WEBVTT
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REBECCA WEISS: IN
THIS EPISODE,
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I SIT DOWN WITH
PAUL DAUGHERTY,
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SENIOR PASTOR OF
VICTORY CHURCH
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IN TULSA, OKLAHOMA.
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HE SHARES HIS PERSONAL
TESTIMONY OF DEALING
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WITH HIS FATHER'S DEATH,
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TAKING OVER THE CHURCH
AT A YOUNG AGE,
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AND HOW HE
RECEIVED FREEDOM
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FROM MENTAL HEALTH STRUGGLES.
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REBECCA: HEY, GUYS.
00:00:26.866 --> 00:00:28.466
WELCOME BACK TO THE
REBECCA WEISS PODCAST.
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I'M JOINED WITH SOMEONE
THAT I'VE KNOWN HIM,
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I KNOW HIS FAMILY,
AND I'M TALKING ABOUT -
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DO YOU GO BY PASTOR?
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YOU PROBABLY DON'T,
YOU JUST GO BY PAUL.
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YOU CAN CALL ME PAUL.
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PAUL?
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YEAH.
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AND SAY YOUR
LAST NAME FOR ME.
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DAUGHERTY.
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DAUGHERTY. OKAY.
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JUST LIKE PARTY,
BUT DAUGHERTY.
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I'M GLAD I ASKED YOU
THIS BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE
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PEOPLE BOTCH YOUR LAST NAME.
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OH, THEY DO.
THEY'RE LIKE
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THEY'RE LIKE, IS IT DAUGHTRY
OR IS IT DAUGHTERY?
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DAUGHERTY.
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YEAH, LIKE JUST
CALL ME WHATEVER.
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YEAH.
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BUT DAUGHERTY
IS WHAT WE SAY.
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WELL, I HAVE THE LAST NAME
WEISS NOW,
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AND EVERYONE CALLS ME
WEESE, AND I'M LIKE,
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OOH, I DON'T LIKE
THAT AT ALL.
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YEAH. LAMB WAS A LOT EASIER.
00:01:03.600 --> 00:01:04.999
LAMB WAS WAY
EASIER BECAUSE I CAN GO
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LIKE THE ANIMAL AND I
WOULD LIKE - ANYWAYS,
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LET'S GET INTO THE REASON -
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ANYWAYS, I'VE KNOWN
PAUL, HIS FAMILY,
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I MEAN, FOR YEARS.
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I REMEMBER YOUR PARENTS
COMING TO DAYSTAR
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WHEN I WAS LIKE A LITTLE KID.
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COME ON.
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YOU ARE NOW THE SENIOR PASTOR
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OF VICTORY CHURCH
IN TULSA, OKLAHOMA.
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YES, MA'AM.
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RIGHT ACROSS FROM ORAL
ROBERTS UNIVERSITY.
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BUT YOU'VE BEEN SENIOR
PASTOR FOR TEN YEARS NOW.
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YES, MA'AM.
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AND YOU ARE A PK
SO THIS IS LIKE
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A SECOND GENERATION,
PASSING THE BATON.
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KIND OF LIKE YOU.
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YEAH.
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WHICH, HONESTLY, I HAVE
TO SAY IS KUDOS
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TO YOUR FAMILY, TO YOU.
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THAT'S VERY HARD
TO DO THAT
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AND A LOT OF TIMES IT DOES NOT
WORK OUT, UNFORTUNATELY,
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WHEN A - I THINK A LOT
OF TIMES IN MINISTRY
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PARENTS WANT TO HAND IT
DOWN TO THEIR CHILDREN,
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BUT IT DOESN'T
ALWAYS WORK OUT,
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AND SO GOOD JOB TO YOU.
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WELL, TO THEM, LIKE
I HAD REALLY GOOD PARENTS
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WHO WANTED TO HANG OUT
WITH US OUTSIDE OF CHURCH,
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AND INVOLVED US
INTO THE MINISTRY.
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AND I FELT LIKE WHENEVER
I WAS GROWING UP,
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I WAS LIKE, I JUST WANT
TO HELP THEM.
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LIKE, I WANT TO BE
A PART OF THIS.
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I WANT TO BUILD THE
CHURCH WITH THEM.
00:02:07.566 --> 00:02:09.932
WANT TO DO MISSIONS
TRIPS WITH THEM.
00:02:10.032 --> 00:02:13.166
AND SO, YEAH, AND LIKE
THE BOOK THAT I WROTE
00:02:13.266 --> 00:02:14.899
WAS ALL ABOUT THAT JOURNEY.
00:02:14.999 --> 00:02:16.599
BECAUSE I WANTED TO BE
A PART OF IT WITH THEM,
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AND THEN MY DAD SUDDENLY
PASSED OF CANCER
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WHEN I WAS 24.
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WAIT, SO THIS WAS
ALL THE WAY -
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SO THIS BOOK -
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THIS IS MY FIRST BOOK.
00:02:24.799 --> 00:02:27.932
BUT I STARTED WRITING
THIS AFTER MY DAD PASSED.
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ALMOST TEN YEARS IN THE
MAKING THAT BOOK WAS, SO...
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WOW.
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AND IT'S THE STORY
OF LIKE BATTLING
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ALL THE FEELINGS OF SADNESS,
DEPRESSION, LOSS, GRIEF,
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AND THEN MIXTURE
OF ANXIETY
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BECAUSE OUR MINISTRY
STARTED LOSING
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THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE OVERNIGHT
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PEOPLE STARTED
DE-ENROLLING THEIR KIDS
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FROM OUR SCHOOL.
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AND MY DAD HAD BUILT
LIKE THIS BIG LEGACY,
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LIKE A CHURCH, A SCHOOL,
A CAMP, A COLLEGE,
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A DREAM CENTER,
400 EMPLOYEES.
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AND IT WAS LIKE
WHEN HE PASSED,
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IT WAS SUDDEN.
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IT WASN'T EXPECTED.
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THERE WAS NO
TRANSITION PLAN.
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AND I WAS THE
YOUNGEST OF FOUR KIDS,
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BUT I FELT THIS.
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YOU'RE THE YOUNGEST.
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YEAH.
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OH, MY GOODNESS.
00:03:06.066 --> 00:03:06.999
YEAH.
00:03:07.099 --> 00:03:08.600
AND HIS LAST PUBLIC
THING WAS MY WEDDING.
00:03:08.700 --> 00:03:10.866
SO HE HE DOES MY WEDDING,
00:03:10.966 --> 00:03:13.266
AND THEN TWO WEEKS LATER
PASSES AWAY.
00:03:13.366 --> 00:03:15.666
AND I REMEMBER JUST THESE
FEELINGS OF LIKE,
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YOU'RE GOING TO
SERVE YOUR MOM,
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YOU'RE GOING TO SERVE
THIS CHURCH,
00:03:18.832 --> 00:03:20.433
AND ONE DAY YOU'RE
GOING TO PASTOR.
00:03:20.533 --> 00:03:23.300
AND I WAS LIKE, IF THAT
HAPPENS, ONE,
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THAT WOULD HAVE TO BE GOD,
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BECAUSE I'M THE LEAST
LIKELY TO BE PICKED.
