REBECCA LAMB WEISS: HEY, GUYS,
WELCOME TO THE REBECCA WEISS PODCAST.
I'M VERY EXCITED TODAY
BECAUSE WE HAVE AUTHOR AND PASTOR
OF HUNGRYGEN CHURCH,
VLADIMIR SAVCHUK HERE.
I AM SO EXCITED TO HAVE YOU HERE.
THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE TODAY.
VLADIMIR SAVCHUK: THANK YOU, REBECCA.
I'M GLAD TO BE HERE
AND FINALLY GET A CHANCE TO BE ON YOUR PODCAST.
REBECCA: I KNOW.
YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN FOLLOWING YOU,
I LOVE YOUR CONTENT, I LOVE YOUR MINISTRY,
SO I'M HONORED TO HAVE YOU HERE.
VLADIMIR: I'M HONORED TO BE HERE AS WELL.
AND TO SEE THE WHOLE DAYSTAR
AND THEN WATCHING FROM A DISTANCE,
AND NOW HAVING A CHANCE TO MEET YOUR PARENTS
AND THE WHOLE CREW, IT'S INCREDIBLE.
REBECCA: THAT'S AWESOME.
SO FOR PEOPLE WHO MIGHT NOT KNOW YOUR STORY,
WHY DON'T YOU SHARE YOUR -
ACTUALLY NOT EVEN JUST YOUR TESTIMONY,
YOUR TESTIMONY IS GENERATIONAL.
VLADIMIR: UH-HUH.
REBECCA: SO LET'S GO BACK TO YOUR GREAT GRANDFATHER.
VLADIMIR: SO HIS NAME WAS PHILIP.
HE CAME TO KNOW THE LORD,
AND SHORTLY AFTER THAT,
TO GATHER TOGETHER AS CHRISTIANS
AND TO PREACH THE GOSPEL,
IT WAS ILLEGAL IN THE FORMER SOVIET UNION.
SO HE GETS ARRESTED AND GETS SENTENCED TO TEN YEARS,
BUT HE GETS RELEASED AFTER FIVE YEARS
OF SERVING HIS SENTENCE.
AND SHORTLY AFTER THAT, HIM AND HIS BEST FRIEND
WERE WALKING OUT OF THE VILLAGE
AND THE COMMUNIST COMMANDERS
WERE RIDING ON THIS CARRIAGE.
THEY FORCED HIM TO GET ON THE CARRIAGE.
AS HE WAS ON IT, OF COURSE THEIR PLAN WAS TO HURT HIM.
SO THEY STARTED TO BEAT HIM AND HIS FRIEND.
HIS FRIEND QUICKLY JUMPED OUT AND ESCAPED.
AND MY GREAT GRANDFATHER WAS JUMPING OUT
AND HIS FOOT GOT STUCK
BETWEEN THE WOODEN PLANKS OF THE CARRIAGE,
AND HIS BODY DANGLING ON THE GROUND,
YOU KNOW, HITTING THAT PAVEMENT,
AS THE HORSES WERE RIDING EVEN FASTER.
AND SO THESE COMMANDERS WERE JUST BEATING HIM
FOR THE NEXT 40 MINUTES
UNTIL THEY ALREADY SAW -
THEY ACTUALLY THOUGHT HE WAS DEAD.
HE JUST WENT UNCONSCIOUS,
AND SHORTLY AFTER THAT,
HE SUFFERED IRREVERSIBLE BRAIN DAMAGE
AND THEN HE DIED.
REBECCA: SO HE WAS A MARTYR.
VLADIMIR: HE WAS A MARTYR, YEAH.
AND THEN MY GRANDMA TOLD ME THIS STORY
AND MY GRANDMA IS STILL ALIVE.
SHE HAS 16 KIDS.
REBECCA: WHAT?
VLADIMIR: AND SHE REALLY HAD TO,
THEY HAD TO GROW UP, YOU KNOW,
AS PRETTY MUCH WITHOUT THEIR FATHER.
AND THEN WHEN SHE HAD HER CHILDREN,
YOU KNOW, THEY WERE GOING THROUGH PERSECUTION
DURING THAT TIME.
SO SHE TOLD ME A LOT OF THE STORIES,
BECAUSE I'VE HEARD STORIES JUST FROM THE MEDIA,
BOOKS AND PREACHERS,
BUT HEARING THAT FROM MY GRANDMA
WHO IS STILL ALIVE,
AND HOW THEY HAD TO SURVIVE,
HOW THEY HAD TO LEARN TO TRUST GOD,
HOW THEY HAD TO SWITCH THEIR CHURCH SERVICES
FIVE TO TEN MINUTES BEFORE
SO THAT THE KGB COULDN'T CATCH UP WITH THEM
BECAUSE THERE WAS CONSTANTLY SECRET AGENTS
THAT WERE MONITORING THEM.
YOU KNOW, AND, REBECCA, WHAT I FIND INTERESTING
IS THAT COMMUNISM HAD A VERY SIMILAR STRATEGY
TO WHAT IS HAPPENING IN OUR CULTURE TODAY.
THEY DIDN'T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH YOU
BELIEVING IN GOD IN YOUR HEART.
THEY JUST HAD A PROBLEM WITH YOU TALKING ABOUT IT,
AND THEY HAD A PROBLEM WITH YOU ASSEMBLING.
SO AS LONG AS YOU BELIEVE IN YOUR HEART
BUT DON'T TELL ANYBODY.
SO THAT IS HOW I CAME ABOUT.
THAT'S FROM MY MOTHER'S SIDE.
FROM MY FATHER'S SIDE,
MY FATHER, HIS DAD, MY GRANDFATHER,
HIS NAME IS IVAN.
AND HE HAD LEPROSY.
AND WHEN AMERICAN MISSIONARIES
CAME TO THE VILLAGE,
THE VILLAGE WAS NOT A CHRISTIAN VILLAGE.
ATHEISTIC.
TYPICAL COMMUNIST, SOCIALIST,
COMMUNIST ENVIRONMENT.
AND MY GRANDFATHER IVAN HAD LEPROSY,
SO THEY, ONE OF THE THINGS THEY DID IS,
THEY DIDN'T JUST PREACH THE GOSPEL.
IN THOSE PARTS OF THE WORLD,
AND I BELIEVE EVEN IN THIS PART OF THE WORLD
WE NEED THAT MORE,
IS THEY DEMONSTRATED THE GOSPEL.
SO THEY JUST PRAYED FOR THIS KID, IVAN.
AND THIS WAS MY GRANDFATHER.
AND HE GOT HEALED INSTANTLY,
ACCORDING TO MY FATHER.
AND THEN THE WHOLE FAMILY CONVERTED.
AND THEN MY GRANDFATHER ACTUALLY BECAME
A PASTOR IN THAT CITY.
AND I VISITED, WHEN I WAS A KID,
I VISITED THAT CITY.
THE MAJORITY OF THAT, WAS ACTUALLY MORE OF
LIKE A VILLAGE.
THE MAJORITY OF THAT VILLAGE ARE CHRISTIANS NOW.
REBECCA: WOW.
VLADIMIR: SO IT'S SUCH A POWER -
SUCH A POWERFUL TESTAMENT
OF WHAT ONE MIRACLE, LEADING PEOPLE TO JESUS
CAN DO TO TRANSFORM A VILLAGE.
REBECCA: IT JUST SHOWS HOW ONE SMALL SEED, PLANTED,
HOW IT CAN GROW.
VLADIMIR: INDEED.
REBECCA: YEAH.
SO, THAT'S YOUR GREAT GRANDFATHER,
YOUR GRANDFATHER.
NOW WHAT ABOUT YOU?
VLADIMIR: SO I WAS BORN IN THE YEAR 1986,
WHICH FOR THOSE PEOPLE WHO KNOW ANYTHING
ABOUT THAT PART OF THE WORLD,
THEY KNOW THAT THERE'S A BIG EXPLOSION THAT HAPPENED
IN THE FORMER SOVIET UNION.
AND IT WAS THE CHERNOBYL EXPLOSION.
I WAS BORN NOT VERY FAR FROM THERE.
