT DOES THAT LOOK LIKE, PRACTICALLY?
DR. AMEN: I LOVE THIS SO MUCH.
A LOT OF MY PATIENTS, ACTUALLY,
BECOME CAN'T-HUNTERS, THAT THEY GO HUNTING
FOR THE THOUGHTS THAT BOTHER THEM.
HERE'S THE EXERCISE.
WHENEVER YOU FEEL SAD OR MAD OR NERVOUS OR OUT OF CONTROL,
WRITE DOWN WHAT YOU'RE THINKING.
AND THEN THERE ARE FIVE QUESTIONS.
DO YOU HAVE AN EXAMPLE OF A BAD THOUGHT THAT TORMENTS YOU?
REBECCA: ME?
DR. AMEN: YEAH.
REBECCA: OH, YEAH.
LIKE I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
THAT ACTUALLY, I'VE HAD THAT THOUGHT.
YEAH.
DR. AMEN: SO IT'S PUBLIC KNOWLEDGE THAT
I'VE BEEN MILEY CYRUS' DOCTOR FOR 13 YEARS, 14 YEARS NOW.
I LOVE HER SO MUCH.
JUSTIN BIEBER'S DOCTOR.
WHOLE.
THEIR COMMON THOUGHT, WHEN THEY FIRST COME TO SEE ME,
I AM NOT ENOUGH.
AND I LOOK AT HER, I'M LIKE,
IF YOU'RE NOT ENOUGH, WHO IS?
RIGHT?
AND, OKAY.
SO JUST DO THE EXERCISE WITH ME.
WE'LL ROLE PLAY.
I'M NOT ENOUGH.
I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
IS THAT TRUE?
REBECCA: NO.
[ LAUGHING ]
THEY'RE LAUGHING AT ME, MY TEAM.
DR. AMEN: OKAY.
SO LET'S SAY MAYBE.
LET'S GO MAYBE.
BECAUSE YOU HESITATED.
THE SECOND QUESTION, IS IT ABSOLUTELY TRUE,
WITH A HUNDRED PERCENT CERTAINTY,
YOU KNOW YOU ARE NOT GOOD ENOUGH?
REBECCA: NO.
DR. AMEN: OF COURSE NOT.
YOU'RE A CHILD OF GOD.
THE THIRD QUESTION.
HOW DOES THAT THOUGHT MAKE YOU FEEL?
REBECCA: SAD.
OR LIKE WORTHLESS.
DR. AMEN: HOW DOES IT MAKE YOU ACT?
REBECCA: SHUT DOWN.
DR. AMEN: OR OVERDOING, BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
THINK ABOUT IT AS A MOTHER.
WHAT'S THE OUTCOME OF BELIEVING I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH?
REBECCA: YOU DON'T LIVE UP TO YOUR DESTINY.
DR. AMEN: SUFFERING.
SO THE FOURTH QUESTION.
SO IS IT TRUE, IS IT ABSOLUTELY TRUE,
HOW DOES THE THOUGHT MAKE ME FEEL, ACT,
AND WHAT'S THE OUTCOME OF THAT THOUGHT?
SO THAT'S ONE QUESTION.
THE FOURTH QUESTION IS, HOW WOULD YOU FEEL
IF YOU DIDN'T HAVE THE THOUGHT?
IF YOU COULDN'T HAVE THE THOUGHT?
REBECCA: I WOULD FEEL FREE.
DR. AMEN: FREE.
HOW WOULD YOU ACT?
REBECCA: FREE.
[ LAUGHING ]
I WOULD LIKE I WOULD BE CONFIDENT.
YEAH.
DR. AMEN: AND WHAT'S THE OUTCOME?
PEACE.
REBECCA: MM-HM.
DR. AMEN: AND THEN THE FIFTH QUESTION,
MY FAVORITE QUESTION, IS YOU TAKE THE ORIGINAL THOUGHT
THAT BOTHERS YOU AND YOU FLIP IT TO THE OPPOSITE.
NOW, I'M NOT THE NARCISSISTIC OPPOSITE.
I AM THE BEST.
I'VE BEEN PLAYING WITH THAT THOUGHT A LITTLE BIT
BECAUSE ONE OF MY PATIENTS, MOHAMMED ALI,
USED TO SAY THAT ALL THE TIME, AND IN FACT, HE WAS.
[ LAUGHING ]
DR. AMEN: AND WE HAVE A PRESIDENT
THAT SORT OF DOES THAT.
[ LAUGHING ]
DR. AMEN: AND PERHAPS HE IS.
BUT I AM GOOD ENOUGH.
DO YOU HAVE ANY EXAMPLES WHERE THAT'S TRUE?
WHERE YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH?
REBECCA: I'M GOOD ENOUGH TO THE LORD.
I KNOW THAT.
I'M GOOD ENOUGH FOR MY HUSBAND, FOR MY KIDS.
YEAH.
DR. AMEN: AND THAT'S WHERE YOU MEDITATE.
I AM GOOD ENOUGH.
BECAUSE IF YOU DON'T DISCIPLINE YOUR MIND,
IT WILL HURT YOU.
AND WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY OF PEOPLE WITH UNDISCIPLINED MINDS.
REBECCA: OH, YEAH.
I FEEL LIKE -- THAT'S WHY I FEEL LIKE WHAT YOU'RE DOING
IS SO IMPORTANT BECAUSE I'D EVEN,
FOR MYSELF, I'VE JUST -- YOU LET YOUR THOUGHTS RUN WILD,
AND IT CAN JUST TURN INTO A DOWNWARD SPIRAL.
MY HUSBAND AND I JOKE ABOUT THAT,
HE'S SITTING OVER THERE, WHERE YOU GO ON A DOWNWARD SPIRAL,
HE'S LIKE, YOU HAVE TO PULL THE PERSON OUT,
BECAUSE IF YOU JUST LET THEM RUN RAMPANT...
DR. AMEN: WELL, I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH WILL THEN LINK TO
ANOTHER BAD THOUGHT ABOUT YOURSELF.
I'M NOT PRETTY ENOUGH, I'M NOT RICH ENOUGH,
I'M NOT TALL ENOUGH, I'M NOT SMART ENOUGH.
AND THEN THOSE NEGATIVE THOUGHTS, THEY LINK,
AND THEN THEY STACK WITH OTHER NEGATIVE THOUGHTS,
AND THEN THEY ATTACK YOU.
AND THAT'S WHEN PEOPLE WANT TO DIE.
REBECCA: YEAH.
BECAUSE THEY FEEL HOPELESS.
DR. AMEN: AND ANOTHER STRATEGY I GIVE MY PATIENTS
IS GIVING YOUR MIND A NAME.
BECAUSE WHEN YOU CAN GAIN PSYCHOLOGICAL DISTANCE
FROM THE NOISE IN YOUR HEAD,
YOU CAN EVALUATE WHETHER OR NOT IT'S USEFUL,
WHETHER OR NOT YOU TALKED TO YOUR CHILDREN THAT WAY
OR YOU'D TALK TO A FRIEND THAT WAY.
AND WHEN I HEARD THIS TECHNIQUE, LIKE,
WHAT WOULD I NAME MY MIND.
AND IT CAME TO ME ALMOST IMMEDIATELY.
HERMY.
AND HERMY WAS MY PET RACCOON WHEN I WAS 16.
I WENT TO A PET STORE TO GET MY GERMAN SHEPHERD A LEASH,
AND A BABY RACCOON CLIMBED UP THE BACK OF MY JEANS,
CLIMBED UP ONTO MY SHOULDERS,
AND WHEN I HAD HAIR, STARTED PLAYING WITH MY HAIR.
AND I GRABBED THIS THING, SHE'S SO CUTE,
I ACTUALLY DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS A GIRL
UNTIL SHE GOT PREGNANT LATER,
THE HUSSY, BUT SHE WAS A TROUBLEMAKER.