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I'M THE YOUNGEST.
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I'M NOT THE - I'M NOT THE,
YOU KNOW, EVERYONE'S CHOICE.
00:03:31.500 --> 00:03:32.666
AND I TOLD MY WIFE
AND SHE WAS LIKE,
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DON'T TELL ANYONE
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BECAUSE WE KNOW WHAT
HAPPENED TO JOSEPH.
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HE GOT SOLD TO EGYPT AND
YOUR SIBLINGS MIGHT
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SELL YOU TO EGYPT.
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I WAS LIKE, OKAY.
00:03:41.133 --> 00:03:41.966
BUT GOD DID IT.
00:03:42.066 --> 00:03:43.666
IT WAS LIKE - AND
IT'S A CRAZY STORY,
00:03:43.766 --> 00:03:45.466
BUT I SHARE IT IN THAT
BOOK,MIND GAMES,
00:03:45.566 --> 00:03:47.699
BECAUSE IT WAS LIKE
MY MOM STEPPED IN
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AS THE INTERIM PASTOR,
00:03:49.099 --> 00:03:52.233
AND THAT WAS A BIG DEAL FOR
HER TO LEAD THE CHURCH
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DURING A VERY, LIKE,
BLEEDING SEASON.
00:03:54.366 --> 00:03:56.666
WE WERE BLEEDING LEFT
AND RIGHT FINANCIALLY,
00:03:56.766 --> 00:03:58.333
ATTENDANCE, ALL OF THAT.
00:03:58.433 --> 00:03:59.900
AND DURING THAT TIME,
00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:02.233
IT WAS LIKE WE WERE HAVING
TO TALK ABOUT
00:04:02.333 --> 00:04:03.400
SHUTTING DOWN THINGS,
00:04:03.500 --> 00:04:05.232
LIKE, OH, WE MIGHT HAVE TO
SHUT DOWN THE CAMP.
00:04:05.332 --> 00:04:06.599
WE MIGHT HAVE TO GIVE
AWAY THE DREAM CENTER
00:04:06.699 --> 00:04:07.566
TO ANOTHER CHURCH.
00:04:07.666 --> 00:04:09.199
WE MIGHT HAVE TO SHUT
DOWN THE SCHOOL.
00:04:09.299 --> 00:04:10.399
LIKE, WE COULDN'T
AFFORD THINGS.
00:04:10.499 --> 00:04:12.666
WE WERE LAYING OFF
150 EMPLOYEES
00:04:12.766 --> 00:04:14.466
IN A MATTER OF,
LIKE, A YEAR.
00:04:14.566 --> 00:04:16.166
AND SO IT WAS REALLY HARD.
00:04:16.266 --> 00:04:19.632
AND THEN MY MOM'S LIKE, OH,
YOU'RE GOING TO TAKE OVER NOW.
00:04:19.732 --> 00:04:21.166
AND I REMEMBER
THESE FEELINGS OF,
00:04:21.266 --> 00:04:22.933
LIKE, OH MY GOSH,
I'M INADEQUATE.
00:04:23.033 --> 00:04:24.366
I'M UNWORTHY.
00:04:24.466 --> 00:04:25.699
WE GOTTA TURN
THIS SHIP AROUND.
00:04:25.799 --> 00:04:26.899
I DON'T HAVE WHAT IT TAKES.
00:04:26.999 --> 00:04:28.033
MY DAD WAS A VISIONARY.
00:04:28.133 --> 00:04:29.500
I'M THIS -
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HOW OLD WERE YOU
WHEN SHE PASSED IT TO YOU?
00:04:31.700 --> 00:04:33.800
SHE PASSED IT TO ME
WHEN I WAS 28.
00:04:33.900 --> 00:04:35.199
THAT'S SO YOUNG.
00:04:35.299 --> 00:04:36.266
YEAH, WE HAD ONE KID.
00:04:36.366 --> 00:04:37.532
NOW WE HAVE FIVE KIDS.
00:04:37.632 --> 00:04:38.866
WHICH ARE AMAZING,
BY THE WAY.
00:04:38.966 --> 00:04:39.766
KUDOS TO THE WIFE.
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COME ON.
00:04:40.466 --> 00:04:41.332
KUDOS TO HER.
00:04:41.432 --> 00:04:42.966
SHE'S HOLDING DOWN
THE FORT BACK HOME.
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I LOVE THAT.
00:04:43.766 --> 00:04:44.666
YEAH.
00:04:44.766 --> 00:04:45.699
WE HAVE A TEN-YEAR-OLD,
EIGHT-YEAR-OLD,
00:04:45.799 --> 00:04:48.333
SIX-YEAR-OLD, FOUR-YEAR-OLD,
TWO-YEAR-OLD.
00:04:48.433 --> 00:04:49.299
SO IT'S, WE AT ONE POINT,
00:04:49.399 --> 00:04:50.700
WE HAD FIVE UNDER SEVEN.
00:04:50.800 --> 00:04:52.532
THAT IS INSANE.
00:04:52.632 --> 00:04:55.600
AND TWO DOGS AND, LIKE,
WE LIVE OUT IN THE COUNTRY.
00:04:55.700 --> 00:04:58.133
SO WE'RE JUST CHASING
LIZARDS AND SNAKES
00:04:58.233 --> 00:04:59.033
AND CHICKENS.
00:04:59.133 --> 00:05:00.699
YOU KNOW, ALL
THAT FUN STUFF SO...
00:05:00.799 --> 00:05:02.999
BUT IT'S, I MEAN, IT'S
BEEN A JOURNEY,
00:05:03.099 --> 00:05:05.600
LIKE, NOW, TEN YEARS LATER,
BY THE GRACE OF GOD,
00:05:05.700 --> 00:05:07.432
THE CHURCH WAS ABLE
TO BOUNCE BACK
00:05:07.532 --> 00:05:09.566
THE SCHOOL, WE DIDN'T
HAVE TO SHUT DOWN ANYTHING.
00:05:09.666 --> 00:05:10.199
REALLY?
00:05:10.299 --> 00:05:11.266
WE'RE IN A RECORD SEASON
00:05:11.366 --> 00:05:13.500
OF LIKE FINANCIAL,
ATTENDANCE, ALL OF THAT.
00:05:13.600 --> 00:05:14.633
GOD'S BEEN FAITHFUL.
00:05:14.733 --> 00:05:19.333
IT WAS LIKE A CRAZY
JOURNEY OF GOD'S GROWTH.
00:05:19.433 --> 00:05:22.199
AND HEALTHY, SUSTAINABLE
GROWTH, NOT LIKE OVERNIGHT,
00:05:22.299 --> 00:05:23.533
LIKE, ALL OF A SUDDEN WE
GOT, YOU KNOW,
00:05:23.633 --> 00:05:24.966
ALL THESE PEOPLE COMING.