REBECCA: WHICH IS, BY THE WAY, IS CRAZY.
AND FOR PEOPLE WHO DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT WAS,
THAT WAS A NUCLEAR POWER PLANT THAT EXPLODED.
SO RADIATION, WHICH IS EXTREMELY POISONOUS,
GOT EVERYWHERE.
AND IT MADE TONS OF PEOPLE EXTREMELY SICK.
VLADIMIR: A LOT OF PEOPLE DIED.
REBECCA: YEAH.
VLADIMIR: A LOT OF PEOPLE WERE BORN WITH DEFORMITIES.
REBECCA: BIRTH DEFECTS.
VLADIMIR: BIRTH DEFECTS.
THAT'S ONE OF THE COMMON SIGNS
OF THE RADIATION.
I DON'T THINK THAT I WAS -
I DON'T THINK THAT MY BIRTH WAS AFFECTED
NECESSARILY DIRECTLY.
BY THAT, THAT'S AGAIN MY ASSUMPTION,
BUT WHO KNOWS WHAT REALLY HAPPENED.
WHAT I WAS TOLD IS THAT DURING THE BIRTH,
THE DOCTORS, THERE WAS AN ERROR AND A MISTAKE MADE
BY THE MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS OF THAT DAY,
WHERE THEY DAMAGED THE OPTICAL NERVE.
AND FOR THE NEXT TWO YEARS,
MY MOM TELLS ME THAT I WAS PRETTY MUCH
IN AND OUT OF HOSPITALS.
I BARELY STAYED IN THE HOUSE.
I WAS IN THE HOSPITAL, PRETTY MUCH.
I WAS A HOSPITAL BABY FOR TWO YEARS.
AND I FOUND OUT SOMETHING JUST RECENTLY
WHERE ONE TIME -
AND I KEPT GETTING SICK ALL THE TIME,
GETTING SICK.
AND ONE TIME, MY MOM TELLS ME
THAT I DIED, WENT TOTALLY BLUE.
AND THEY DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO RUSH ME TO THE HOSPITAL,
SO THEY JUST STARTED TO DO
WHAT THEY KNEW HOW TO DO.
SO MY PASTOR NOW, WHO IS MY UNCLE,
HE WAS ALREADY IN MINISTRY AT THE TIME.
THEY GOT THE FAMILY TOGETHER,
AND JUST, THEY KNEW THEY DIDN'T HAVE TIME
TO TAKE ME TO THE HOSPITAL,
AND EMERGENCY SERVICES WOULDN'T REACH
THE VILLAGE IN TIME.
THEY STARTED TO PRAY.
AND I GUESS I STARTED COUGHING AGAIN
AND CAME BACK, THE COLORS RETURNED.
AND SO FOR TWO YEARS I STRUGGLED WITH THAT.
AND THEN THERE WAS, I BELIEVE,
A SENSE OF HEALING,
I THINK THAT HAPPENED
BECAUSE I STARTED TO GROW WITHOUT ANY PROBLEMS.
BUT THE DAMAGE FROM THE BIRTH DEFECT
OR THE BIRTH INJURY STILL AFFECTED ME.
AND I STARTED TO RECOGNIZE THAT LATER
WHEN I WAS CALLED MY NICKNAME
IN SCHOOL IN THE UKRAINE,
HAD TO DO WITH A DEFORMITY OF THE EYE.
SO THAT WAS REALLY MY NAME.
THEY DIDN'T CALL ME VLAD.
THEY DIDN'T CALL ME VLADIMIR.
THEY CALLED ME WITH A NAME
THAT I CAN'T EXACTLY TRANSLATE IT,
BUT IT HAD TO WITH PRETTY MUCH,
YOU'RE DEFORMED BECAUSE OF YOUR EYE.
AND SO THAT WAS MY NAME.
THAT'S HOW I WAS CALLED.
I THOUGHT THAT WAS NORMAL
BECAUSE I LOOKED IN THE MIRROR,
I WAS LIKE, WELL, I SEE WHAT THEY SEE, SO.
MY PARENTS SAW THAT I HAD THESE KIND OF INSECURITIES.
THEY SCHEDULED THE FIRST EYE SURGERY
IN THE UKRAINE.
AND SO I HAD THE SURGERY.
IT DIDN'T DO MUCH
BECAUSE I STILL HAD THE SAME PROBLEM.
AND THEN AROUND THAT TIME
WE MOVED TO THE UNITED STATES.
I WAS 13.
IT WAS DECEMBER 6TH, 1999.
AND RIGHT BEFORE THE END OF THE WORLD,
THE YEAR 2000.
[ CHUCKLES ]
VLADIMIR: AND MY UNCLE STARTS A CHURCH
SIX MONTHS AFTER THAT.
AND I GO INTO THE FRESHMAN HIGH SCHOOL
IN THE UNITED STATES.
AND I ABSOLUTELY, I DON'T SPEAK ANY ENGLISH
BECAUSE I WAS ACTUALLY LEARNING GERMAN IN UKRAINE.
FOR SOME WEIRD REASON, YEAH,
WE HAD TO CHOOSE BETWEEN GERMAN AND ENGLISH.
AND BECAUSE WE WERE CLOSE TO GERMANY,
SO I WAS LEARNING GERMAN.
SO I ABSOLUTELY, I WAS LEARNING ENGLISH
ON MY WAY TO THE UNITED STATES,
LEARNING WHAT COCA-COLA IS,
OPEN THE DOOR, THE TRAIN,
YOU KNOW, ESPECIALLY THOSE, LIKE, VERY STRONG
BRITISH ACCENTS.
AND SO I WOULD GO TO SCHOOL.
AND I REALLY STRUGGLED THE FIRST TWO YEARS
JUST AS A TEENAGER GROWING UP,
BEING AWARE OF THE FACT THAT I LOOKED DIFFERENT.
I FEEL DIFFERENT.
ALL OF THAT STUFF STARTED TO KIND OF COME UPON ME.
I WASN'T GOOD AT SCHOOL.
I WAS, IN MY FRESHMAN, I STARTED TO GET F'S
BECAUSE OF MY ENGLISH.
SO MY OTHER THOUGHT WAS
TO FIND SOME SORT OF FULFILLMENT
IN A CHURCH ENVIRONMENT.
I'M THINKING, IT'S NOT GONNA BE DIFFICULT
BECAUSE MY UNCLE STARTED A CHURCH,
THE CHURCH IS VERY SMALL,
THERE'S ROOM FOR EVERYBODY TO BE INVOLVED.
AND, REBECCA, THE INTERESTING PART IS THAT,
I GET INVOLVED WHEN THE ONLY THING
THAT I COULD GET INVOLVED IN,
AND THAT WAS THE WORSHIP TEAM,
AND I GET KICKED OUT.
REBECCA: OH, NO.
VLADIMIR: BY MY OWN COUSINS.
AND THEY WERE KIND, THEY WERE MY FRIENDS.
THEY'RE PART OF THE PASTORAL TEAM NOW,
BUT I JUST -
THEY SAID AN ELEPHANT STEPPED ON MY EAR.
I WAS LIKE, HEY, GUYS, I'VE NEVER SEEN AN ELEPHANT,
NOBODY STEPPED ON MY EAR.
THEY'RE LIKE, NO, THAT'S A SAYING,
SAYING THAT YOU CAN'T KEEP A TUNE.
AND I WAS LIKE, WELL, I UNDERSTAND,
BUT I DON'T HAVE LIKE -
THIS IS THE ONLY PLACE TO FIT IN IN THE CHURCH,
AND CAN YOU JUST KEEP ME THERE
AND TURN OFF MY MICROPHONE?
THEY'RE LIKE, WELL, ACTUALLY,
YOUR MICROPHONE HAS BEEN OFF.
YOU'VE JUST BEEN SINGING LOUDER.
THE OTHER MICROPHONES ARE CATCHING IT.
AND SO WE JUST HAVE TO ASK YOU TO LEAVE.
AND SO I'M 13 AND A HALF,
AND I'M FAILING IN SCHOOL,
I HAVE CHRONIC MIGRAINE HEADACHES
BECAUSE OF THIS THING.