I LOVED HER, BUT SHE TP'D MY MOTHER'S BATHROOM.
AND THAT WAS SUCH A BAD DAY.
SHE ATE ALL THE FISH OUT OF MY SISTER'S AQUARIUM,
SHE LEFT RACCOON POO IN MY SHOES.
AND THAT'S MY MIND.
IT JUST STARTS OFF --
REBECCA: GOES OFF, YEAH.
DR. AMEN: TROUBLE!
AND SO I NOTICE WHEN MY MIND'S STARTING TO GET OUT OF CONTROL,
I'M LIKE, HERMY,
GOING TO PUT YOU IN THE CAGE.
AND NOW WHAT I DO, BECAUSE RACCOONS MAKE OVER 200 SOUNDS,
IN MY MIND, I JUST PUT HER ON HER BACK
AND TICKLE HER AND PLAY WITH HER
AND TREAT HER LIKE SOMEONE I LOVE,
AND IT'S ALL GOING TO BE FINE.
SO I HAD ONE PERSON NAME THEIR MIND RECENTLY TOMMY,
BECAUSE IT WAS LIKE A TOMMY GUN.
IT'S LIKE, TA TA TA TA TA .
YOU KNOW, THE NEGATIVITY.
I HAD ANOTHER ONE WHO NAMED HIS MIND ANDY,
BECAUSE HE HAD A PARROT NAMED ANDY THAT HAD EIGHT WORDS
AND SAID THE SAME EIGHT WORDS ALL THE TIME,
AND THAT WAS HIS MIND CRITICIZING HIM.
YOU DON'T HAVE TO BELIEVE EVERY STUPID THING YOU THINK.
GIVE YOUR MIND A NAME.
REBECCA: AND SO IT'S LIKE YOU DON'T ALLOW YOUR MIND
TO RUN YOUR LIFE, THAT YOU HAVE DOMINION,
AN ACT OF YOUR WILL.
YOU SAY, OKAY, I'M GOING TO PUT YOU IN THE CORNER.
AND LIKE YOU SAID TOO, YOU'RE GOING TO SHOW IT LOVE,
AND IT'S GOING TO BE OKAY.
DR. AMEN: YEAH.
THAT'S LIKE, DOES IT FIT?
DO THESE THOUGHTS FIT THE GOALS I HAVE?
IF I AM A CHILD OF GOD THAT JESUS THOUGHT WAS SO IMPORTANT
THAT HE WOULD DIE FOR MY SINS,
THAT THEY'RE WASHED AWAY, I NEED TO BE GRATEFUL FOR THEM.
REBECCA: TOTALLY.
DR. AMEN: AND I NEED TO TAKE CARE OF MY BRAIN.
RIGHT.
YOUR BODY IS A TEMPLE OF THE HOLY SPIRIT
THAT WAS GIVEN TO YOU BY GOD THAT WAS BOUGHT FOR YOU
AT A PRICE OF THE BLOOD OF JESUS CHRIST.
IT'S LIKE, MY BODY IS A TEMPLE,
MY BRAIN IS THE INNER SANCTUM.
AM I TREATING IT SO?
AM I HONORING THE GIFT GOD GAVE ME?
AND ALCOHOL'S NOT HONORING IT.
REBECCA: YEAH.
LET'S TALK.
SO THAT'S WHAT I WANT TO MOVE INTO,
IS WHAT THINGS ARE BIG NO'S.
NO-NO'S FOR THE BRAIN.
SO ALCOHOL, THERE'S NOTHING POSITIVE ABOUT IT, BASICALLY.
DR. AMEN: IT INCREASES YOUR RISK OF SEVEN DIFFERENT CANCERS.
AND THERE'S NOT A WEEK THAT HAS GONE BY IN THE LAST 45 YEARS
I'VE BEEN A PSYCHIATRIST WHERE ALCOHOL
HASN'T DONE SOMETHING AWFUL FOR ONE OF MY PATIENTS.
THAT THEY HAD AN AFFAIR, THEY SAID SOMETHING,
THEY DID SOMETHING THAT WAS DAMAGING.
ALCOHOL TAKES YOUR FRONTAL LOBES OFFLINE.
NOW, WHY IS THAT IMPORTANT?
YOUR FRONTAL LOBES ARE THE MOST HUMAN,
MOST EVOLVED PART OF THE BRAIN.
IT'S 30% OF THE HUMAN BRAIN,
11% OF THE CHIMPANZEE BRAIN,
7% OF YOUR DOG'S BRAIN, 3% OF THE CAT'S BRAIN.
ONE PERSON AT THE MOST'S BRAIN.
IT'S THE MOST HUMAN PART OF YOU.
IT'S INVOLVED IN THINGS LIKE FOCUS, FORETHOUGHT,
JUDGMENT, IMPULSE CONTROL, ORGANIZATION, PLANNING,
EMPATHY, LEARNING FROM THE MISTAKES YOU MAKE.
DON'T TAKE THEM OFFLINE.
YOUR PREFRONTAL CORTEX IS THE BREAK IN YOUR BRAIN.
YOU GET A CRAZY THOUGHT, YOUR PREFRONTAL CORTEX GOES,
DON'T SAY IT.
DON'T DO THAT.
WHEN YOU DRINK, YOU WEAKEN THE BREAK,
AND THOUGHTS GET OUT.
THOUGHTS YOU DON'T EVEN BELIEVE.
BUT THEY GET OUT BECAUSE YOU HAVE THEM.
REBECCA: SO WHAT WAS IT AS A DOCTOR?
WHAT DID YOU SEE WITH ALCOHOL THAT MADE YOU SAY,
I'M NOT DRINKING, I'M NOT PARTAKING IN THIS?
DR. AMEN: LOWER ACTIVITY OVERALL IN THE BRAIN.
PREMATURELY AGES THE BRAIN.
AND I THINK WITHIN THE NEXT TEN YEARS,
IF YOU SEE SOMEBODY WHO'S SMOKING, YOU GO, REALLY?
LIKE, REALLY?
I THINK WHEN IT COMES TO ALCOHOL,
PEOPLE ARE GOING TO GET THAT SAME, SERIOUSLY?
DON'T YOU KNOW IT INCREASES THE RISK OF SEVEN DIFFERENT CANCERS?
REBECCA: HOW BAD IT IS.
DR. AMEN: DON'T YOU KNOW YOU'RE JUST MORE LIKELY
TO SAY STUPID THINGS?
REALLY?
AND THAT'S VERY IMPORTANT, BECAUSE WHEN YOU HAVE
PEOPLE LIKE LEBRON JAMES WHO HAS HIS VODKA COMPANY, IT'S LIKE,
NO.
THESE ARE NOT THE THINGS THAT WE SHOULD SUPPORT,
IT'S THE THING THAT MAKES OUR SOCIETY SICKER AND DUMBER.
MARIJUANA.
MANY PEOPLE THINK MARIJUANA'S INNOCUOUS.
AND THAT WHOLE MOVEMENT DIDN'T HELP US ANY.
NOW, I'M NOT A FAN OF PUTTING PEOPLE WHO USE MARIJUANA
IN JAIL.
BAD USE OF RESOURCES.
BUT I THINK WE HAVE TO TEACH PEOPLE,
THIS IS NOT INNOCUOUS.
TEENAGERS WHO USE MARIJUANA INTO THEIR 20S
HAVE AN INCREASED RISK OF ANXIETY, DEPRESSION, SUICIDE,
AND PSYCHOSIS.
I'M VERY WORRIED ABOUT PSILOCYBIN,
BECAUSE EVERYBODY'S LIKE, OH, MUSHROOMS!
REBECCA: THEY'RE SO INTO IT.
DR. AMEN: DEPRESSION.
OH, LIKE LET'S LEGALIZE THEM!