00:05:25.066 --> 00:05:25.966
IT WAS LIKE GOD
JUST GRADUALLY
00:05:26.066 --> 00:05:28.433
STARTED BRINGING
PEOPLE FROM ALL OVER,
00:05:28.533 --> 00:05:29.766
THE NORTH, SOUTH,
EAST AND WEST,
00:05:29.866 --> 00:05:30.766
THAT WERE LIKE
00:05:30.866 --> 00:05:31.933
HEY, WE WANT TO PARTNER
WITH YOU, PAUL,
00:05:32.033 --> 00:05:33.999
WE WANT TO HELP YOU AND WE
WANT TO BUILD THE CHURCH
00:05:34.099 --> 00:05:36.266
AND THE SCHOOL AND THE
CAMP AND THE DREAM CENTER.
00:05:36.366 --> 00:05:37.566
AND NOW WE'VE GOT ANOTHER
DREAM CENTER
00:05:37.666 --> 00:05:41.166
AND SO IT'S LIKE IT'S THE
FAITHFULNESS OF GOD.
00:05:41.266 --> 00:05:42.999
AND I SHARE IN THE STORY,
00:05:43.099 --> 00:05:44.899
THERE WAS A NIGHT WHERE
I WAS SO DEPRESSED,
00:05:44.999 --> 00:05:46.399
I ALMOST TOOK MY LIFE.
00:05:46.499 --> 00:05:48.266
I WAS STANDING
ON A BRIDGE.
00:05:48.366 --> 00:05:50.099
I WAS LOOKING AT THESE
SEMI TRUCKS
00:05:50.199 --> 00:05:51.999
COMING UNDERNEATH THE BRIDGE.
00:05:52.099 --> 00:05:53.366
AND I HEARD THE ENEMY
LAUGHING AT ME.
00:05:53.466 --> 00:05:57.499
THIS WAS 12 YEARS AGO, LIKE,
REALLY HARD WINTER, 2012.
00:05:57.599 --> 00:06:00.066
WE HAD JUST LAID OFF ANOTHER,
LIKE, 40 EMPLOYEES.
00:06:00.166 --> 00:06:01.999
AND IT WAS LIKE, MAN,
00:06:02.099 --> 00:06:03.699
I WAS SO DISCOURAGED.
00:06:03.799 --> 00:06:05.899
I WAS LIKE, I'M GONNA
RUIN MY DAD'S LEGACY,
00:06:05.999 --> 00:06:07.299
LIKE IT'S NOT GOING
TO BE GOOD.
00:06:07.399 --> 00:06:10.199
AND THE DEVIL WAS LIKE,
JUST END YOUR MISERY.
00:06:10.299 --> 00:06:11.433
JUST THROW IT ALL AWAY.
00:06:11.533 --> 00:06:13.432
AND I REMEMBER
THAT NIGHT THINKING,
00:06:13.532 --> 00:06:16.166
I WISH THERE WAS
A PASTOR I COULD CALL
00:06:16.266 --> 00:06:17.766
WHO HAS OPENLY TALKED
ABOUT DEPRESSION,
00:06:17.866 --> 00:06:19.799
WHO'S OPENLY TALKED ABOUT
SUICIDAL THOUGHTS,
00:06:19.899 --> 00:06:22.966
WHO'S OPENLY TALKED
ABOUT PTSD,
00:06:23.066 --> 00:06:25.666
OR JUST THE CONSTANT
RACING THOUGHTS OF
00:06:25.766 --> 00:06:27.833
ANXIETY AND HOPELESSNESS.
00:06:27.933 --> 00:06:29.233
BUT I DIDN'T KNOW ANYONE.
00:06:29.333 --> 00:06:30.499
AND I GREW UP IN
A FAITH CIRCLE
00:06:30.599 --> 00:06:32.732
WHERE EVERYTHING WAS LIKE
FAITH IT 'TIL YOU MAKE IT.
00:06:32.832 --> 00:06:33.833
YEAH.
00:06:33.933 --> 00:06:34.899
IF THERE'S A TORNADO
OUTSIDE WE'RE GOING TO SAY
00:06:34.999 --> 00:06:35.999
HEY, IT'S A PRETTY DAY.
00:06:36.099 --> 00:06:37.033
YEAH.
00:06:37.133 --> 00:06:38.033
IT'S A DAY THE LORD
HAS MADE AND I'M LIKE,
00:06:38.133 --> 00:06:39.533
BUT THERE'S
A TORNADO OUTSIDE.
00:06:39.633 --> 00:06:40.466
LIKE, I'M STRUGGLING.
00:06:40.566 --> 00:06:42.933
YEAH, AND WE
COULDN'T TALK ABOUT IT.
00:06:43.033 --> 00:06:44.499
AND THEN YOU HAD THIS
OTHER SIDE OF THE PENDULUM
00:06:44.599 --> 00:06:46.800
THAT WAS LIKE IT'S
OKAY TO NOT BE OKAY,
00:06:46.900 --> 00:06:48.099
AND IT'S LIKE
THAT'S GREAT,
00:06:48.199 --> 00:06:49.699
BUT I NEED
SOMEONE THAT'S LIKE
00:06:49.799 --> 00:06:51.666
BUT DON'T STAY NOT OKAY,
00:06:51.766 --> 00:06:53.499
LIKE, LET ME
HELP YOU GET BETTER.
00:06:53.599 --> 00:06:54.766
AND SO
THERE WAS THIS SIDE
00:06:54.866 --> 00:06:56.633
THAT WAS LIKE LET'S GLORY
IN OUR GRIEF
00:06:56.733 --> 00:06:57.566
AND OUR DEPRESSION.
00:06:57.666 --> 00:06:58.599
THERE WAS THIS
OTHER SIDE THAT'S LIKE
00:06:58.699 --> 00:06:59.966
LET'S IGNORE IT,
SWEEP IT UNDER THE RUG,
00:07:00.066 --> 00:07:01.533
NEVER TALK ABOUT IT.
00:07:01.633 --> 00:07:03.166
AND I JUST NEEDED
SOMEONE IN THE MIDDLE
00:07:03.266 --> 00:07:04.466
THAT WAS LIKE,
WE'RE GOING TO ADMIT
00:07:04.566 --> 00:07:06.866
THAT LIFE IS REALLY PAINFUL
00:07:06.966 --> 00:07:09.400
AND PRAYERS DON'T
ALWAYS GET ANSWERED.
00:07:09.500 --> 00:07:11.933
AND GOD'S STILL THE HEALER,
BUT SOMETIMES HE DOESN'T HEAL.
00:07:12.033 --> 00:07:13.799
BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN
HE'S NOT THE HEALER.
00:07:13.899 --> 00:07:15.166
AND WE'RE NOT GOING
TO CAMP OUT
00:07:15.266 --> 00:07:16.799
IN THIS PLACE OF
DEFEAT AND DEPRESSION
00:07:16.899 --> 00:07:18.732
AND GIVE INTO THESE
LIES OF THE ENEMY,
00:07:18.832 --> 00:07:19.633
THAT YOU HAVE TO THROW IT AWAY
00:07:19.733 --> 00:07:21.200
AND IT'S NEVER
GOING TO GET BETTER.