I'M LITERALLY JUST AWARE OF THE FACT
THAT WHEN I LOOK IN THE MIRROR,
I SEE SOMETHING THAT I HATE, I DESPISE,
I DO NOT LIKE.
AND THAT'S WHEN IT REACHED A TIPPING POINT
WHERE I DESPISED OF LIFE.
I NEVER ATTEMPTED TO TAKE MY LIFE,
THERE WAS ENOUGH FEAR OF GOD PUT INSIDE OF ME
BY MY PENTECOSTAL UPBRINGING
THAT THAT WAS NOT AN OPTION.
BUT I SECRETLY DESIRED TO DIE.
AND I HOPED, I ASKED,
I REMEMBER PRAYING FOR THE LORD TO END MY LIFE,
THAT I WILL NOT BE A BURDEN TO ANYBODY.
I JUST FELT LIKE I WAS A BURDEN TO EVERYONE.
REBECCA: WHICH IS A TERRIBLE FEELING.
VLADIMIR: AND WHEN YOU'RE YOUNG,
AND, YOU KNOW, NOBODY KIND OF TALKS TO YOU ABOUT IT
AND YOU'RE JUST KIND OF PROCESSING
ALL OF THAT BY YOURSELF,
AND WHAT HELPED ME WAS PRAYER.
WHAT HELPED ME WAS PRAYER.
I WOULD LOCK MYSELF IN MY -
THE HOUSE THAT MY PARENTS HAD.
AND AFTER SCHOOL, RIGHT BEFORE WE WOULD HAVE DINNER,
I WOULD LOCK MYSELF FOR 35 MINUTES,
30 TO 35 MINUTES,
CRANK UP LOUD MUSIC
JUST BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT PEOPLE TO HEAR.
I DIDN'T WANT MY FAMILY,
JUST IN CASE, LISTEN IN TO WHAT I WAS GOING THROUGH.
AND I PROCESSED THAT WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT
THE BEST I KNEW HOW.
I WOULD TELL HIM HOW I FELT.
I'D TELL HIM THAT I DIDN'T WANT TO LIVE,
I DIDN'T HAVE A PURPOSE,
I DIDN'T HAVE A MEANING.
WHY DID HE CREATE ME, ALL OF THAT.
AND IT STARTED LIKE THOSE PSALMS, YOU KNOW,
YOU COMPLAIN.
REBECCA: THE LAMENTS.
VLADIMIR: LAMENTS.
AND THEN YOU END.
BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, COMPLAINING IS LIKE VOMIT,
YOU FEEL BETTER AFTERWARDS.
REBECCA: MM-HMM.
VLADIMIR: AND YOU FEEL, LIKE, RELIEVED.
AND THEN IN THAT MOMENT,
I WOULD FEEL THE PRESENCE OF JESUS COMING IN.
AND HE NEVER GAVE ME AN EXPLANATION
OF WHY CERTAIN THINGS HAPPENED,
BUT HE SHOWERED ME WITH HIS LOVE,
WITH HIS PRESENCE.
AND WHAT STARTED TO HAPPEN, REBECCA,
IS I BECAME LESS AWARE OF MYSELF,
MORE AWARE OF HIS PRESENCE.
AND I WOULD WALK OUT OF THAT ROOM FEELING CONFIDENT,
FEELING SECURE,
FEELING BETTER.
IN FACT, LATER ON I FOUND OUT,
ADAM FELT ASHAMED OF HIS BODY,
THOUGH HE DIDN'T GAIN WEIGHT.
THERE WAS NOBODY ELSE IN THE GARDEN
THAT HE LOOKED AT AND COMPARED HIMSELF AND SAID,
OH, SHOOT, I DON'T LOOK AS GOOD.
WHEN HE LOST SIGHT OF WHO GOD WAS,
HE BECAME AWARE OF WHO HE WAS NOT NOW.
BECAUSE OUR IDENTITY IS IN GOD.
THE MOMENT WE TAKE OUR EYES OFF OF HIM,
WE WILL ALWAYS BEWARE OF OUR NAKEDNESS.
AND WE WILL FEEL ASHAMED.
AND THAT'S WHAT THE LORD STARTED TO TEACH ME
RIGHT THERE IN THAT ROOM.
HE SAYS, THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU.
HE SAYS, YOU JUST HAVE YOUR SKIN STRETCHED
OVER YOUR SKELETON IN A DIFFERENT WAY.
BUT HE SAYS, YOU'RE GONNA BE DUST.
YOUR BODY CAME FROM DUST,
YOU WILL RETURN TO DUST.
HE SAYS, YOUR PROBLEM IS INWARD.
AROUND THAT TIME I HAD THE SECOND EYE SURGERY,
WHICH CONFIRMED AGAIN THAT IT COULDN'T
SOLVE MY PROBLEM.
THE PRESENCE OF JESUS
REDIRECTED MY ATTENTION FROM MYSELF TO HIM.
AND AS I STARTED TO FOCUS MORE ON HIM,
I LOST SIGHT OF ME.
AND WHEN I LOST SIGHT OF ME,
I LOST THE SHAME.
I LOST THE GUILT.
I LOST THE HOPELESSNESS.
I LOST THAT, I'LL NEVER GET MARRIED.
NOBODY WILL EVER LOVE ME.
I DON'T HAVE A PURPOSE.
NOW MY PURPOSE WAS, JESUS, I WANT TO PLEASE YOU.
THE BIBLE WENT FROM A BOOK I READ,
WHICH I READ A LOT OF IT,
TO THE BOOK I EAT.
IT BECAME MY SPIRITUAL FOOD.
I READ THOSE VERSES,
FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY YOU ARE MADE.
LIKE THEY WERE ADDRESSED TO ME.
IT JUMPED, IT BECAME REAL.
AND SHORTLY RIGHT AFTER THAT,
I STARTED TO GET INVOLVED IN SCHOOL.
MY GRADES - FIRST, MY GRADES WENT UP THROUGH THE ROOF.
I STARTED GETTING STRAIGHT A'S.
THE SAME SCHOOL, OR SIMILAR SCHOOL,
AND THINGS JUST CHANGED.
I BECAME POPULAR IN EACH CLASSROOM,
BUT I WASN'T POPULAR FOR ANYTHING,
EXCEPT THEY CALLED ME THE BIBLE BOY,
OR THE LITTLE PASTOR,
LIKE ALL KINDS OF INTERESTING NAMES
THAT THEY WOULD LABEL ME WITH.
I STARTED TO TELL MY FRIENDS ABOUT JESUS.
I STARTED TO PREACH AT CHRISTIAN CLUBS
IN MY HIGH SCHOOL.
I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THEY EXISTED.
THEY WOULD INVITE ME IN
AND SHORTLY AFTER THAT, I'M SPEAKING AT THAT
CHRISTIAN CLUB WITH BROKEN ENGLISH.
I MEAN, I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND HALF OF MY ENGLISH,
BUT I WAS ALREADY PREACHING.
AT 16, MY UNCLE ASKED ME TO BE A YOUTH PASTOR
BECAUSE THE TWO PREVIOUS YOUTH PASTORS QUIT.
AND THAT IS KIND OF HOW MY MINISTRY WAS BORN.
IT WAS REALLY BORN OUT OF PAIN.
FINDING PURPOSE IN JESUS,
AND SAYING TO JESUS,
I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU MY WHOLE LIFE.
YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT WITH IT.
SEND ME TO CHINA.
SEND ME TO INDIA.
SEND ME WHEREVER.
SEND ME TO TEENAGERS AND TO REACH TEENAGERS,
WHATEVER YOU WANT TO DO.
AND THE LORD STARTED TO USE ME.
REBECCA: AND THAT'S HOW YOU'RE THE MOST EFFECTIVE
IN THE SPIRIT IS IF YOU'RE COMPLETELY SURRENDERING
VLADIMIR: AND BROKEN.
REBECCA: AND OBEDIENT.
MM-HMM.