AND I'M LIKE, VISITS TO EMERGENCY ROOMS
FOR PSILOCYBIN PSYCHOSIS HAS GONE UP 300%
IN THE LAST TWO YEARS.
WE NEED CAUTION.
NOW, IN CERTAIN SITUATIONS, MAY BE HELPFUL,
BUT THAT'S NOT WHAT HAPPENS IN AMERICA.
SOMEBODY GETS A BIG IDEA, AND ALL OF A SUDDEN,
MY TEENAGE -- NOT TEENAGER, SHE'S MY 21-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER,
SAYS, DAD, THEY'RE NOT DRINKING.
THEY'RE HAVING MUSHROOM PARTIES.
THAT IS DANGEROUS.
AND THEN, OF COURSE, ULTRAPROCESSED FOODS AND SUGAR
AND FOODS THAT QUICKLY TURN TO SUGAR.
IT'S A FASCINATING STUDY FROM THE MAYO CLINIC
THAT PEOPLE WHO HAVE A FAT-BASED DIET,
BECAUSE FAT'S BEEN DEMONIZED, BUT PEOPLE,
AVOCADOS, NUTS AND SEEDS, HEALTHY OILS,
HEALTHY FISH, 42% LESS RISK OF GETTING ALZHEIMER'S DISEASE.
REBECCA: WOW.
DR. AMEN: PEOPLE WHO HAVE A PROTEIN-BASED DIET,
THEY HAVE A CAVEMAN DIET, 21% LESS RISK OF GETTING
ALZHEIMER'S DISEASE.
BUT PEOPLE HAVE THE STANDARD AMERICAN DIET;
BREAD, PASTA, POTATOES, RICE, FRUIT JUICE, SUGAR
HAVE A 400% INCREASED RISK OF ALZHEIMER'S DISEASE.
YOU WANT A HEALTHY BRAIN, YOU'VE GOT TO FEED IT RIGHT.
AND YOU'VE JUST GOT TO ASK YOURSELF THIS QUESTION:
DO I LOVE THIS FOOD, AND DOES IT LOVE ME BACK?
LIKE I HAD WILD GROPER AND GREEN BEANS FOR LUNCH,
AND I LOVED IT.
AND IT LOVES ME.
BUT IF I WOULD HAVE HAD THE PASTA OR THE RICE DISH
AND THE DESSERT, NOW, I LOVE THAT,
AND IT HATES ME.
AND I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'VE EVER BEEN IN A BAD RELATIONSHIP,
BUT I HAVE, AND I'M NOT DOING IT ANYMORE.
I'M MARRIED TO MY BEST FRIEND.
AND I'M FOR CERTAIN NOT DOING IT WITH FOOD.
REBECCA: I'M ON THE SAME PAGE AS YOU.
BREAK UP THE THINGS, WITH THE THINGS THAT ARE HURTING YOU,
NOT JUST PEOPLE RELATIONSHIPS, BUT FOOD RELATIONSHIPS.
AND I DO WANT TO FOCUS ON THIS A LITTLE BIT
BECAUSE IN THE CHURCH, BECAUSE SO MANY PEOPLE WHO WATCH US
AND LISTEN TO THIS PODCAST ARE CHRISTIANS,
THERE'S NOT AS MUCH ALCOHOL,
DEFINITELY NOT AS MUCH MARIJUANA USE,
BUT SUGAR IS THE CHRISTIAN DRUG OF CHOICE.
I'M NOT TRYING TO BE MEAN BECAUSE I UNDERSTAND THAT,
I EMPATHIZE WITH THAT, BUT, FOR ME, PERSONALLY,
I'VE ALMOST -- I BASICALLY COMPLETELY CUT OUT CANE SUGAR
BECAUSE I SAW THE IMPACT.
BECAUSE I THINK WHEN YOU'RE YOUNGER,
YOU DON'T SEE IT AS MUCH, BUT AS YOU GET OLDER,
YOU SEE THE EFFECT THAT IT HAS ON YOUR HEALTH,
ON YOUR MOOD, ON YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM.
THAT WAS ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS I STOPPED DOING IT,
BECAUSE I FOUND, YEAH.
DR. AMEN: SO TWO THINGS QUICKLY WITH YOUR KIDS.
PLAY A GAME WITH THEM.
I CALLED IT CHLOE'S GAME, BECAUSE,
THAT'S MY DAUGHTER, I'M LIKE, CHLOE'S GAME.
GOOD FOR YOUR BRAIN OR BAD FOR IT?
AND IF I SAID, BLUEBERRIES, SHE WOULD GO, ARE THEY ORGANIC?
BECAUSE NON-ORGANIC BERRIES HOLD MORE PESTICIDES
THAN ALMOST ANY OF THEM, I'M LIKE, OF COURSE THEY'RE ORGANIC.
GOD'S CANDY.
I SAID, AVOCADOS.
TWO THUMBS UP, GOD'S BUTTER.
TALKING BACK TO YOUR RED-HEADED MOTHER.
OH, VERY BAD FOR THE BRAIN, TOO MUCH STRESS.
[ LAUGHING ]
DR. AMEN: SO YOU HAVE TO TEACH KIDS AND GAMEIFY IT.
DO IT WITH FUN.
AND THEN I CO-CREATED THE DANIEL PLAN OUT OF SADDLEBACK CHURCH,
AND THE REASON I DID IS I FINISHED MY BOOK,
CHANGE YOUR BRAIN, CHANGE YOUR BODY
ON A SUNDAY MORNING IN 2010,
AND I WAS SO HAPPY.
AND THEN WE WENT TO CHURCH.
AND I TOLD TANA, MY WIFE, I SAID,
DROP CHLOE OFF AT CHILDREN'S CHURCH,
I'LL GO SAVE THOSE SEATS.
AND I WALKED BY HUNDREDS OF DOUGHNUTS FOR SALE FOR CHARITY.
AND I'VE BEEN GOING TO CHURCH SINCE I WAS 4 YEARS OLD,
AND I'VE ALWAYS SEEN THE DOUGHNUTS,
BUT THAT DAY, IT JUST REALLY MADE ME ANGRY.
AND THEN I WALKED, BACON AND SAUSAGE COOKING ON THE GRILL
RIGHT NEXT DOOR, AND I'M LIKE, SERIOUSLY?
BAD FAT, FILLED WITH POISON.
BEFORE I WALKED IN THE SANCTUARY,
THEY'RE COOKING HUNDREDS OF HOT DOGS FOR AFTER CHURCH,
I'M LIKE, I FELT LIKE I JUST GOT HIT OVER AND OVER,
AND AS I SAT DOWN,
THE MINISTER STARTED TALKING ABOUT THE ICE CREAM FESTIVAL
THEY HAD THE NIGHT BEFORE, AND I'M FURIOUS.
IT'S LIKE THAT MOMENT WHERE YOUR EYES GET OPEN.
AND WHEN MY WIFE FOUND ME IN CHURCH,
SHE FOUND ME TYPING ON MY PHONE,
AND SHE THINKS OF THE PHONE AS THE OTHER WOMAN,
BECAUSE IT HAS MY ATTENTION.
AND SHE GAVE ME THAT LOOK THAT ONLY YOUR WIFE IS
ALLOWED TO GIVE YOU, LIKE DON'T YOU KNOW YOU'RE GOING TO HELL?
AND I SHOWED HER WHAT I WAS TYPING.
GO TO CHURCH, GET DOUGHNUTS, BACON, SAUSAGE,
HOT DOGS, ICE CREAM.
THEY HAVE NO IDEA THEY ARE SENDING PEOPLE TO HEAVEN EARLY.
SAVE THEM, THEN KILL THEM.
THIS IS NOT THE PLAN.
AND I PRAYED THAT SUNDAY GOD WOULD USE ME TO
CHANGE THE CULTURE OF FOOD AT CHURCH.