00:07:21.300 --> 00:07:23.366
AND IT WAS LIKE SOMEWHERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF THAT NIGHT,
00:07:23.466 --> 00:07:24.666
I WAS STANDING
ON THAT BRIDGE
00:07:24.766 --> 00:07:27.000
AND I FELT THE LORD LIKE
LITERALLY REMIND ME,
00:07:27.100 --> 00:07:28.366
THE BIBLE SAYS WE'RE
SURROUNDED BY
00:07:28.466 --> 00:07:29.799
A GREAT CLOUD OF WITNESSES.
00:07:29.899 --> 00:07:31.499
AND I COULD ALMOST
FEEL LIKE MY DAD
00:07:31.599 --> 00:07:33.299
WAS UP THERE LOOKING
DOWN ON ME
00:07:33.399 --> 00:07:35.900
SAYING LIKE, PAUL,
DON'T GIVE UP.
00:07:36.000 --> 00:07:38.033
AND I COULD ALMOST
FEEL LIKE IT WAS LIKE
00:07:38.133 --> 00:07:40.399
HIM AND ORAL ROBERTS,
AND LESTER SUMMRALL,
00:07:40.499 --> 00:07:41.766
AND BILLY GRAHAM,
00:07:41.866 --> 00:07:43.233
AND, YOU KNOW, WHOEVER
ELSE WAS UP THERE.
00:07:43.333 --> 00:07:44.800
BUT IT WAS LIKE DON'T
DON'T GIVE UP.
00:07:44.900 --> 00:07:46.333
DON'T THROW IN THE TOWEL.
00:07:46.433 --> 00:07:47.966
AND, YOU KNOW,
THE BIBLE SAYS
00:07:48.066 --> 00:07:49.232
PARENTS, TRAIN YOUR
CHILDREN UP
00:07:49.332 --> 00:07:51.432
IN THE WAY THEY SHOULD GO
AND THEY'LL NOT DEPART FROM IT.
00:07:51.532 --> 00:07:53.133
THAT NIGHT THERE WAS
A SCRIPTURE
00:07:53.233 --> 00:07:54.300
THAT CAME BACK
TO MY MIND
00:07:54.400 --> 00:07:55.966
THAT I HADN'T THOUGHT ABOUT
SINCE I WAS A KID,
00:07:56.033 --> 00:07:57.633
AND IT WAS A SCRIPTURE MY
PARENTS USED TO MAKE US
00:07:57.733 --> 00:07:59.732
CONFESS AS KIDS.
00:07:59.832 --> 00:08:01.866
AND THE SCRIPTURE WAS I
WILL LIVE AND NOT DIE
00:08:01.966 --> 00:08:03.366
AND DECLARE THE
WORKS OF THE LORD.
00:08:03.466 --> 00:08:04.866
AND SO I JUST POINTED
IN THE DARKNESS.
00:08:04.966 --> 00:08:08.399
IT WAS LIKE MIDNIGHT AND
I HAD BEEN ALL ALONE,
00:08:08.499 --> 00:08:09.366
WHICH IS TERRIBLE.
00:08:09.466 --> 00:08:10.499
I TALK ABOUT IT IN THE BOOK.
00:08:10.599 --> 00:08:12.133
THE ENEMY WANTS TO ISOLATE
US IN OUR DEPRESSION,
00:08:12.233 --> 00:08:14.266
GET US ALL ALONE THINKING
WE'RE THE ONLY ONES
00:08:14.366 --> 00:08:15.866
DEALING WITH THIS.
00:08:15.966 --> 00:08:17.533
BUT I POINTED IN THE
DARKNESS AND I WAS LIKE,
00:08:17.633 --> 00:08:19.532
SATAN, I REBUKE YOU.
00:08:19.632 --> 00:08:21.799
I CHOOSE TO LIVE AND NOT
DIE AND DECLARE THE WORKS
00:08:21.899 --> 00:08:22.933
OF THE LORD.
00:08:23.033 --> 00:08:24.566
AND I JUST KEPT SAYING IT
AS TEARS ARE COMING
00:08:24.666 --> 00:08:26.966
DOWN MY CHEEKS AND I BACKED
AWAY FROM THE BRIDGE
00:08:27.066 --> 00:08:28.233
AND I NEVER WENT BACK.
00:08:28.333 --> 00:08:29.799
NEVER HAD ANOTHER
SUICIDAL THOUGHT.
00:08:29.899 --> 00:08:30.533
AMEN.
00:08:30.633 --> 00:08:31.399
YES.
00:08:31.499 --> 00:08:32.566
BUT IT WAS A JOURNEY.
00:08:32.666 --> 00:08:34.833
AFTER THAT, I SIGNED UP FOR
THERAPY AND COUNSELING
00:08:34.933 --> 00:08:37.066
AND AT FIRST MY MOM WAS LIKE
00:08:37.166 --> 00:08:38.866
WE DON'T GO TO COUNSELORS,
LIKE WE'RE, YOU KNOW,
00:08:38.966 --> 00:08:39.899
WE'RE PEOPLE OF FAITH.
00:08:39.999 --> 00:08:41.533
I WAS LIKE, NO, WE'RE
GOING TO COUNSELING.
00:08:41.633 --> 00:08:44.232
AND I STARTED LIKE - NOW,
EVERYONE IN OUR CHURCH
00:08:44.332 --> 00:08:46.366
LIKE EMBRACES THAT COUNSELING
IS NOT A BAD THING.
00:08:46.466 --> 00:08:48.999
IT'S NOT AN ADMISSION OF
LIKE YOU'RE MESSED UP.
00:08:49.099 --> 00:08:50.766
IT'S ACTUALLY A SIGN
OF STRENGTH,
00:08:50.866 --> 00:08:52.532
LIKE GO GET SOME HELP, GO.
00:08:52.632 --> 00:08:54.199
AND SO I TALK ABOUT
IN THE BOOK
00:08:54.299 --> 00:08:56.733
JUST THAT MIXTURE OF WHAT
GOD OFFERS TO HELP US
00:08:56.833 --> 00:09:00.966
WALK IN VICTORY OVER
DEPRESSION, OVER ANXIETY,
00:09:01.066 --> 00:09:03.966
OVER ALL THE DIFFERENT MIND
GAMES THE ENEMY PLAYS WITH US.
00:09:04.066 --> 00:09:05.233
BUT THAT'S
THAT'S MY STORY.
00:09:05.333 --> 00:09:06.666
IT'S A LITTLE BIT
OF MY JOURNEY.
00:09:06.766 --> 00:09:07.933
THAT'S SO GOOD.
00:09:08.033 --> 00:09:10.132
AND THE THING
ABOUT COUNSELING IS
00:09:10.232 --> 00:09:13.099
BECAUSE NOW EVERYONE'S
TALKING ABOUT THERAPY.
00:09:13.199 --> 00:09:14.566
THE PENDULUM HAS ONCE AGAIN
SWUNG THE OTHER WAY.
00:09:14.666 --> 00:09:15.599
IT'S SWUNG TO THE OTHER
SIDE SO NOW IT'S
00:09:15.699 --> 00:09:17.332
A LITTLE BIT OVERBOARD.
00:09:17.432 --> 00:09:18.933
IT'S LIKE, ALL RIGHT, COME
BACK TO THE WORD OF GOD, TOO.