AND WHAT SEEMED TO BE THE GREATEST CURSE
WITH THESE MIGRAINES, THE EYE, THE PAIN,
THE BULLYING,
ENDED UP BEING ONE OF THE GREATEST BLESSINGS
BECAUSE IT PUSHED YOU INTO THE ARMS OF THE FATHER.
VLADIMIR: YES.
REBECCA: AT SUCH A YOUNG AGE
THAT SET YOU UP FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.
VLADIMIR: YOU KNOW, EVERY PROBLEM IS LIKE A KNIFE.
YOU CAN TAKE IT BY THE HANDLE
OR BY THE BLADE.
FOR 16 YEARS - FOR 14 YEARS OF MY LIFE,
I TOOK WHATEVER HAPPENED TO ME BY THE BLADE.
WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?
THIS IS NOT FAIR.
AND I WAS ACTUALLY HURTING MYSELF.
AND WHEN THE LORD SHIFTED EVERYTHING,
I TOOK THE SAME THING BY THE HANDLE NOW
AND IT BECOMES A TOOL.
IT BECOMES A WEAPON.
AND I STARTED TO REALIZE, WAIT,
THESE FAILURES, THEY'RE NOT FINAL.
THEY WERE FERTILIZER FOR MY DESTINY.
AND FERTILIZER IS MANURE.
IT STINKS BUT IT'S NECESSARY
TO FERTILIZE A GARDEN.
REBECCA: AND IT'S NECESSARY TO GO THROUGH THE WILDERNESS,
THROUGH THE BREAKING, THROUGH THE CRUSHING,
BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT FORTIFIES US.
IT'S WHAT CHANGES US.
AND LIKE YOU SAID, YOU HAD TO COME TO THAT PLACE
OF TOTAL SURRENDER.
YOU KNOW, THE OTHER THING I WANTED TO ASK YOU IS,
DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU TURNED TO GOD
AND HE BEGAN INSTILLING IDENTITY IN YOU,
YOU STOPPED VIEWING YOURSELF
THE WAY THE WORLD VIEWED YOU,
AND YOU STARTED VIEWING YOURSELF THE WAY HE SAW YOU,
AND BECAUSE HE LOOKED AT YOU
AND HE SAID THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU,
YOU WERE ABLE TO BELIEVE THAT ABOUT YOURSELF,
AND THEN LIVE THAT OUT?
VLADIMIR: THE LORD CHALLENGED ME.
HE SAID, STOP LOOKING AT THE BATHROOM MIRROR
TO SEE WHO YOU ARE.
HE SAID, LOOK IN THE MIRROR OF MY WORD.
BECAUSE THE BIBLE SAYS THAT
GOD MADE US IN HIS IMAGE AND LIKENESS.
OUR BODIES CAME FROM DIRT.
WHO WE ARE CAME FROM GOD.
SO OUR TRUE IDENTITY IS NOT OUR BODY.
OUR BODY IS THE HOUSE WE LIVE IN.
LIKE IF YOU LOOK AT MY HOUSE RIGHT NOW,
THAT'S NOT ME,
IT'S WHERE I LIVE.
IF YOU LOOK AT MY CAR,
IT'S NOT ME, IT'S WHAT I DRIVE.
MY BODY IS A HOUSE.
THE REAL PERSON LIVES INSIDE OF THE HOUSE,
AND IT'S THE SPIRIT.
AND SO AS I STARTED TO RECOGNIZE
THAT I AM A SPIRIT, NOT A BODY.
I LIVE IN THE BODY.
MINE JUST HAPPENS TO MISS A FEW SHINGLES AND STUFF,
BUT AT THE SAME TIME, THE FACT THAT I CALL IT
A FACTORY DEFECT.
AND SO BUT ONCE WE GET RESURRECTED,
WE'RE GOING TO GET NEW BODIES.
THE LORD'S GONNA GIVE US THAT.
BUT UNTIL THAT TIME, IT PUSHED ME
TO BUILD MY IDENTITY ON THE ROCK,
ON JESUS AND WHAT'S NOT VISIBLE.
AND NOW, YOU KNOW, WHEN I SEE BLESSINGS
AND I SEE SUCCESS
AND I SEE BREAKTHROUGH IN MY MINISTRY,
I CONSTANTLY REMIND MYSELF, VLAD,
YOU'RE NOT VALUED MORE
BECAUSE YOU'RE MORE VISIBLE.
YOU'RE NOT LOVED MORE
BECAUSE YOU'RE MORE APPRECIATED.
YOU'RE THE SAME GUY THAT JESUS DIED FOR,
HOLY SPIRIT INDWELLED,
YOUR NAME IS WRITTEN IN THE BOOK OF LIFE.
WHETHER YOU'RE SUCCESSFUL OR NOT SUCCESSFUL
IN THE EYES OF PEOPLE.
WHETHER YOU LOOK GREAT, OR GOD FORBID,
SOME INJURY HAPPENS
AND I'M NOT ABLE TO WALK ANYMORE
AND I GET CARRIED BY THE WHEELCHAIR,
OR BECOME COMPLETELY PARALYZED
AND MY BODY IS NOT FUNCTIONING.
THE REAL ME IS STILL CONNECTED TO THE LORD.
REBECCA: YEAH.
HAVE YOU EVER HAD THE TEMPTATION
TO LOOK OUTWARD
AND FORM YOUR IDENTITY OFF OF THAT
AS YOU'VE GROWN IN SUCCESS?
VLADIMIR: HONESTLY, FOR ME,
IT'S A CONSTANT STRUGGLE.
I FEEL, EVEN WITH THE INSECURITY,
SOMETIMES IF I -
IF I PULL AWAY FROM THE LORD
AND I LOOK IN THE MIRROR TOO LONG,
I BECOME AWARE.
I'M LIKE, UHH.
LIKE, PEOPLE LOOK AT THIS ALL THE TIME?
OR I EVEN LOOK AT MY OWN VIDEOS SOMETIMES
AND I WAS LIKE, OH, I CAN'T LOOK AT THAT.
REBECCA: IT'S HARD WATCHING YOURSELF.
VLADIMIR: YES, PLUS IT'S HARD JUST WATCHING.
BUT THEN I JUST REMIND MYSELF,
I SAY, VLAD, YOU'VE GOT TO -
WHEN I'M SUPER AWARE OF ME,
THAT TELLS ME I'M NOT AWARE OF HIM RIGHT NOW.
REBECCA: EXACTLY.
VLADIMIR: AND SO THAT'S A TEMPTATION
THAT I CONSTANTLY,
I SAY THAT I KEEP MYSELF IN THAT PLACE
OF NOT ALLOWING IT.
BUT TO SAY THAT I NO LONGER
EVER HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IT,
I WOULD BE LYING IF I SAY THAT.
REBECCA: I APPRECIATE YOUR HONESTY, THOUGH,
BECAUSE I THINK ALL OF US ARE THERE
AND WE LIVE IN AN AGE THAT'S VERY LIKE,
CAN BE SO NARCISSISTIC
BECAUSE IT'S LIKE SOCIAL MEDIA
AND OUR FACE IS ALWAYS OUT THERE.
AND SO YOU CAN BE CONSTANTLY LOOKING AT YOURSELF
WITHOUT EVEN TRYING.
AND SO IT'S A DISCIPLINE.
AND IT'S A TWO-EDGED SWORD.
I'VE BEEN ON BOTH ENDS.
I'VE HAD PRIDE AND I'VE HAD INSECURITY.
AND NEITHER OF THEM ARE GOOD TO THE LORD.
AND SO IT'S LIKE YOU SHOULD NEVER PUT
YOUR TRUST AND YOUR HOPE
AND YOUR ABILITY IN YOUR LOOKS,
BECAUSE YOU'RE EITHER GONNA THINK
YOU'RE BETTER THAN PEOPLE,
OR THERE'S GONNA BE PEOPLE BETTER THAN YOU,
AND YOU'RE GONNA BE INSECURE.
IT HAS TO BE IN HIM.
AND IT'S A CONSTANT BATTLE THAT YOU HAVE TO FIGHT.
VLADIMIR: A HUNDRED PERCENT.