AND WHILE I'M PRAYING THAT, I'M LIKE,
THIS IS THE DUMBEST PRAYER YOU'VE EVER PRAYED.
LIKE HOW IS THAT EVER GOING TO HAPPEN?
AND -- BUT I HAVE AN ATTITUDE WITH GOD,
AND I'M LIKE, IT'S MY PRAYER, DEAL WITH IT.
TWO WEEKS LATER, NO LIE, THIS IS EXACTLY HOW IT HAPPENED,
PASTOR RICK WARREN FROM SADDLEBACK CHURCH CALLED ME.
HE'S BEEN ON THE COVER OFTIME MAGAZINE AS AMERICA'S PASTOR
TWICE.
AND HE SAID, I'M FAT, MY CHURCH IS FAT,
WILL YOU HELP ME?
AND I'M LIKE, YOU HAD ME FROM HELLO.
AND WE CREATED THE DANIEL PLAN,
WHICH IS A PROGRAM TO GET THE WORLD HEALTHY THROUGH CHURCHES.
AND WHAT THAT TEACHES YOU IS INTENTION AND PRAYER MATTER
THAT SET YOUR MIND TO THINGS THAT ARE NOT ABOUT YOU,
BUT ABOUT WHY GOD PUT YOU ON THE EARTH.
AND IF YOU LIVE WITH PURPOSE,
YOU'RE GOING TO BE SO MUCH HAPPIER THAN IF YOU LIVE
WITH THE THOUGHT, I AM NOT ENOUGH.
BECAUSE COMPARED TO CHRIST, EVERYBODY'S NOT ENOUGH.
REBECCA: IT'S SO INTERESTING, TOO,
BECAUSE I WAS LISTENING TO ANOTHER PODCAST,
AND THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT FASTING
AND HOW IN THE WEST IN AMERICA,
THIS IS ALSO SOMETHING WITH FOOD,
WE DON'T REALLY FAST,
EVEN IN THE CHURCH AS MUCH AS MAYBE CHRISTIANS
IN OTHER PARTS OF THE WORLD.
IT'S NOT AS MUCH APART OF OUR CULTURE,
BUT HOW TAKING AWAY THAT FOOD AND GOING THAT TIME
WITHOUT FOOD, HOW IT HELPS CLEAR THE MIND,
IT OPENS YOUR SPIRIT UP TO RECEIVE FROM THE LORD,
WE REALLY HAVE MADE FOOD IN THE WEST VERY MUCH LIKE
A CRUTCH OF SUPPORT, AND A LOT OF OUR FOOD IS NOT NATURAL,
IT IS ULTRA-PROCESSED,
AND BECAUSE SO MANY PEOPLE HAVE BEEN RAISED IN IT,
LIKE I'M FROM THE '90S, I WAS LIKE -- WE WERE LIKE
THE CHIEF PROCESSED FOOD, IT WAS LIKE ALL WE EVER ATE,
AND NOW THERE'S BEEN LIKE AN AWAKENING,
WE'RE LIKE, OH, MY GOODNESS, THIS IS SO BAD.
BUT OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH FOOD IS SO IMPORTANT OVERALL
AS BELIEVERS.
WHAT WOULD YOU SAY ARE SOME OF THE MAIN BIG NO'S?
SO WITH SUGAR, ALL KINDS OF SUGAR?
DR. AMEN: WELL, HALF THE POPULATION IS DIABETIC
OR PRE-DIABETIC, AND IF YOU'RE DIABETIC OR PRE-DIABETIC,
THAT IS REALLY BAD FOR YOUR BRAIN.
AND SO --
REBECCA: CAN YOU TALK ABOUT WHAT IT DOES,
THE DIABETES TO THE BRAIN?
DR. AMEN: WELL, WHAT DIABETES DOES IS IT MAKES
YOUR BLOOD VESSELS, SO THE HIGH BLOOD SUGAR LEVELS
THAT ARE CHRONIC MAKES YOUR BLOOD VESSELS LESS PLIABLE.
THEY BECOME BRITTLE AND MORE LIKELY TO BREAK.
REBECCA: OH, GOSH.
DR. AMEN: SO IT'S A HIGHER RISK FOR HEART DISEASE, FOR STROKES.
AND YOU GET WOUNDS THAT JUST WON'T HEAL
BECAUSE IT WON'T GET PROPER NUTRIENTS, BLOODFLOW.
AND I AVOID SUGAR AND THINGS THAT QUICKLY TURN TO SUGAR;
BREAD, PASTA, POTATOES, RICE, FRUIT JUICE, SUGAR.
FRUIT JUICE IS THE ENEMY, RIGHT.
IF I WANT TO POST SOMETHING AND JUST GET A LOT OF HATE,
RIGHT, I'LL POST ABOUT MARIJUANA
AND GET A LOT OF HATE, POST ABOUT FRUIT JUICE,
ISN'T THAT GOOD FOR YOU, IT'S LIKE WHEN IS IT RATIONAL
TO UNWRAP FRUIT SUGAR FROM ITS FIBER SOURCE
AND IT'S LIKE, EAT THE ORANGE.
DON'T DRINK THE JUICE OF FOUR ORANGES.
IT'S NOT RATIONAL, IT'S NOT GOOD FOR YOU.
REBECCA: SO I LIKE THAT.
SO YOU FOCUS ON THE GLUCOSE SPIKES
AND KEEPING YOUR BLOOD SUGAR MORE EVEN, BECAUSE IF YOU CAN
KEEP YOUR BLOOD SUGAR MORE EVEN,
YOU'RE NOT STRESSING OUT YOUR INSULIN,
INSULIN RESISTANCE CAUSES ALL SORTS OF TYPE OF DISEASES.
AND SO IT'S FOCUSING NOT JUST LIKE ON CANE SUGAR
BUT REALLY EATING IT AWAY WHERE YOU'RE NOT SPIKING YOUR SUGAR
ALL THE TIME AND EATING REALLY MUCH ALL
-- EVEN EATING TOO OFTEN OR SPIKING THAT CONSISTENTLY
THROUGHOUT THE DAY CAUSES PROBLEMS.
DR. AMEN: YES.
AND TALKING ABOUT FASTING, INTERMITTENT FASTING IS
REALLY GREAT FOR A LOT OF PEOPLE TO MANAGE THEIR WEIGHT.
EATING THREE TIMES A DAY, THAT IS NOT NECESSARY.
THAT IS BECAUSE OF MARKETING AND THE CEREAL COMPANIES.
IT'S LIKE, OH, FOR BREAKFAST,
HAVE A HEALTHY BREAKFAST; WHEATIES:
THE BREAKFAST OF DIABETES,
WHICH IS WHAT IT IS, RIGHT.
OR MY WIFE TALKS ABOUT GROWING UP WITH HER BEST FRIENDS
WERE TONY THE TIGER, CAPTAIN, AND THE LEPRECHAUN.
[ LAUGHING ]
DR. AMEN: AND IT'S LIKE HER GRANDMOTHER HAD DIABETES.
IT'S LIKE YOU HAVE THIS IN YOUR FAMILY,
YOU NEED TO BE SERIOUS.
AND SO BOTH OF US.
WE'RE A CONTINUOUS GLUCOSE MONITOR,
JUST REMINDS YOU OF, OH, I HAD RICE WITH THAT ONE MEAL,
AND NOW MY BLOOD SUGAR'S 155.
IT'S LIKE, MM, LET'S NOT DO THAT.
OR CHERRIES.
LIKE I LOVE CHERRIES.
BUT THEY DON'T LOVE ME.
THEY SPIKE MY BLOOD SUGAR.
BLUEBERRIES AND RASPBERRIES DON'T DO THAT.
REBECCA: WOW.
THAT IS SO INTERESTING.
WHAT ARE SOME OTHER BIG NO'S FOR THE BRAIN?