00:09:19.033 --> 00:09:21.999
EXACTLY. AND I THINK
IN THE BODY OF CHRIST,
00:09:22.099 --> 00:09:24.966
I THINK COUNSELING IS
SOMETHING THAT EVERYONE
00:09:25.066 --> 00:09:27.000
SHOULD EMBRACE.
00:09:27.100 --> 00:09:28.199
BUT I THINK THERE
NEEDS TO BE WISDOM
00:09:28.299 --> 00:09:30.332
IN HOW YOU HANDLE IT,
AND I THINK IT'S EXACTLY,
00:09:30.432 --> 00:09:31.766
IT'S LIKE YOU CAN BE
A PERSON OF FAITH,
00:09:31.866 --> 00:09:33.299
BUT YOU HAVE TO PROCESS.
00:09:33.399 --> 00:09:34.699
AND YOU HAD GONE THROUGH
00:09:34.799 --> 00:09:36.132
SOMETHING REALLY TRAUMATIC.
00:09:36.232 --> 00:09:37.833
AND NOT JUST THE DIFFICULTY OF
00:09:37.933 --> 00:09:38.932
LOSING YOUR FATHER,
00:09:39.032 --> 00:09:41.400
BUT THE DIFFICULTY
OF THAT TRANSITION.
00:09:41.500 --> 00:09:42.866
AND IT'S SO CRAZY
LISTENING TO YOUR STORY
00:09:42.966 --> 00:09:44.732
BECAUSE I RELATE
SO MUCH TO YOUR STORY
00:09:44.832 --> 00:09:46.766
BECAUSE IT'S LIKE
WE HAD SIMILAR SITUATIONS
00:09:46.866 --> 00:09:48.199
WHERE MY DAD WENT SUDDENLY,
00:09:48.299 --> 00:09:50.399
THERE WASN'T REALLY A
TRANSITION PLAN IN PLACE.
00:09:50.499 --> 00:09:53.233
AND WHEN MY DAD WENT,
KIND OF LIKE YOUR DAD,
00:09:53.333 --> 00:09:55.766
IT AFFECTED BOTH MY
PERSONAL LIFE,
00:09:55.866 --> 00:09:57.299
MY SPIRITUAL LIFE,
00:09:57.399 --> 00:09:58.532
MY PROFESSIONAL LIFE.
00:09:58.632 --> 00:10:00.466
LIKE, IT AFFECTED
EVERY SPHERE.
00:10:00.566 --> 00:10:02.899
AND SO IT WAS THIS
MASSIVE LIKE, YOU KNOW,
00:10:02.999 --> 00:10:05.432
YOU THINK ABOUT THOSE
PLATES IN THE EARTH,
00:10:05.532 --> 00:10:07.366
LIKE WHEN THEY SHIFT,
IT CAUSES AN EARTHQUAKE.
00:10:07.466 --> 00:10:08.366
IT WAS LIKE THAT
KIND OF SHIFT.
00:10:08.466 --> 00:10:09.899
IT WAS HUGE.
00:10:09.999 --> 00:10:14.600
HOW DID YOU HANDLE NOT
ONLY LOSING YOUR FATHER,
00:10:14.700 --> 00:10:17.766
BUT THEN WALKING INTO THE
ROLE OF SENIOR PASTOR?
00:10:17.866 --> 00:10:19.132
WHAT KEPT YOU GROUNDED?
00:10:19.232 --> 00:10:20.166
YEAH.
00:10:20.266 --> 00:10:22.666
THE PLATE SHAKING
REMINDS ME OFINSIDE OUT,
00:10:22.766 --> 00:10:25.866
WHEN HER WORLD STARTS LIKE
CRASHING DOWN ONE BY ONE.
00:10:25.966 --> 00:10:28.033
I SAW THE TRAILER FOR THE
NEWINSIDE OUT MOVIE
00:10:28.133 --> 00:10:29.799
AND STARTED CRYING.
00:10:29.899 --> 00:10:32.466
AND ASHLEY MY WIFE
WAS LIKE, WHAT'S GOING ON?
00:10:32.566 --> 00:10:34.033
I WAS LIKE, LISTEN,
I KNOW I'M GOING TO WEEP
00:10:34.133 --> 00:10:35.699
DURING THIS MOVIE BECAUSE,
LIKE, THESE CARTOONS,
00:10:35.799 --> 00:10:36.366
THEY GET ME.
00:10:36.466 --> 00:10:37.332
YEAH.
00:10:37.432 --> 00:10:37.933
ESPECIALLY THAT ONE
BECAUSE IT'S LIKE,
00:10:38.033 --> 00:10:39.066
IT'S SO TRUE.
00:10:39.166 --> 00:10:41.266
WE NEED SOMEONE TO
HELP US SEE THE INSIDE
00:10:41.366 --> 00:10:43.266
OF WHAT'S GOING ON
IN OUR EMOTIONS
00:10:43.366 --> 00:10:44.400
AND OUR SUPPRESSED EMOTIONS,
00:10:44.500 --> 00:10:45.266
ALL OF THOSE THINGS.
00:10:45.366 --> 00:10:47.999
AND SO, YEAH,
WHEN MY DAD PASSED
00:10:48.099 --> 00:10:49.566
IT AFFECTED ALL OF THE -
00:10:49.666 --> 00:10:51.866
ALL OF THE CATEGORIES
ON THE INSIDE.
00:10:51.966 --> 00:10:54.466
LIKE YOU SAID, RELATIONSHIPS
WITH MY SISTERS,
00:10:54.566 --> 00:10:56.666
MY BROTHER, MY MOM,
00:10:56.766 --> 00:10:58.599
MY DAD'S ASSOCIATE PASTOR,
00:10:58.699 --> 00:11:01.366
HIS EXECUTIVE TEAM, THE BOARD,
00:11:01.466 --> 00:11:05.699
MY WIFE AND CHURCH
AND DAILY WORK.
00:11:05.799 --> 00:11:08.733
AND JUST MY LONELY TIME, LIKE IT
WAS LIKE EVERYTHING WAS
00:11:08.833 --> 00:11:11.600
SO AFFECTED AND IT WAS
SUCH AN EARTHQUAKE.
00:11:11.700 --> 00:11:14.332
AND, HONESTLY, WHAT
KEPT ME GROUNDED
00:11:14.432 --> 00:11:16.933
WAS DEFINITELY, LIKE, MY
RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS,
00:11:17.033 --> 00:11:18.099
WHICH IS SO CLICH !,
00:11:18.199 --> 00:11:19.166
BUT IT'S SO TRUE.
00:11:19.266 --> 00:11:20.600
NO, IT'S SO TRUE.
00:11:20.700 --> 00:11:21.900
I WOULD GO TO THE -
00:11:22.000 --> 00:11:23.666
HONESTLY, THE GRAVEYARD
IS THE LAST PLACE
00:11:23.766 --> 00:11:25.999
I WOULD FEEL CLOSE TO MY
DAD AND CLOSE TO GOD.
00:11:26.099 --> 00:11:28.166
I WOULD GO TO THE CHURCH
WHEN NO ONE WAS THERE.
00:11:28.266 --> 00:11:30.433
I'D WALK THE HALLWAYS
WHERE HE WALKED.