REBECCA: IT'S NOT JUST A ONE-DAY TRANSFORMATION.
IT'S A WALK THAT YOU WALK.
AND THAT'S SOMETHING,
WHAT I REALLY LOVE THAT YOU TALK ABOUT,
THAT I FEEL LIKE NOT A LOT OF PEOPLE
TALK ABOUT IN MINISTRY,
BUT I THINK IS LIKE SO IMPORTANT,
ESPECIALLY FOR US IN AMERICA,
WHERE LIFE IS VERY EASY COMPARED TO OTHER PLACES,
IS THAT WE HAVE TO CRUCIFY OUR FLESH.
AND I THINK A LOT OF US IN AMERICA
ARE LIVING VERY CARNAL LIVES
WITHOUT EVEN REALIZING IT.
AND SO, WHAT WOULD YOU SAY
TO THE PEOPLE WHO ARE LISTENING,
HOW DO YOU CRUCIFY THE FLESH?
VLADIMIR: I BELIEVE THAT WE HAVE TO FIRST
START FROM THE POINT
WHERE OUR OLD MAN HAS BEEN CRUCIFIED.
BECAUSE THE BIBLE IS VERY CLEAR ON THAT,
THAT ON THE CROSS, TWO THINGS HAPPENED.
THE BLOOD WAS SHED FOR OUR SINS.
THE CROSS HAPPENED FOR OUR SIN.
THE SIN IS THAT OLD MAN,
IT'S THE SIN NATURE THAT WE INHERITED THROUGH BIRTH.
I CALL IT THE SPIDER.
SINS ARE THE WEB.
AND SO ON THE CROSS JESUS SPILLED HIS BLOOD
TO TAKE CARE OF MY SINS.
BUT ON THE CROSS, HE TOOK MY SIN,
HE TOOK ME, AND HE NAILED ME ON THE CROSS.
SO MY SINS HE WASHED ME,
HE KILLED.
WHICH MEANS THE OLD ME IS BEYOND REPAIR.
IT CAN'T BE FIXED.
IT ONLY HAS TO BE KILLED.
IT'S NOT SOMETHING I DO FIRST.
IT'S SOMETHING HE DID,
WHICH MEANS ALL THE SELF-CRUCIFYING I DO,
HAS TO COME OUT OF THE PLACE
OF ME BEING DEAD.
NOT TRYING TO DIE.
REBECCA: OH, THAT'S SO IMPORTANT.
VLADIMIR: SO THAT CHANGES EVERYTHING.
BECAUSE THE SAME THING WITH SALVATION.
WE DO GOOD WORKS, NOT TO BE SAVED.
WE DO GOOD WORKS BECAUSE WE ARE SAVED.
AND SO THAT REVELATION REALLY CHANGED
MY PERSPECTIVE ON DISCIPLINE.
BECAUSE IF WE'RE NOT CAREFUL,
WE CAN EXALT DISCIPLINE
AND CRUCIFYING OURSELVES
ABOVE THE REVELATION OF THE BIBLICAL TRUTH.
AND THEN WE RENDER THE CROSS POWERLESS.
IT'S NOT MY CROSS THAT CHANGES ME.
IT'S HIS CROSS THAT ENABLES ME NOW
TO GET ON THE CROSS,
AND SEEING CHANGE IN MY LIFE.
AND SO I START FROM THE POINT
THAT MY OLD MAN, ACCORDING TO THE SCRIPTURES,
GALATIANS CHAPTER 3, VERSE 20,
I HAVE BEEN CRUCIFIED WITH CHRIST.
THE BIBLE SAYS THAT I WAS -
THAT'S WHY WE GET BAPTIZED.
TO IDENTIFY WITH HIS DEATH,
BURIAL AND RESURRECTION.
WE LIVE IN A CULTURE TODAY
WHERE A MAN IDENTIFIES AS A WOMAN.
WHERE A MAN IDENTIFIES AS THIS AND THAT.
AND I THINK AS CHRISTIANS, WE HAVE TO REALIZE,
WE'RE IDENTIFIED WITH SOMETHING.
AND SOME PEOPLE SAY, WELL, VLAD, THAT'S NOT -
THAT'S NOT REAL BECAUSE I DON'T FEEL DEAD.
BUT THE CROSS IS REAL.
REBECCA: MM-HMM.
VLADIMIR: DEATH IS REAL.
SO WHAT WE IDENTIFY WITH
IS WITH JESUS' DEATH, BURIAL AND RESURRECTION.
THAT MEANS MY OLD MAN IS DEAD.
OUT OF THE PLACE OF THAT REVELATION,
NOW I GO TO, NUMBER ONE,
WALKING IN THE HOLY SPIRIT
SO WE DON'T FULFILL THE LUST OF THE FLESH.
THAT'S WHY PAUL KEEPS SAYING,
PRESENT YOUR MEMBERS AS INSTRUMENTS
OF RIGHTEOUSNESS.
DO NOT LET SIN REIGN IN YOUR BODY.
SO I WALK IN THE HOLY SPIRIT
OUT OF THAT REVELATION,
MY OLD MAN IS DEAD.
SINS HAVE BEEN WASHED BY THE BLOOD.
AND THIRDLY, IS THIS IS WHAT I PUT TO DEATH,
THE DESIRES AND THE LUST OF THE FLESH,
AND I CRUCIFY THE OLD MAN.
THAT MEANS, IN OTHER WORDS,
TO LIVE A DISCIPLINED LIFE.
NOT FOR THE SAKE OF DISCIPLINED LIFE.
BECAUSE WE LIVE IN A CULTURE OF
A LOT OF NEW AGERS,
WHO ARE SUPER DISCIPLINED.
PEOPLE WAKE UP AT 4 O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING,
THEY GO TO THE GYM, THEY'RE DISCIPLINED.
BUT THEY'RE NOT CLOSER TO JESUS BECAUSE OF THAT.
OUR DISCIPLINE DOESN'T FLOW,
OR SELF-DENIAL DOESN'T FLOW OUT OF OUR DESIRE
TO BE DISCIPLINED.
IT'S OUT OF OUR DESIRE TO PLEASE HIM.
THE ANALOGY OR THE ILLUSTRATION
THAT I LIKE TO USE FOR PEOPLE IS THIS.
INSTEAD OF CONSTANTLY LOOKING,
WHAT SHOULD I CUT OFF IN MY LIFE,
WE SHOULD BE PASSIONATELY PURSUING JESUS
AND WHATEVER HINDERS THAT PURSUIT
NEEDS TO BE CLIPPED;
NEEDS TO BE TRIMMED;
NEEDS TO BE KILLED;
NEEDS TO BE LAID ASIDE.
SO MY GOAL ISN'T TO LOOK AT MY LIFE AND SAY,
WHAT IS IN MY LIFE WRONG?
NO.
I'M LOOKING AT JESUS, RUNNING AFTER HIM HARD,
AND I'M NOTICING, MY SHOES DON'T FEEL REALLY GOOD.
THAT MEANS I NEED TO REPLACE THEM.
I'M CARRYING TOO MUCH WEIGHT.
THE BIBLE SAYS AS WE RUN THE RACE
TO LAY DOWN EVERY SIN,
AND EVERY WEIGHT.
AND SO AS I BEGIN TO PURSUE AFTER JESUS,
AND I WATCH THE TV SHOW,
AND NOW THERE'S A CONVICTION,
I HAVE TO REMOVE THAT.
I'LL NEVER FEEL THE CONVICTION
IF I DON'T PURSUE JESUS.
I'LL FEEL CONDEMNATION
IF I DON'T PURSUE JESUS.
AND THEN I'LL BE CONFUSED
AND I'LL FALL INTO LEGALISM
INSTEAD OF HOLINESS.
HOLINESS IS A DIRECT RESULT
OF PASSIONATELY PURSUING JESUS
AND REMOVING THINGS THAT THE BIBLE IS VERY CLEAR ABOUT,
AND THAT THE HOLY SPIRIT BECOMES VERY CLEAR ABOUT.
HE JUST DOESN'T GIVE YOU PEACE.
HE DOESN'T GIVE YOU REST.