DR. AMEN: HITTING SOCCER BALLS WITH YOUR HEAD,
ALLOWING YOUR CHILDREN TO PLAY CONTACT SPORTS.
NOW, I'M A HUGE FAN OF TENNIS, TABLE TENNIS,
PICKLEBALL, GOLF, GOLF IS GOOD.
FOOTBALL, BAD FOR THE BRAIN.
I DID THE BIG NFL STUDY WHEN THE NFL WAS LYING.
IT HAD A PROBLEM WITH TRAUMATIC BRAIN INJURY IN FOOTBALL
AT HIGH LEVELS OF DAMAGE.
BUT 80% OF MY PLAYERS GET BETTER
WHEN WE PUT THEM ON A REHABILITATION PROGRAM.
BUT IF MY CHILD SAID, SO I WAS AT A BIG CONFERENCE,
AND THIS BILLIONAIRE WAS THERE,
AND HEARD ME TALK IT, AND HE SAID,
BUT MY CHILD REALLY WANTS TO PLAY.
IN FACT, I HIRED HIM A FORMER NFL PLAYER AS A COACH.
AND I'M LIKE, BUT WHAT IF YOUR CHILD REALLY WANTED
TO DO COCAINE?
WOULD YOU HIRE THE BEST DRUG DEALER FOR HIM?
BECAUSE THE LEVEL OF DAMAGE FROM FOOTBALL
IS ABOUT THE SAME AS THE DAMAGE I'VE SEEN ON SCANS FROM COCAINE.
YOUR BRAIN IS SOFT, ABOUT THE CONSISTENCY OF SOFT BUTTER.
YOUR SKULL IS REALLY HARD AND HAS SHARP BONE AVERAGES.
MILD TRAUMATIC BRAIN INJURY IS A MAJOR CAUSE
OF PSYCHIATRIC PROBLEMS.
AND NOBODY KNOWS ABOUT IT
BECAUSE PEOPLE DON'T GENERALLY LOOK AT THE BRAIN.
AND SO IF I HAD CHILDREN TODAY,
I WOULD HAVE A PING-PONG TABLE AT HOME,
I'D PLAY WITH THEM EVERY DAY,
I WOULD GET THEM A COACH, I WOULD HELP THEM GET GOOD,
BECAUSE THAT SKILL IS AMAZING.
I WOULD NOT LET THEM PLAY A CONTACT SPORT.
BECAUSE I LOVE THEM.
BUT WHAT IF THEY WANTED TO?
THAT'S WHY GOD GAVE YOU PARENTS SO THAT YOU COULD
HAVE DIRECTION ON THEIR DECISIONS
UNTIL THEIR BRAIN IS FULLY DEVELOPED.
AND OH, BY THE WAY, IT'S NOT FULLY DEVELOPED
UNTIL THEY'RE 25.
REBECCA: OH, MY GOODNESS.
OKAY.
SO ONE OF THE THINGS THAT I WANT TO TALK ABOUT,
BECAUSE A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE TALKING ABOUT THIS RIGHT NOW,
IS DOPAMINE, AND DOPAMINE HITS
AND HOW WITH SOCIAL MEDIA AND THE WAY SOCIETY IS SET UP
THESE DAYS IS WE'RE TAKING THESE DOPAMINE HITS ALL DAY.
HOW DOES THAT AFFECT THE MIND, THE BRAIN?
DR. AMEN: WELL, YOU'RE BEING THRILLED TO DEATH.
IN FACT, IT'S ACTUALLY DEADENING THE AREA OF THE BRAIN
THAT RESPONDS TO DOPAMINE,
AND IT'S CALLED THE NUCLEUS ACCUMBENS,
AND IF YOU'RE CONSTANTLY ON YOUR SMARTPHONE,
IF YOU'RE LOOKING AT PORNOGRAPHY,
IF YOU'RE SCROLLING SOCIAL MEDIA,
IF YOU'RE CHRONICALLY SHOPPING, IT'S DOPAMINE,
DOPAMINE, DOPAMINE, DOPAMINE,
AND IT STARTS TO DEADEN THAT AREA,
AND THEN YOU BEGIN TO NEED MORE TO FEEL ANYTHING AT ALL.
SO LIKE AN ADDICTION, PEOPLE,
ONCE THEY'RE ADDICTED TO SOMETHING,
THEY'RE NOT CHASING THE HIGH.
WHAT THEY'RE DOING IS THEY'RE TRYING TO PREVENT THE LOW.
AND THIS CONSTANT DOPAMINE-DUMPING
IS WEARING OUT THEIR PLEASURE CENTER,
IT'S MAKING THEM AT GREATER RISK FOR ANXIETY, DEPRESSION,
ADDICTION, OVEREATING.
REBECCA: IS THERE A WAY TO COMBAT IF YOU HAVE
AN OVERDOING THE DOPAMINE HITS,
IS THERE A WAY TO DETOX FROM THAT AND RESET?
DR. AMEN: YEAH.
IT'S LIKE GO OUTSIDE AND PLAY AND DON'T GIVE KIDS SMARTPHONES
UNTIL THEY CAN PAY FOR THEM THEMSELVES.
AND I HAD THIS EXAMPLE.
WHEN MY GRANDSON, WHEN MY OLDEST ONE,
WAS NINE MONTHS OLD, HE FIGURED OUT HOW TO WORK
HIS PARENTS' SMARTPHONE.
AND THEN EVERY TIME I'M WITH HIM UNTIL HE'S 5, PHONE.
POP POP, PHONE.
I'M LIKE, NO, WE'RE NOT PLAYING WITH THE PHONE.
WE'RE PLAYING WITH EACH OTHER.
POP POP, PHONE.
AND I'M LIKE, NO.
REBECCA: IS IT NOT CRAZY?
DR. AMEN: LIKE DON'T ASK ME AGAIN.
NO.
AND I HAVE A RULE, BECAUSE YOU HAVE THREE CHILDREN?
REBECCA: I HAVE THREE.
DR. AMEN: HERE'S A RULE.
YOU'LL LOVE THIS RULE.
IF YOU HAVE A TANTRUM TO GET YOUR WAY,
THE ANSWER IS NO.
IT'S ALWAYS GOING TO BE NO.
GO AHEAD, THROW THE TANTRUM.
AND BE EXCITED ABOUT IT.
BUT THEN YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND ALWAYS HAVE TO SAY NO
AND NEVER REINFORCE THE TANTRUM AS A WAY TO
GET OUT OF AN EMBARRASSING SITUATION.
YOU HAVE IT, THE ANSWER'S NO.
AND KIDS LEARN QUICKLY.
OH, I DIDN'T GET ANYTHING THERE EXCEPT CONSEQUENCES.
REBECCA: SO ANYTHING ON THE SMARTPHONE,
BECAUSE LIKE THE REASON WHY I ASK IS BECAUSE
MY KIDS KNOW HOW TO USE THE PHONE.
WELL, NOT MY BABY, OBVIOUSLY,
BUT LIKE MY TODDLER, HE'S ALMOST 3,
HE KNOWS HOW TO USE THE PHONE, AND I'VE SEEN THAT.
I'VE SEEN -- AND I USED TO BE LIKE, OKAY,
WE CAN'T WATCH ANYTHING ON MY PHONE,
BUT LIKE I HAVE SPOTIFY, SO I'LL BE LIKE,
YOU CAN LISTEN TO SONGS, BECAUSE HE'S NOT LOOKING AT THE PHONE.
BUT WHAT I REALIZE IS I CAN'T GIVE IT TO HIM
BECAUSE HE WOULD SIT THERE AND HE WOULD CLICK
NEXT, NEXT, NEXT, AND THAT'S THAT SAME DOPAMINE HIT.
SO WHAT, RIGHT, THAT'S A DOPAMINE HIT?
DR. AMEN: THAT'S RIGHT.