00:11:30.533 --> 00:11:33.866
I'D WALK AROUND THE CAMPUS AND
AT NIGHTTIME, I STILL DO THIS.
00:11:33.966 --> 00:11:36.999
I WOULD GO UP
TO THE BUILDING
00:11:37.099 --> 00:11:38.666
WHEN NO ONE WAS THERE,
SIT AT THE PIANO, PLAY.
00:11:38.766 --> 00:11:40.666
SCREAM, CRY, TALK TO GOD.
00:11:40.766 --> 00:11:41.866
PROCESS.
00:11:41.966 --> 00:11:43.566
YEAH, AND IT WASN'T JUST
PROCESSING THAT I MISSED HIM,
00:11:43.666 --> 00:11:44.966
IT WAS PROCESSING
00:11:45.066 --> 00:11:46.499
THE RELATIONAL ANGST
00:11:46.599 --> 00:11:48.933
THAT WAS HAPPENING ACROSS
THE BOARD WITH HIM GONE.
00:11:49.033 --> 00:11:52.833
IT WAS LIKE HIM LEAVING
AFFECTED ALL THESE RELATIONSHIPS
00:11:52.933 --> 00:11:54.266
AND WHO WAS GOING TO
STAY IN THE CHURCH,
00:11:54.366 --> 00:11:55.599
WHO WAS GOING TO QUIT,
00:11:55.699 --> 00:11:57.266
WHO WAS GOING TO
MISUNDERSTAND THIS
00:11:57.366 --> 00:11:58.100
AND MISUNDERSTAND -
00:11:58.200 --> 00:11:59.133
IT WAS ALL OF THAT.
00:11:59.233 --> 00:12:00.732
AND SO I WOULD GO UP
TO THE CHURCH, HONESTLY,
00:12:00.832 --> 00:12:02.900
TO JUST
LIKE, VENT TO GOD.
00:12:03.000 --> 00:12:05.166
HE WAS MY COUNSELOR
FOR A LONG TIME.
00:12:05.266 --> 00:12:09.233
AND THEN I STARTED FINDING
SOME REALLY HEALTHY MENTORS
00:12:09.333 --> 00:12:11.232
THAT LIKE WOULD
SPEAK INTO MY LIFE,
00:12:11.332 --> 00:12:12.766
LISTEN, GIVE ME
FEEDBACK AND SAY,
00:12:12.866 --> 00:12:14.633
PAUL, WE NEED TO -
WE NEED TO HELP YOU
00:12:14.733 --> 00:12:17.066
HEAL FROM THAT,
LIKE YOU NEED TO -
00:12:17.166 --> 00:12:18.199
YOU NEED TO
FORGIVE YOURSELF.
00:12:18.299 --> 00:12:19.399
YOU NEED TO
FORGIVE YOUR DAD.
00:12:19.499 --> 00:12:20.432
FORGIVE YOUR MOM.
00:12:20.532 --> 00:12:22.566
YOU NEED TO LIKE - AND
THAT WAS HEALTHY.
00:12:22.666 --> 00:12:26.299
SO ALL OF THAT HELPED
KEEP ME GROUNDED.
00:12:26.399 --> 00:12:28.632
AND THEN I WOULD SEE
PEOPLE THAT I KNEW
00:12:28.732 --> 00:12:31.900
THAT WEREN'T DOING GOOD WHO HAD
WALKED THROUGH LOSS,
00:12:32.000 --> 00:12:33.566
AND THAT HAD KIND OF
00:12:33.666 --> 00:12:35.633
JUST THROWN
EVERYTHING AWAY.
00:12:35.733 --> 00:12:36.499
AND I WAS LIKE, OKAY,
00:12:36.599 --> 00:12:37.866
I DON'T WANT TO
END UP LIKE THAT,
00:12:37.966 --> 00:12:39.666
BECAUSE THERE'S
NO JOY IN THAT,
00:12:39.766 --> 00:12:40.699
LIKE I NEED TO
FIGURE OUT A WAY
00:12:40.799 --> 00:12:43.499
TO NOT GO DOWN
THAT PATH.
00:12:43.599 --> 00:12:44.999
AND SO I JUST KEPT
REMINDING MYSELF
00:12:45.099 --> 00:12:46.699
THERE'S A REASON
TO GET UP.
00:12:46.799 --> 00:12:49.032
THERE'S A REASON TO FIGHT
FOR MENTAL HEALTH,
00:12:49.132 --> 00:12:50.566
TO FIGHT FOR EMOTIONAL HEALTH,
00:12:50.666 --> 00:12:52.999
TO FIGHT FOR SPIRITUAL HEALTH.
00:12:53.099 --> 00:12:54.233
YEAH.
00:12:54.333 --> 00:12:57.099
AND SO THAT WAS KIND OF
LIKE MY MOTIVATION EVERY DAY,
00:12:57.199 --> 00:12:59.699
WAS LIKE DON'T -
DON'T THROW IT ALL AWAY.
00:12:59.799 --> 00:13:01.833
BECAUSE THERE'S NO JOY
IN THAT JOURNEY.
00:13:01.933 --> 00:13:03.099
AND THE HEALTH OF YOUR SOUL
00:13:03.199 --> 00:13:04.333
NOT ONLY
WOULD AFFECT YOU,
00:13:04.433 --> 00:13:06.833
IT WOULD AFFECT YOUR
FAMILY, YOUR MARRIAGE,
00:13:06.933 --> 00:13:08.199
YOUR MINISTRY.
00:13:08.299 --> 00:13:10.633
AND SO IT - BUT I THINK
THAT WAS SUCH A GOOD WORD
00:13:10.733 --> 00:13:13.633
WHEN YOU WERE SAYING THAT YOU
CHOSE TO PERSEVERE
00:13:13.733 --> 00:13:15.533
AND I THINK THAT'S
ANOTHER WORD, IS THAT SOMETIMES
00:13:15.633 --> 00:13:17.200
YOU HAVE TO JUST
KEEP GOING
00:13:17.300 --> 00:13:18.633
EVEN THOUGH DAY AFTER DAY
00:13:18.733 --> 00:13:20.833
YOU DON'T - THINGS DON'T
SEEM TO BE GETTING BETTER.
00:13:20.933 --> 00:13:22.366
YOU CONTINUE TO PERSEVERE
00:13:22.466 --> 00:13:23.933
KNOWING THAT GOD IS FAITHFUL
00:13:24.033 --> 00:13:24.966
AND YOU'RE GOING
TO DO THE WORK TO
00:13:25.066 --> 00:13:26.866
WORK THROUGH AND
PROCESS AND HEAL
00:13:27.033 --> 00:13:28.233
KNOWING THAT YOU'RE
GOING TO COME OUT
00:13:28.333 --> 00:13:31.399
THE OTHER SIDE OF THIS SEASON
AND IT'S GOING TO BE BETTER.
00:13:31.499 --> 00:13:33.699
I REMEMBER WHEN
MY DAD PASSED,
00:13:33.799 --> 00:13:35.666
I WAS JUST -
I JUST KIND OF -
00:13:35.766 --> 00:13:38.266
THERE WAS LIKE THIS HOPELESSNESS
THAT I STRUGGLED WITH.