OTHER CHRISTIANS ARE DOING IT,
BUT YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO.
WHY?
BECAUSE YOU'RE A RUNNER,
AND SOME OF THEM ARE SITTING ON THE SIDELINES.
REBECCA: THAT IS -
THAT IS SUCH A GOOD EXPLANATION.
VLADIMIR: THANK YOU.
REBECCA: YOU KNOW, IT'S LIVING FROM THAT REVELATION,
IT'S UNDERSTANDING WHO THE SOURCE IS.
VLADIMIR: YES.
REBECCA: IT'S NOT SOMETHING YOU DO
OUT OF YOUR OWN WORKS.
IT'S NOT SOMETHING YOU CAN DO YOURSELF.
ONE OF THE GREATEST REVELATIONS
GOD HAD TO TEACH ME,
WHEN I WAS IN BIBLE SCHOOL HE SAID,
EVERYTHING YOU NEED FOR LIFE AND MINISTRY
WILL COME FROM YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH ME.
SO FOCUS ON YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH ME.
AND WHAT HE'S HAD TO TEACH ME,
IS HE IS MY SOURCE.
VLADIMIR: COME ON.
REBECCA: AND IT'S NOT ABOUT ME.
AND I STILL MESS UP.
VLADIMIR: IT'S HARD.
REBECCA: IN THIS AREA, BECAUSE WE WANT TO
PICK IT UP AND DO IT OURSELVES.
AND THAT'S EVEN WITH, LIKE,
OH, I NEED TO CRUCIFY MY FLESH.
WELL, IF YOU'RE DOING IT FROM YOUR OWN WISDOM,
THAT'S NOT THE LORD.
AND THEN IT'S DEPENDING ON YOURSELF.
VLADIMIR: BECAUSE WE CAN MAKE AN IDOL
OUT OF CRUCIFYING OUR FLESH.
REBECCA: YEAH.
VLADIMIR: AND I DID 40 DAY WATER FASTS.
I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO,
YOU KNOW, WE JUST GAVE NINE MONTHS AGO,
ALL OF OUR SAVINGS AGAIN
AND I STEPPED AWAY FROM THE CHURCH SALARY
GIVING THE CHURCH SALARY FOR THE LAST 11 MONTHS
UNTIL WE MOVE INTO A NEW BUILDING.
I BELIEVE IN DEATH TO SELF.
I BELIEVE CHRISTIAN LIFE IS A CRUCIFIED LIFE,
NOT A CARNAL LIFE.
BUT WHERE IT FALLS INTO LEGALISM OR SECULAR,
WHERE IT BECOMES A BURDEN,
BECAUSE JESUS' YOKE IS LIGHT AND IS EASY.
IF THIS WHOLE SELF-DENIAL CARRIES NO JOY,
AND IT WILL NEVER CARRY JOY IF WE'RE TRYING TO
EARN THE PLACE OF DEATH TO OUR FLESH
INSTEAD OF OPERATING FROM THE PLACE
OF DEATH TO OUR OLD MAN.
AND I REMEMBER WHEN THE LORD CALLED ME
TO DO AN EXTENDED FAST.
WE WERE DOING A 21-DAY FAST
AND THE SIXTH DAY OF FASTING
THE HOLY SPIRIT PROMPTED ME.
AND HE SAYS, I WANT YOU TO GO 40 DAYS ON WATER.
I SAID, JESUS, I'M GONNA DIE.
I FELT LIKE THE HOLY SPIRIT SAID,
HE SAYS, WELL, THAT'S EXACTLY THE POINT.
I WANT YOU TO, OF COURSE NOT PHYSICALLY, DIE.
AND I SAID, I WON'T HAVE THE STRENGTH.
I DON'T THINK I CAN MAKE IT.
AND IT WASN'T ME TRYING TO PROVE
OR EVEN CRUCIFY ANYTHING.
IT WAS MORE OF ME FOLLOWING THE LORD
IN THAT.
THE LORD NOT ONLY GAVE ME THE STRENGTH TO COMPLETE IT,
BUT IT WASN'T MY IDOL
BECAUSE I DIDN'T OPERATE -
LIKE JESUS, HE DIDN'T GO INTO THE WILDERNESS
FOR A 40-DAY FAST
TO EARN THE ANOINTING OR THE POWER.
HE CAME OUT OF A PLACE OF
YOU'RE MY BELOVED SON,
AND YOU ARE WELL PLEASED.
WHETHER YOU'RE GONNA FAST
OR NOT GOING TO FAST.
AND ONCE WE REACHED THAT PLACE,
I FEEL LIKE IT GIVES THIS HEALTHY, HOLY MOTIVATION
TO CUT THOSE THINGS OFF.
TURN OFF THAT TV SHOW.
CUT THOSE HABITS.
EVEN CUT THOSE FRIENDS.
BECAUSE WE'RE NOT DOING IT TO EARN IT,
WE'RE DOING IT OUT OF THE RESPONSE,
EVEN THE SCRIPTURE WHERE PAUL SAYS
TO PRESENT OUR BODIES AS LIVING SACRIFICES.
HE SAYS, NOW, BRETHREN.
SO HE SPEAKS FOR TEN CHAPTERS OR SO
ABOUT THE MERCY OF GOD,
THE GRACE OF GOD.
AND HE SAYS NOW YOUR RESPONSE IS TO THIS,
TO LIVE A CRUCIFIED, SACRIFICIAL LIFE.
AND PEOPLE WHO PROPAGATE GREASY GRACE
AND PRETTY MUCH SAYS THAT IF YOU HAVE THE GRACE OF GOD
YOU DON'T NEED TO DO ANYTHING,
AND WHO BELITTLE THE HOLINESS OF GOD,
IT BELITTLES GOD'S CHARACTER.
IT BELITTLES WHO GOD IS.
BECAUSE WITHOUT HOLINESS, NO MAN CAN SEE GOD.
WE CANNOT ASCEND THE HILL OF THE LORD
WITHOUT A PURE HEART AND CLEAN HANDS.
AND SO BUT GOD GIVES US THE RIGHT WAY
TO ACCOMPLISH THAT.
LETTING JESUS TAKE CARE OF OUR SINS
AND KILL THAT OLD MAN
AND NOW GOD GIVES US A PROPER PROCESS.
IT'S OUT OF THE PLACE OF DEATH, KILL THE FLESH.
REBECCA: THAT'S SO GOOD.
AND LIKE YOU WERE SAYING, THE JOY.
AND IT WAS LIKE THE REASON WHY THESE BELIEVERS
IN THE NEW TESTAMENT COULD UNDERGO SUCH PERSECUTION
IS BECAUSE THEY HAD THAT REVELATION
AND IT PROPELLED THEM AND THEY HAD THE HOLY SPIRIT,
AND HE PROPELLED THEM FORWARD THROUGH.
AND PAUL, IT'S LIKE HE HAD THE REVELATION
UNDERSTANDING WHY HE WAS IN THE DIFFERENT PRISONS
HE WAS IN.
HE UNDERSTAND THE PURPOSE,
AND THAT JOY -
IN ONE OF MY FAVORITE VERSES IT SAYS,
JESUS, FOR THE JOY THAT WAS SET BEFORE HIM,
HE SCORNED THE -
VLADIMIR: SCORNING.
REBECCA: YEAH. HE ENDURED SUFFERING
SCORNING THE CROSS -
OR SCORNING ITS SHAME,
ENDURED THE CROSS, SCORNING ITS SHAME.
AND SO IT WAS BECAUSE OF THAT JOY,
HE WAS ABLE TO ENDURE SUCH SUFFERING.
AND, YOU KNOW, ONE OF THINGS IS,
IS THAT MINISTRY IS NOT RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.
MINISTRY SHOULD FLOW FROM YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.
AND ONE OF THE THINGS I LEARNED,
BECAUSE FOR ME, I WAS IN WILDERNESS FOR SO LONG,
SO I HAD RELATIONSHIP FOR SO LONG
WITHOUT ANY MINISTRY.
AND I JUST AM STARTING TO GET
LIKE MINISTRY EXPERIENCE.