REBECCA: AND THAT'S WHAT THEY'RE ADDICTED TO.
DR. AMEN: RIGHT.
REBECCA: IT'S AWFUL.
DR. AMEN: AND THEY WERE CREATED SPECIFICALLY TO DO THAT
SO THAT THESE DEVICES WOULD GET MINDSHARE.
AND YOU DON'T WANT GOOGLE AND FACEBOOK
BECAUSE THEY'VE SHOWN THAT THEY'RE EVIL.
[ CHUCKLES ]
REBECCA: I'VE HEARD ABOUT THIS.
LIKE THE PEOPLE WHO CREATED IT DON'T USE IT BECAUSE THEY KNOW.
DR. AMEN: AND THEY DON'T LET THEIR KIDS USE IT.
REBECCA: YEAH.
SO WHY ARE WE?
DR. AMEN: AND THEY GO ON DOPAMINE FASTS ALL THE TIME
BECAUSE WE'RE SHEEP.
IN MY BOOK, BRAIN WARRIOR'S WAY ,
I TALK ABOUT, ARE YOU A SHEEP OR A SHEEPDOG OR A WOLF?
AND SO COCA-COLA'S CLEARLY A WOLF, RIGHT.
GOOGLE IS A WOLF.
BUT 98% OF OUR SOCIETY ARE SHEEP.
AND IT'S LIKE, OH, WELL, EVERYBODY'S DOING IT,
SO WE SHOULD DO IT.
SHEEP ARE EASILY LED, AND THEY GO WITH THE HERD.
SHEEPDOGS, THEY'RE FOCUSED.
THEY'RE PAYING ATTENTION.
AND THE SHEEP OFTEN DON'T LIKE THE SHEEPDOGS
BECAUSE THEY'RE KEEPING THEM IN LINE.
SO A LOT OF PEOPLE GO, I CAN'T HAVE ORANGE JUICE?
AND IT'S LIKE, NOT NEVER.
BUT DON'T MAKE THAT PART OF YOUR LIFE
IF YOU DON'T WANT TO HAVE DIABETES, AND THEY'RE CALLING
ALZHEIMER'S DISEASE TYPE III DIABETES
BECAUSE HIGH BLOOD SUGAR LEVELS LEAD TO BRAIN DISRUPTION.
REBECCA: I FEEL LIKE MOST -- A LOT OF DISEASES
ARE COMING FROM THE INSULIN-RESISTANCE AND INFLAMMATION.
A LOT OF DISEASES ARE CONNECTED TO THAT.
AND THERE IS SUCH A HIGH, NOT ONLY HAS THERE BEEN
A MASSIVE INCREASE IN DIABETES,
THERE'S BEEN A MASSIVE INCREASE IN ALZHEIMER'S COMPARATIVELY.
AND SO WE SHOULD LOOK AT THIS AND SAY,
WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?
DR. AMEN: AND DEPRESSION,
WHICH MANY PEOPLE THINK IS INFLAMMATORY,
IS YOUR EMOTIONAL SYSTEM IS INFLAMED,
AND THAT'S WHY YOU'RE SAD.
REBECCA: WOW.
DR. AMEN: KILLING THE SUGAR
AND FOODS THAT TURN TO SUGAR; AND THEN OMEGA-3 FATTY ACIDS,
ANTI-INFLAMMATORY; CURCUMENS FROM TURMERIC,
ANTI-INFLAMMATORY; FLOSSING YOUR TEETH,
ANTI-INFLAMMATORY; GETTING YOUR GUT HEALTHY WITH FIBER,
ANTI-INFLAMMATORY; NOT EATING FOODS WITH PESTICIDES,
ANTI-INFLAMMATORY.
REBECCA: WOW.
THAT IS WILD.
HOW DO YOU DO A DOPAMINE FAST?
DO YOU RECOMMEND THAT TO YOUR PATIENTS?
DR. AMEN: I THINK YOU SHOULD BE AWARE OF WHAT YOU'RE CONSUMING
AND --
REBECCA: BECAUSE IT CONTROLS YOUR LIFE.
THAT'S WHAT I STARTED SEEING WITH MYSELF,
WITH THE DOPAMINE HITS, YOU BECOME LIKE WIRED FOR IT.
AND I WAS LIKE, THIS IS AFFECTING ME,
AND I DON'T LIKE THE EFFECTS OF IT.
I FEEL LIKE ALMOST -- YOU FEEL LIKE A PRISONER.
DR. AMEN: WELL, I THINK YOU SHOULD TAKE AN INVENTORY
OF WHAT ARE THE THINGS YOU'RE DOING THAT INCREASE DOPAMINE.
AND JUST ASK YOURSELF, GOOD FOR MY BRAIN OR BAD FOR IT?
AND SO THE NON-STOP SCROLLING,
BAD FOR YOUR BRAIN.
IT'S REALLY CLEAR.
GOOD FOR MY BRAIN OR BAD FOR IT.
RIGHT.
THAT'S THE MOTHER QUESTION.
I WORKED WITH BJ FOGG FOR SIX MONTHS.
HE RUNS THE PERSUASIVE TECHNOLOGY LAB AT STANFORD
ON HOW PEOPLE CHANGE.
REBECCA: WOW.
DR. AMEN: AND HE SAID, MAKE THE HABITS AS SMALL AS YOU CAN.
AND SO WHENEVER YOU COME TO A DECISION POINT IN YOUR DAY,
IS THIS GOOD FOR MY BRAIN OR BAD FOR IT?
JUST LIKE CHLOE'S GAME THAT WE TALKED ABOUT DOING
WITH THE KIDS.
BUT I THINK IF YOU CAN ANSWER THAT WITH INFORMATION AND LOVE,
LOVE OF YOURSELF,
LOVE OF YOUR FAMILY, LOVE OF GOD,
LOVE THE REASON GOD PUT YOU ON EARTH,
YOU JUST START MAKING BETTER DECISIONS.
REBECCA: WHAT ARE SOME THINGS YOU SAY ARE GOOD FOR YOUR BRAIN
THAT YOU RECOMMEND YOUR PATIENTS TO DO?
DR. AMEN: NEW LEARNING.
MY FAVORITE THING, SO LET'S JUST GO TO MY NUMBER ONE HABIT
THAT I DO EVERY DAY,
IS WHEN I GO TO BED AT NIGHT, I SAY A PRAYER,
AND THEN I GO, WHAT WENT WELL TODAY?
AND I START AT THE BEGINNING OF MY DAY WHEN I WOKE UP,
AND I'M LIKE, I GO HOUR BY HOUR LOOKING AT
WHAT I LIKED ABOUT THE DAY.
AND I HAVE ALL SORTS OF AWESOME THINGS THAT HAPPEN
THROUGHOUT MY DAY AND I JUST GLOSS OVER IT BECAUSE IT'S LIKE,
NEXT.
NEXT, NEXT.
IT'S JUST A TIME TO SAVOR THE DAY.
AND IF A BAD THING SHOWS UP,
IMAGINE A BIG BROOM AND SWEEP IT AWAY.
LIKE, DEAL WITH YOU TOMORROW.
NOT DEALING WITH YOU NOW.
NOW IS WHAT WENT WELL.
AND PEOPLE WHO DO THAT NOTICE A SIGNIFICANT INCREASE
IN HAPPINESS IN JUST THREE WEEKS.
BUT MAKE IT A HABIT.
SO I'VE BEEN DOING THIS FOR TEN YEARS.
AND FIVE YEARS AGO, YEAH, FIVE YEARS AGO, MY DAD DIED.
AND IT WAS THE WORST DAY OF MY ADULT LIFE.
AND WHEN I WENT TO BED THAT NIGHT, I'M LIKE,
SAID A PRAYER AND I WENT, WHAT WENT WELL TODAY?
AND HERMY, THE VOICE IN MY HEAD, GOES, SERIOUSLY?