00:13:38.366 --> 00:13:40.366
AND THEN I STRUGGLED WITH
FEELING LIKE
00:13:40.466 --> 00:13:43.566
IS THERE ANYTHING GOOD IN THE
FUTURE, WHICH I DON'T KNOW WHY,
00:13:43.666 --> 00:13:45.533
BECAUSE I HAD SO MANY
GREAT THINGS IN MY LIFE.
00:13:45.633 --> 00:13:48.933
AND I REMEMBER ONE DAY
I WAS WALKING
00:13:49.033 --> 00:13:51.033
AND I COULD JUST,
LIKE IT WAS
00:13:51.133 --> 00:13:52.166
REALLY BEAUTIFUL OUTSIDE.
00:13:52.266 --> 00:13:54.999
IT WAS FALL IN TEXAS.
00:13:55.099 --> 00:13:56.900
I REMEMBER IT WAS
REALLY BEAUTIFUL.
00:13:57.000 --> 00:14:00.000
AND I JUST HEARD
THE LORD SAY LIKE -
00:14:00.100 --> 00:14:01.333
OH, MAN, I KNEW WHEN
YOU WERE COMING,
00:14:01.433 --> 00:14:03.499
I WAS LIKE I DON'T WANT TO
TALK ABOUT MY DAD AND CRY.
00:14:03.599 --> 00:14:05.133
I'M SORRY.
00:14:05.233 --> 00:14:06.399
BUT I REMEMBER JUST
STRUGGLING WITH THIS
00:14:06.499 --> 00:14:08.999
FEELING OF HOPELESSNESS
AND KIND OF THINKING LIKE,
00:14:09.099 --> 00:14:10.800
WHAT IS IN MY FUTURE,
00:14:10.900 --> 00:14:12.766
AND I REALLY HAD A MOMENT
WHERE I WAS THINKING
00:14:12.866 --> 00:14:16.599
THERE IS NO GOOD IN MY
FUTURE, WHICH IS CRAZY
00:14:16.699 --> 00:14:18.132
BECAUSE I HAVE AN
INCREDIBLE HUSBAND,
00:14:18.232 --> 00:14:19.799
I HAVE GREAT KIDS.
00:14:19.899 --> 00:14:21.333
AND I REMEMBER AS
I WAS WALKING OUTSIDE,
00:14:21.433 --> 00:14:22.533
IT WAS REALLY BEAUTIFUL.
00:14:22.633 --> 00:14:26.866
THE LEAVES WERE FALLING,
THE WIND WAS MAKING THEM FLOW,
00:14:26.966 --> 00:14:27.766
FLOW IN THE WIND.
00:14:27.866 --> 00:14:29.333
AND I REMEMBER
THE LORD SPOKE TO ME
00:14:29.433 --> 00:14:30.233
AND I REMEMBER THINKING,
00:14:30.333 --> 00:14:31.133
WOW, IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL.
00:14:31.233 --> 00:14:32.232
AND THE LORD SPOKE
TO ME AND HE SAID
00:14:32.332 --> 00:14:34.066
THERE ARE GOOD THINGS
FOR YOU IN YOUR FUTURE.
00:14:34.166 --> 00:14:35.432
KEEP GOING.
00:14:35.532 --> 00:14:38.433
AND SO THAT'S
WHAT I HAD TO DO.
00:14:38.533 --> 00:14:41.466
AND I THINK THIS IS
SUCH A GREAT BOOK
00:14:41.566 --> 00:14:44.166
BECAUSE THE TRUTH OF
THE MATTER IS,
00:14:44.266 --> 00:14:46.500
YOU'RE GOING TO GO
THROUGH DIFFICULT STUFF,
00:14:46.600 --> 00:14:47.733
ALL OF US ARE.
00:14:47.833 --> 00:14:49.333
WHETHER IT'S LOSING SOMEONE,
00:14:49.433 --> 00:14:51.132
WHICH WE'LL ALL LOSE
SOMEONE EVENTUALLY.
00:14:51.232 --> 00:14:52.699
YEAH.
00:14:52.799 --> 00:14:55.233
TRANSITION, ALL THE
THINGS YOU TALK ABOUT,
00:14:55.333 --> 00:14:58.832
AND SO THIS IS GREAT
THAT YOU WROTE THIS BOOK.
00:14:58.932 --> 00:15:02.866
THIS IS THE BOOK,
MIND GAMES,
00:15:02.966 --> 00:15:04.599
AND A
TEN-YEAR-IN-THE-MAKING PROCESS,
00:15:04.699 --> 00:15:06.133
WHICH IS KIND OF BEAUTIFUL
BECAUSE A LOT OF TIMES
00:15:06.233 --> 00:15:09.199
WHEN PEOPLE MAKE BOOKS,
THEY POP THEM OUT REAL QUICK.
00:15:09.299 --> 00:15:11.933
BUT THIS REALLY IS
KIND OF A WHOLE SUMMATION
00:15:12.033 --> 00:15:14.166
OF THAT JOURNEY,
THAT TRANSITION,
00:15:14.266 --> 00:15:16.333
AND HOW GOD HAS BEEN
FAITHFUL AND HAS BROUGHT YOU
00:15:16.433 --> 00:15:17.466
TO WHERE YOU ARE NOW.
00:15:17.566 --> 00:15:19.733
AND YOU CAN SAY NOT
ONLY DID I GO THROUGH THIS,
00:15:19.833 --> 00:15:21.166
BUT GOD HAS BROUGHT
ME HERE TODAY
00:15:21.266 --> 00:15:25.366
AND I'VE MADE IT THROUGH,
SO THIS IS BEAUTIFUL.
00:15:25.466 --> 00:15:26.433
I THINK
THE LAST THING
00:15:26.533 --> 00:15:30.133
I JUST WANT YOU TO SAY IS
JUST FINAL COMMENTS
00:15:30.233 --> 00:15:33.833
AND ALSO PITCH -
WHERE CAN THEY GET THIS?
00:15:33.933 --> 00:15:34.900
YEAH, TOTALLY.
00:15:35.000 --> 00:15:36.066
WELL, THE BOOK IS
AVAILABLE ANYWHERE
00:15:36.166 --> 00:15:38.699
BOOKS ARE SOLD, IN
AMAZON BOOKS, AUDIBLE.
00:15:38.799 --> 00:15:40.066
I READ THE BOOK
TO YOU ON AUDIBLE
00:15:40.166 --> 00:15:41.999
AND I ADD SOME OF
MY OWN COMMENTARY.
00:15:42.099 --> 00:15:45.133
I HAVE A CHAPTER ON THERE,
SO AFTER I WROTE THE,
00:15:45.233 --> 00:15:47.100
LIKE, AFTER I WENT
THROUGH ALL THAT I DID
00:15:47.200 --> 00:15:48.333
AND CHOSE TO FIGHT,
00:15:48.433 --> 00:15:50.666
I ALSO SHARE STORIES
FROM THE FIGHT
00:15:50.766 --> 00:15:51.899
SINCE BEING PASTOR.