AND WHAT WAS INTERESTING FOR ME,
WAS SEEING HOW YOU CAN LOVE MINISTRY,
AND I FINALLY BEGAN TO UNDERSTAND,
I GET WHY PEOPLE IN MINISTRY LOVE MINISTRY
AND THEY CAN MISS RELATIONSHIP.
BUT IF YOU TRY TO BE -
I CAN'T EVEN -
I CAN'T EVEN GO VERY LONG.
I JUST GET ALL THE LIFE SUCKED OUT OF ME.
BUT IF YOU TRY TO DO MINISTRY
WITHOUT RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD,
I COULDN'T LAST.
VLADIMIR: BURNOUT.
REBECCA: IT'S TOTAL BURNOUT.
VLADIMIR: TOTAL BURNOUT.
BECAUSE MINISTRY, UNLIKE ANY OTHER WORK,
YOU HAVE PRESSURE FROM YOUR POSITION,
PAIN FROM PEOPLE,
PUSHBACK FROM DEMONS.
OTHER JOBS DON'T GIVE YOU THAT.
AND THEN YOU HAVE PERSONAL FLAWS THAT BEGIN TO SURFACE,
AND YOU PUT THESE FOUR THINGS TOGETHER,
IT'S A RECIPE FOR DISASTER
RIGHT THERE AND THEN.
AND I THINK THAT TO DO MINISTRY
WITHOUT THE RELATIONSHIP OF THE HOLY SPIRIT,
ONE TIME THE LORD REMINDED ME
OF THE STORY OF ESTHER AND VASHTI.
YOU KNOW, VASHTI WAS COMMANDED
BY HER HUSBAND, KING,
TO COME INTO HIS PRESENCE.
SHE DIDN'T.
BECAUSE THE BIBLE SAYS SHE WAS BUSY
WITH THE FEAST FOR THE WOMEN.
SHE WASN'T DOING ANYTHING ILLEGAL OR IMMORAL.
SHE WAS SIMPLY BUSY WITH A MINISTRY TO THE WOMEN.
REBECCA: OH, WOW.
VLADIMIR: AND BECAUSE OF THAT, SHE DIDN'T GO
INTO THE PRESENCE OF THE KING
WHEN HE COMMANDED HER.
NOW, SHE NEVER STOPPED BEING HIS CONCUBINE.
SHE STOPPED BEING HIS BRIDE.
BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T VALUE HIS PRESENCE
MORE THAN SHE VALUED THE PALACE.
SHE LOVED THE PALACE.
SHE LOVED THE BUSYNESS MORE THAN SHE LOVED
HIS PRESENCE.
ESTHER COMES ON THE SCENE.
SHE DOESN'T GET INVITED, BUT SHE GOES.
FOR 30 DAYS, THERE WAS NO INVITATION.
AND ESTHER GOES, IT ALMOST COST HER LIFE.
SHE LEADS WOMEN TO FAST, AND MEN.
AND ESTHER NEVER LOSES HER CROWN.
SHE SAVES HER NATION.
AND I FELT THE LORD CHALLENGE ME AND HE SAYS,
BE ESTHER, NOT VASHTI.
HE SAYS WHEN I PROMPT YOU,
WHEN I DRAW YOU INTO MY PRESENCE,
DON'T MAKE EXCUSES.
LAZINESS, LOSING BATTLE WITH THE BLANKETS,
BECAUSE YOU'LL STILL REMAIN IN MINISTRY.
YOU'LL JUST LOSE THE LAMP.
YOU'LL LOSE THE SPIRITUAL INFLUENCE.
YOU'LL BE LIKE SAUL.
HE STILL HAD THE POSITION.
WHEN THE ANOINTING LIFTED,
THIS POSITION TORMENTED HIM.
LIKE SAMSON.
HE STILL REMAINED A JUDGE,
BUT WITHOUT THE ANOINTING NOW,
HE WAS HURT BY THE VERY CALLING THAT HE HAD.
IN FACT, SAUL AND SAMSON,
BOTH DIED IN BATTLES WITH PHILISTINES.
AND IF YOU READ THEIR STORY CAREFULLY,
YOU'LL SEE THEY WERE ANOINTED TO CONQUER THEM.
MEANING THE PLACE OF THEIR CALLING
BECAME THEIR FUNERAL.
BECAUSE WE ALWAYS REMAIN IN OUR POSITIONS
BECAUSE WE HAVE JOBS THERE.
WE HAVE RESPONSIBILITIES THERE.
PEOPLE EXPECT US.
BUT WHEN WE LOSE THAT INTIMACY,
THAT PLACE OF OUR CALLING BECOMES OUR GRAVEYARD.
IT SUCKS LIFE OUT OF US.
IT DESTROYS US.
AND WE BEGIN TO GET HURT.
AND IF WE ARE SOMEHOW
SUPER TALENTED, GIFTED OR CHARISMATIC,
WE WILL STOP BEING THE SALT,
WE'LL BECOME THE SUGAR.
REBECCA: OH, GOSH.
VLADIMIR: BECAUSE SALT IS THIS.
WHEN YOU HAVE SALT, YOU WANT WATER.
WHEN YOU HAVE SUGAR, YOU WANT SUGAR.
REBECCA: YEAH, YOU WANT MORE.
VLADIMIR: YOU WANT MORE OF SUGAR.
WHEN WE DON'T HAVE INTIMACY WITH GOD
AND WE'RE SOMEHOW GIFTED AND TALENTED
AND WE'RE LIKE, I DON'T NEED THAT,
PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE WITH US,
THEY NO LONGER FALL IN LOVE WITH JESUS.
REBECCA: OH, GOSH.
VLADIMIR: AND WHEN WE LEAVE -
REBECCA: IT'S TRUE.
VLADIMIR: WHEN WE LEAVE, SO DO THEY.
REBECCA: THAT'S TRUE.
WHEN YOU BUILD IT AROUND A PERSON.
VLADIMIR: BECAUSE IT'S BUILT AROUND A PERSON.
AND WHY IS IT BUILT AROUND THE PERSON?
BECAUSE THE PERSON HAS NOT BUILT THEIR LIFE
AROUND THE PRESENCE.
REBECCA: AND THEN THEY ALLOW THE MINISTRY
TO FEED THEIR OWN EGO.
VLADIMIR: YES.
AND SO IN THEIR GIFT AND THEIR TALENT
GIVEN BY GOD,
TURNS THEM FROM A SAUL.
THAT'S WHY SOMETIMES WHEN PEOPLE COME UP,
AND THEY'RE LIKE, MAN, I LOVE YOUR PREACHING,
AND I CANNOT GET ENOUGH OF YOUR PREACHING.
THAT SCARES ME.
REBECCA: RIGHT.
VLADIMIR: BECAUSE MY DESIRE IS WHEN SOMEBODY LISTENS,
THAT THEY FALL IN LOVE MORE WITH JESUS.
BECAUSE I'M THE SALT OF THE EARTH,
I'M NOT THE SUGAR OF THE EARTH.
THAT MEANS YOU SHOULDN'T DEVELOP
APPETITE AND DESIRE FOR VLAD.
THE REAL GENUINE ANOINTING UPON MY LIFE
IS FOR PEOPLE TO FAST MORE, PRAY MORE,
SEE GOD MORE, LIVE MORE HOLY,
LOVE JESUS MORE.
REBECCA: GET CLOSER TO GOD.
VLADIMIR: BECAUSE WE NEED TO BE SALT,
NOT SUGAR.
BUT WE CANNOT BE SALT
IF WE LOSE OUR SALTINESS.
OUR SALTINESS IS ONLY FOUND
IN THAT INTIMACY.
REBECCA: I WILL SAY, THOUGH,
THAT I THINK ONE OF THE REASONS,
BECAUSE I WAS IN THIS POSITION
WHEN I WAS IN BIBLE SCHOOL,
I HAD NEWLY COME BACK TO THE LORD,
AND I HAD THESE LIKE INCREDIBLE PROFESSORS
THAT WERE, I MEAN, SPIRIT-FILLED,
GREAT TEACHERS, SO A SIMILAR THING.