WE'RE DOING THAT TODAY?
YOU ARE SUCH AN EVIL HUMAN BEING THAT YOU WOULD DO THAT
THE DAY YOUR FATHER DIED.
BUT BECAUSE IT'S MY HABIT, MY BRAIN WENT TO AN INTERACTION
BETWEEN MY MOTHER AND THE POLICE OFFICER,
AND IT WAS HYSTERICAL.
SHE'S LIKE, BECAUSE THE POLICE OFFICER I KNEW SAID,
WE HAVE TO DO AN INVESTIGATION,
BECAUSE HE DIED AT HOME.
AND SHE GOES, DO YOU THINK I KILLED HIM?
DO YOU THINK I HAVE A BOYFRIEND?
AND IT WAS SO FUNNY.
AND I JUST -- I THOUGHT ABOUT THAT,
AND THEN I THOUGHT ABOUT ALL THE TEXTS I GOT FROM MY FRIENDS
WHO LOVE ME AND LOVED MY DAD,
AND THEN I REMEMBER JUST HOLDING HIS HAND
BEFORE THE MORTUARY TOOK HIM AWAY,
AND IT WAS JUST SO SOFT.
AND THEN I WENT TO SLEEP.
REBECCA: WOW.
DR. AMEN: AND IT DIDN'T MEAN I DIDN'T GRIEVE.
I STILL GRIEVE.
DIDN'T MEAN I DIDN'T LOVE HIM, I STILL LOVE HIM.
BUT I'M MANAGING MY MIND THROUGH THE HABITS I ENGAGE IN
DAY IN AND DAY OUT,
ARE THESE GOOD FOR MY BRAIN OR BAD FOR IT?
REBECCA: THAT'S SO GOOD.
YOU ALSO WROTE A BOOK ON RAISING THE MENTALLY STRONG KIDS.
I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR, BECAUSE I HAVE THREE SMALL CHILDREN,
LIKE MAYBE SOME OF YOU THINK THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS
PARENTS SHOULD BE DOING FOR THEIR CHILDREN.
DR. AMEN: SO NUMBER ONE,
YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND CREATE GOALS.
WHAT KIND OF PARENTS DO WE WANT TO BE
AND WHAT KIND OF CHILDREN DO WE WANT TO RAISE?
BECAUSE EVERYTHING FLOWS FROM INTENTION, FIRST THING.
SECOND THING, BONDING.
IF YOU WANT TO RAISE MENTALLY STRONG KIDS,
THEY HAVE TO BE ATTACHED.
AND IF YOU'RE AN INFLUENCE ON THEM,
IF YOU'RE BONDED WITH THEM,
THEY'RE GOING TO PICK YOUR VALUES.
AND SO TIME, ACTUAL PHYSICAL TIME,
JUST 20 MINUTES A DAY.
YOU HAVE THREE, SO THAT COULD BE A LOT,
BUT AT LEAST 10 MINUTES A DAY THAT INDIVIDUALLY
THAT'S THEIR TIME WITH MOMMY,
THAT'S THEIR TIME WITH DADDY.
AND DURING THAT TIME, NO COMMANDS, NO QUESTIONS,
NO DIRECTIONS.
IT'S NOT TIME TO TEACH THEM,
IT'S NOT TIME TO CORRECT THEM.
IT'S JUST TIME TO BE IN THEIR SPACE.
AND THEN ACTIVELY LISTENING.
I WANT YOU TO PRACTICE WHEN THEY SAY SOMETHING,
JUST REPEAT BACK WHAT THEY SAY
AND STOP TELLING THEM HOW TO THINK.
BUT LET THEM TALK THROUGH THEIR OWN PROBLEMS.
ACTIVE LISTENING.
TIME AND ACTIVE LISTENING, GAMECHANGING.
AND THEN I THINK IT'S GOOD TO HAVE RULES AT HOME.
THE BRAIN NEEDS STRUCTURE LIKE WE TREAT EACH OTHER
WITH RESPECT, TELL THE TRUTH.
IF YOU TAKE SOMETHING OUT, PUT IT AWAY.
THE KIDS WHO WORK AS CHILDREN
HAVE THE BEST SELF-ESTEEM AS ADULTS.
REBECCA: I'VE HEARD THAT.
DR. AMEN: YEAH.
SO DON'T DO TOO MUCH FOR THEM
AND ALWAYS LOOK FOR WAYS FOR THEM TO BE HELPFUL.
BECAUSE IF YOU DO TOO MUCH FOR YOUR CHILDREN,
YOU ARE RAISING YOUR SELF-ESTEEM BY STEALING THEIRS.
AND SELF-ESTEEM COMES FROM COMPETENCE.
WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE YOU CAN CONTRIBUTE,
YOU FEEL GOOD ABOUT IT.
IF YOU'RE JUST DEMANDING, THEN EVERYBODY'S DOING THINGS
FOR YOU, YOU DON'T FEEL COMPETENT,
YOU DON'T FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF,
AND PEOPLE DON'T FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOU.
REBECCA: WOW.
DR. AMEN: AND THEN MODEL BRAIN HEALTH.
RIGHT.
THE MOST IMPORTANT WAY TO GIVE SOMETHING AWAY IS TO GET IT.
IT'S YOU HAVE TO MODEL IT.
REBECCA: IS THERE AN AGE THAT YOU THINK
FOR HAVING THEM HELP OUT IS LIKE OPTIMAL?
DR. AMEN: AS SOON AS THEY CAN.
REBECCA: OKAY.
DR. AMEN: EVEN IN LITTLE STUFF.
REBECCA: OKAY.
DR. AMEN: EVEN WITH A 9 MONTH OLD, IT'S,
CAN YOU HELP ME WITH THIS?
THEY FEEL SO GOOD ABOUT THEMSELVES.
REBECCA: AW.
I LOVE THAT.
OKAY.
IS THERE ANY BIG NO'S WITH KIDS?
DR. AMEN: YEAH.
DON'T BEAT THEM.
REBECCA: YEAH.
[ LAUGHING ]
DR. AMEN: IT'S NOT HELPFUL.
AND IT'S LIKE, SPARE THE ROD, SPARE THE CHILD.
OKAY, WHO SAID THAT?
SOLOMON, WHOSE CHILDREN WERE TERRIBLE.
BUT IT'S IN THE BIBLE.
WHAT IT REALLY MEANS, I BELIEVE,
IS DISCIPLINE IS IMPORTANT,
BUT ALL THE RESEARCH SAYS PHYSICAL AGGRESSION
AGAINST CHILDREN IS NOT THE RIGHT THING TO DO.
REBECCA: SO ALL SPANKING?
DR. AMEN: WELL, IF YOU JUST POP THEM ON THE BUTT ONCE.
BUT THE PEOPLE I SEE IN MY OFFICE,
THEY GET THEIR PANTS DOWN AND THEN BEATEN WITH A BELT.
NO, THAT'S ABUSE.
WE HAVE TO BE THOUGHTFUL WITH IT.
AND DISCIPLINE IS TEACHING, RIGHT,
IT'S TO TEACH, TO DISCIPLE RATHER THAN VENGEANCE
BECAUSE YOU'RE ANGRY.
REBECCA: OH, YEAH.
DR. AMEN: SO THE WORDS TO ALWAYS DEFAULT TO,
YOU'LL NEVER MAKE A MISTAKE IF YOU DEFAULT TO THESE TWO WORDS.
FIRM.
YOU SAY SOMETHING, MEAN IT.
KIND.
DO IT WITH THE RIGHT INTENTION,
THE RIGHT TONE OF VOICE.
AND ALWAYS ROOT FOR THEM AND HOPE THEY MAKE LOTS OF MISTAKES
YOU CAN TEACH THEM WITH.
AND DON'T RESCUE THEM.
THAT'S SO IMPORTANT.