00:15:51.999 --> 00:15:53.133
AND ONE CHAPTER IS
ALL ABOUT
00:15:53.233 --> 00:15:56.099
MY RELATIONSHIP WITH
ANOTHER PASTOR IN TOWN,
00:15:56.199 --> 00:15:59.766
WHOSE CHURCH BLEW UP REAL
BIG, AND THAT'S MIKE TODD.
00:15:59.866 --> 00:16:02.066
AND SO ME AND MIKE
KNEW EACH OTHER
00:16:02.166 --> 00:16:03.332
SINCE WE WERE TEENAGERS,
00:16:03.432 --> 00:16:06.032
AND HE TOOK OVER HIS CHURCH
AROUND THE SAME TIME,
00:16:06.132 --> 00:16:07.066
BUT I HAVE A WHOLE
CHAPTER ABOUT
00:16:07.166 --> 00:16:10.499
COMPARISON, ENVY
AND THEN CONTENTMENT.
00:16:10.599 --> 00:16:11.699
AND SO, YOU KNOW,
00:16:11.799 --> 00:16:13.699
I KNOW YOU GUYS HAVE
HAD MIKE ON HERE,
00:16:13.799 --> 00:16:15.600
BUT MIKE AND I,
IT'S SO INTERESTING,
00:16:15.700 --> 00:16:17.166
BECAUSE I LOOK AT THAT
BOOK AND I'M LIKE,
00:16:17.266 --> 00:16:19.066
IT'S TEN YEARS IN
THE MAKING,
00:16:19.166 --> 00:16:21.100
BUT IT'S ALSO
THE REST OF MY LIFE.
00:16:21.200 --> 00:16:22.632
I THINK WE'LL ALWAYS
HAVE MIND GAMES,
00:16:22.732 --> 00:16:25.232
WHETHER THOSE MIND GAMES
COME FROM GRIEF, LOSS,
00:16:25.332 --> 00:16:28.466
COMPARISON, JEALOUSY,
ANGER,
00:16:28.566 --> 00:16:32.066
FEAR ABOUT LIKE RAISING KIDS
IN THIS CRAZY WORLD,
00:16:32.166 --> 00:16:35.299
BUT ALL OF THE MIND
GAMES THAT HAPPENED
00:16:35.399 --> 00:16:37.266
IN MY JOURNEY THAT
I WRITE IN THAT BOOK
00:16:37.366 --> 00:16:38.633
ARE TEN YEARS IN THE MAKING.
00:16:38.733 --> 00:16:39.900
AND THEN I'M LIKE, OKAY,
00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:41.600
I GOTTA THINK OF
THIS NEXT BOOK
00:16:41.700 --> 00:16:44.566
BECAUSE THE NEXT BOOK
IS LIKE ALSO
00:16:44.666 --> 00:16:47.100
JUST A CONTINUATION OF WINNING
THE BATTLE FOR THE MIND,
00:16:47.200 --> 00:16:49.632
LIKE WINNING THOSE
LIES OF THE ENEMY
00:16:49.732 --> 00:16:52.866
THAT TRY TO DISTRACT US,
DISCOURAGE US, DEFEAT US,
00:16:52.966 --> 00:16:54.533
MAKE US FEEL LIKE
WE'RE INADEQUATE
00:16:54.633 --> 00:16:56.100
OR WE DON'T
MEASURE UP,
00:16:56.200 --> 00:16:58.199
AND I THINK THAT'S THE
STORY FOR SO MANY PEOPLE.
00:16:58.299 --> 00:17:00.266
AS A PASTOR, I MEET PEOPLE
AT THE ALTAR EVERY WEEK
00:17:00.366 --> 00:17:02.933
THAT ARE LIKE, I LOST
MY DAD, I LOST MY SON,
00:17:03.033 --> 00:17:05.066
I LOST MY WIFE,
I LOST MY HUSBAND.
00:17:05.166 --> 00:17:08.833
OR THEY'RE LIKE I LOST MY JOB,
OR MY SPOUSE LEFT ME,
00:17:08.933 --> 00:17:11.533
OR THIS, AND IT'S LIKE
ALL OF THESE THINGS
00:17:11.633 --> 00:17:14.232
THAT HAPPEN CAN CRIPPLE
PEOPLE IN THEIR MIND
00:17:14.332 --> 00:17:15.866
BECAUSE THEY'RE LIKE,
I DON'T WANT TO START OVER,
00:17:15.966 --> 00:17:16.666
THERE'S NO HOPE,
00:17:16.766 --> 00:17:18.266
MY BEST DAYS
ARE BEHIND ME,
00:17:18.366 --> 00:17:19.366
GOD'S FINISHED WITH ME,
00:17:19.466 --> 00:17:22.066
I FAILED, I MESSED UP,
WHATEVER IT IS.
00:17:22.166 --> 00:17:23.099
AND THIS BOOK, I THINK,
00:17:23.199 --> 00:17:25.166
IS JUST A REMINDER,
LIKE, GOD'S NOT DONE.
00:17:25.266 --> 00:17:26.066
YEAH.
00:17:26.166 --> 00:17:28.066
YOUR BEST DAYS
ARE NOT BEHIND YOU.
00:17:28.166 --> 00:17:29.566
YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS.
00:17:29.666 --> 00:17:31.633
DON'T THROW IN THE TOWEL.
00:17:31.733 --> 00:17:32.932
WHETHER THAT'S
THROWING IN THE TOWEL
00:17:33.032 --> 00:17:34.999
PHYSICALLY OR MENTALLY,
BECAUSE PEOPLE CAN LIVE
00:17:35.099 --> 00:17:36.500
BUT NOT BE ALIVE.
00:17:36.600 --> 00:17:37.866
AND SO I JUST
ENCOURAGE PEOPLE
00:17:37.966 --> 00:17:40.033
AS THEY'RE THINKING ABOUT
WHETHER IT'S THIS BOOK
00:17:40.133 --> 00:17:42.433
OR ANYTHING ON
WINNING IN THE MIND,
00:17:42.533 --> 00:17:44.099
THE MIND IS SO IMPORTANT.
00:17:44.199 --> 00:17:45.866
AND I THINK WE HAVE
TO PAY MORE ATTENTION
00:17:45.966 --> 00:17:47.333
TO WHAT WE'RE
PAYING ATTENTION TO
00:17:47.433 --> 00:17:48.666
ON THE INSIDE
00:17:48.766 --> 00:17:50.533
SO THAT WE CAN
WIN ON THE OUTSIDE.
00:17:50.633 --> 00:17:51.632
THAT'S SO GOOD.
00:17:51.732 --> 00:17:53.099
WELL, PAUL, THANK YOU
SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE.
00:17:53.199 --> 00:17:54.400
LIKE HE SAID, YOU
CAN GET HIS BOOK,
00:17:54.500 --> 00:17:55.533
MIND GAMES,
00:17:55.633 --> 00:17:57.699
ON AMAZON OR WHEREVER
BOOKS ARE SOLD.
00:17:57.799 --> 00:17:59.200
AND I JUST WANT TO
SAY THANK YOU
00:17:59.300 --> 00:18:01.399
FOR LISTENING TO
THE REBECCA WEISS PODCAST.