IF YOU RESCUE THEM, THEY'LL BECOME DEPENDENT,
AND THAT'S NOT WHAT YOU WANT.
REBECCA: NO.
YEAH, THAT VERSE, SPARE THE ROD,
THE WAY WHEN I'D STUDIED IT IS IT'S ACTUALLY
THE ROD THAT LIKE A SHEPHERD USES,
AND THE SHEPHERD GUIDES MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE,
TEACHES, LIKE YOU'RE SAYING,
IT'S THAT KIND OF DISCIPLINE WHERE YOU'RE
ACTIVE IN THEIR LIFE, BUT IT'S MORE TEACHING THEM.
BUT WE'RE IN THAT, I'M IN THE ERA,
MY GENERATION RIGHT NOW, IT'S ALL ABOUT GENTLE PARENTING
AND NOT SPANKING AT ALL,
THAT IT'S BAD FOR YOUR KID.
WHAT KIND OF DISCIPLINING CAN YOU BE FIRM THAT WON'T
HURT THE KID BUT WILL SEND THE MESSAGE TO THE CHILD?
DR. AMEN: IT'S OFTEN INDIVIDUALIZED,
BUT I'M A HUGE FAN OF TIME-OUT.
REBECCA: SEE, BECAUSE SOME PEOPLE TOLD ME THAT'S BAD.
THAT'S WHY IT'S SO CONFUSING AS A PARENT.
DR. AMEN: WHO TOLD YOU?
REBECCA: JUST A COUNSELOR LADY.
SHE SAYS BECAUSE THEY'RE ALONE AND THEN THEY CAN BE
ALONE WITH THEIR THOUGHTS, BAD THOUGHTS,
AND YOU'RE ISOLATING THEM.
IT'S BEEN SO HARD, I'M TELLING YOU.
JUST AS A PARENT, YOU'RE LIKE, UGH, GOD,
BECAUSE YOU JUST WANT TO DO RIGHT BY YOUR KIDS,
BUT YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT'S RIGHT OR WHAT'S NOT RIGHT.
DR. AMEN: WELL, I'VE BEEN DOING THIS 45 YEARS,
AND I THINK TIME-OUT APPROPRIATELY.
AND THE TIME STARTS, THIS IS HOW I DO IT.
REBECCA: OKAY, TEACH ME.
TEACH ME.
DR. AMEN: SO IF THEY HAVE A TANTRUM,
THE ANSWER'S ALWAYS NO.
AND IF YOU, IN A MOMENT OF WEAKNESS,
GIVE INTO IT JUST TO SHUT THEM UP, GO, HM,
HAVE TO LEARN FROM THAT.
AND EVERY DAY AS A MOM, YOU WIN OR YOU LEARN.
SO YOU HAVE TO BE VERY CAREFUL NOT TO INCRIMINATE YOURSELF
AND TO MANAGE YOUR OWN THOUGHTS.
EVERY DAY, I WIN OR I LEARN.
AND THERE'S NOT PARENTING CLASSES.
THERE SHOULD BE, RIGHT, IN HIGH SCHOOL,
BECAUSE IT'S LIKE, YOU BRING THESE THINGS HOME,
AND IT'S LIKE, WHERE'S THE INSTRUCTION MANUAL?
REBECCA: THERE'S NONE!
DR. AMEN: AND I WROTE ONE CALLED
RAISING MENTALLY STRONG KIDS .
IT'S THE INSTRUCTION MANUAL THAT SHOULD HAVE
COME WITH YOUR KIDS.
BUT WHEN YOU ASK THEM TO DO SOMETHING AND THEY DON'T,
I THINK IT'S GOOD.
WARN THEM ONCE.
ONCE, NOT THREE TIMES.
IT'S LIKE, LOOK, YOU CAN DO THIS OR YOU CAN TAKE A TIME-OUT
AND THEN YOU CAN DO IT.
I DON'T CARE, IT'S UP TO YOU.
SEE, THE MINDSET IS SO IMPORTANT NOT TO KNOW,
BECAUSE IF THEY HAVE ADD, THEY'RE CONFLICT-SEEKING.
THEY ARE MASTERFUL AT MAKING MOMMY CRY.
THEY'RE MASTERFUL AT MAKING MOMMY SCREAM
BECAUSE THEY GET A DOPAMINE HIT FROM CONFLICT.
REBECCA: OH, BECAUSE THEY GET ATTENTION?
DR. AMEN: BECAUSE THEY GET ATTENTION FROM IT.
AND THAT'S WHY, IF YOU'RE SPENDING TIME WITH THEM,
IF YOU'RE LISTENING TO THEM.
WHEN I TEACH TIME-OUT IN OUR PARENTING CLASSES,
WE DON'T DO IT UNTIL WEEK SIX BECAUSE BY THEN,
PEOPLE HAVE GOALS.
THEY'RE SPENDING TIME WITH THEM.
THEY'RE LISTENING.
THERE'RE RULES.
SO GETTING SOME CLARITY AND STRUCTURE IN THE HOME.
BUT WHEN I SAY SOMETHING, I MEAN IT.
AND PLEASE DO THIS.
NO.
I SAID, LOOK, YOU HAVE A CHOICE.
YOU CAN DO IT NOW OR YOU CAN TAKE A TIME-OUT
AND THEN YOU CAN DO IT.
NO!
AND IT'S LIKE, ALL RIGHT.
ABOUT THEIR AGE IN MINUTES FOR THE TIME-OUT.
SO IF THEY'RE 3, IT'S LIKE 3 MINUTES.
AND TIME STARTS WHEN THEY'RE QUIET.
SO DON'T LET THEM GO TO TIME-OUT.
AND THE IDEA THAT THEY HAVE TO BE ALONE WITH THEIR THOUGHTS,
THEY'RE ALONE WITH THEIR THOUGHTS ALL THE TIME, RIGHT.
THAT'S SORT OF SILLY.
PLUS, I WANT YOU TO TEACH THEM WITHCAPTAIN SNOUT ,
MY CHILDREN'S BOOK, IF YOU HAVE A NEGATIVE THOUGHT,
JUST ASK YOURSELF WHETHER OR NOT IT'S TRUE.
REBECCA: YEAH, THAT'S POWERFUL.
DR. AMEN: AND WHEN THEIR TIME IS UP,
HUG THEM, AND GO,
NOW YOU HAVE TO DO IT.
AND YOU HAVE TO WIN.
IF THEY WIN, THEY WILL ALWAYS WIN.
YOU NEED TO BE THE AUTHORITY.
I THINK THAT'S WHY GOD GAVE US PARENTS;
TO DIRECT US, TO GUIDE US WITH LOVE, WITH HOPE,
ALWAYS ROOTING FOR THEM TO DO THE RIGHT THING
BUT HELPING THEM MAKE MISTAKES SO WE CAN TEACH THEM.
REBECCA: THAT'S SO GOOD.
WELL, THIS HAS BEEN SUCH AN EYE-OPENING CONVERSATION.
I AM JUST SO THANKFUL FOR YOU
AND EVERYTHING THAT YOU'RE DOING.
FOR THESE INCREDIBLE RESOURCES THAT YOU'VE REFERENCED
IN THE INTERVIEW,
WHAT IS THE BEST WAY?
JUST AMAZON?
OR DO YOU HAVE A WEBSITE?
DR. AMEN: SO THEY CAN GET OUR BOOKS AT
AMAZON.COM.
AMEN LIKE THE LAST WORD IN A PRAYER.
OR LEARN ABOUT OUR CLINICS AT AMENCLINICS.COM.
AND FOLLOW ME @DOCAMEN ON INSTAGRAM AND TIKTOK.
REBECCA: WELL, DOCTOR, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE.
YOU'RE A BLESSING.
AND THANK YOU, EVERYONE, FOR LISTENING TO
THE REBECCA WEISS PODCAST .