AND I LOVED THEM AND I WANTED THEIR APPROVAL.
AND I THINK WHAT I HAD TO LEARN IS,
I SAW, YOU KNOW, I THINK GOD ALLOWED ME TO SEE
THEIR NOT SO PERFECT SIDE.
AND I'M SO GLAD, BECAUSE I FELT LIKE
WHAT THE LORD TAUGHT ME THROUGH THAT IS,
IS ANYTHING I DO THROUGH SOMEONE,
THAT'S ME, THAT'S NOT THEM.
THAT'S MY LOVE FOR YOU.
THEY'RE JUST THE VESSEL.
BUT I THINK AS PEOPLE,
ESPECIALLY YOUNG BELIEVERS IN THE FAITH,
IS WE SEE EASIER WITH OUR PHYSICAL
THAN THE SPIRITUAL EYES.
AND SO I THINK IT'S ALSO KIND OF LIKE
AN IMMATURITY THING,
A YOUNG BELIEVER THING,
WHERE IT'S LIKE, OH, THIS PERSON'S IN FRONT OF ME,
AND BECAUSE THEY SEE YOU PHYSICALLY,
THEY LOVE YOU.
AND IT'S LIKE, NO, LOVE THE ONE.
AND I THANK GOD FOR THE LORD.
THAT'S WHY EXACTLY WHAT YOU SAY IS,
WE NEED TO PUSH PEOPLE TOWARDS GOD.
AND THAT'S WHAT -
VLADIMIR: I THINK GOD USES PASTORS, PREACHERS,
PROFESSORS AND PARENTS
TO GUIDE US TO THE LORD.
I THINK THAT SOMETIMES BECAUSE, LIKE YOU SAID,
OF IMMATURITY AND WE'RE STILL GROWING,
WE GET SUPER ATTACHED TO THEM
AT THE BEGINNING STAGES
AND THE LORD CAUSES THESE THINGS TO HAPPEN
AND THEY DO SHAKE OUR FAITH A LITTLE BIT.
ESPECIALLY WITH WHAT HAPPENED WITH
SOME OF THE MINISTERS.
I HAD SOME YOUNG PEOPLE COME UP AND THEY'RE LIKE,
MAN, I FOLLOW THIS PERSON AND I FIND OUT,
YOU KNOW, THEY FELL INTO THIS SCANDAL.
THEY'RE LIKE, MAN, HOW DO I PROCESS THAT?
AND I WOULD TELL THEM, WE WOULD GO TO THE GARDEN,
I WOULD SAY, I WANT YOU TO TAKE THE GARDEN GLOVES,
PUT THEM ON.
I SAID EVERY MAN OF GOD IS A GLOVE.
GOD IS THE HAND.
AND I WAS LIKE, USE THESE GLOVES LONG ENOUGH,
THEY'LL RIP.
WHY?
BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT PERMANENT.
THEY'RE NOT -
THEY'RE MADE OF CLOTH AND THEY DON'T LAST.
THAT'S WHAT MEN AND WOMEN OF GOD ARE.
THEY'RE MEN AND WOMEN FIRST
BEFORE THEY'RE OF GOD.
AND I WAS LIKE, JUST BECAUSE THE GLOVE RIPS,
IT DOESN'T MEAN EVERYTHING YOU DID USING THAT GLOVE,
YOU HAVE TO GO NOW AND UNDO.
IT JUST SIMPLY MEANS THE GLOVE RIPS,
BUT THE HAND IS STILL THERE.
AND I WAS LIKE, GOD IS STILL USING PEOPLE,
BUT GOD USES IMPERFECT PEOPLE.
AND I THINK SOONER OR LATER,
ALL OF US WHO ARE BELIEVERS,
WE MUST UNDERSTAND THESE MINISTRIES EXIST
TO PROPEL OUR WALK WITH GOD.
THEY DON'T EXIST TO REPLACE
OUR WALK WITH GOD.
REBECCA: EXACTLY.
AND EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES.
VLADIMIR: INDEED.
REBECCA: AND THE THING IS,
IS THAT YOU HAVE TO COME TO A PLACE,
WHERE YOUR HOPE IS NOT IN PEOPLE, IT'S IN GOD.
AND I THINK ONE OF THE MOST COMMON
TACTICS OF THE ENEMY,
IS HE WANTS TO GET PEOPLE OFFENDED.
HE WANTS PEOPLE TO PUT THEIR HOPE IN PEOPLE
AND LEADERSHIP,
AND THEN, YOU KNOW, WHEN THEY MAKE A MISTAKE,
THEY'LL TURN AND WALK AWAY.
AND THAT'S WHY IT'S SO IMPERATIVE THAT WE,
LIKE YOU SAID,
GET PEOPLE TO HAVE A SOLID RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.
NOW THAT I'M 31,
I'VE HAD ENOUGH THINGS HAPPEN IN MY LIFE,
THINGS I NEVER WOULD ANTICIPATE
THAT REALLY SHOOK ME.
AND IF I HAD NOT MADE GOD MY FOUNDATION -
YOU KNOW, AFTER MY DAD PASSED
THAT CAUSED SO MUCH TRANSITION.
AND I JUST REMEMBER,
IT WAS HARD.
BUT I WAS ABLE TO WALK THROUGH THAT SEASON
AND I THINK ABOUT HOW EVERY DIFFICULT SEASON
LEADING UP TO THAT, PREPARED ME FOR THAT MOMENT.
BUT I WAS ABLE TO WALK THROUGH THAT MOMENT
AND THE SCRIPTURE THAT CAME TO ME WAS,
IF A MAN BUILT HIS HOUSE ON THE SAND,
THE STORM WILL COME AND IT WILL BE WIPED AWAY.
BUT IF A MAN BUILDS HIS HOUSE ON THE ROCK,
THE STORMS WILL COME AND THE HOUSE WILL STAND.
AND WHAT I FELT LIKE THE LORD SHOWED ME IS
YOU HAVE BUILT YOUR LIFE ON ME.
SO ANYTHING IN YOUR LIFE,
BECAUSE YOU THINK LIKE FOR EXAMPLE YOUR PARENTS,
WELL, YOU KNOW, THEY'RE LIKE YOUR SPIRITUAL COVERING.
MY DAD WAS LIKE A MAN OF GOD.
SO IT'S LIKE, AND HE WAS YOUNG.
HE WAS LIKE 64.
SO WHEN YOU'RE NOT ANTICIPATING SOMETHING,
AND WHEN SOMETHING HAS BEEN SO CONSTANT
YOUR WHOLE LIFE,
HE WAS MY DAD, YOU KNOW, MY WHOLE LIFE,
WHICH IS ONE OF THE MOST CLOSEST RELATIONSHIPS
YOU'LL HAVE.
BUT IF MY FAITH HAD BEEN BUILT ON HIM,
WHEN HE PASSED, I WOULD HAVE FALLEN APART.
BUT BECAUSE, THANK GOD,
MY LIFE HAS BEEN BUILT ON GOD,
IT DOESN'T MATTER.
AND WHEN I WALKED THROUGH THAT I WAS LIKE,
LORD, I MEAN, I'M NOT ASKING FOR ANY TRIALS,
I KNOW THEY'RE GONNA COME,
BUT IT GAVE ME SUCH ENCOURAGEMENT
AND HOPE FOR THE FUTURE
BECAUSE I REALIZED GOD HAS ME.
AND HE'S GONNA CARRY ME THROUGH EVERYTHING.
AND YOU KNOW, RIGHT, WHEN YOU LIVE ENOUGH LIFE,
AND ONE THING'S FOR SURE ABOUT LIFE,
IT'S GONNA CHANGE AND IT'S A LOT.
VLADIMIR: AND THESE CHANGES,
THEY BRING A LOT OF STRESS.
YOU KNOW, I'VE EXPERIENCED AT THE AGE OF NINE,
THERE WERE THREE OF US,
I CALL THEM THREE MUSKETEERS.
WE WERE LIVING ON THE SAME STREET.
AND MY NEIGHBOR HAD A -
ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS HAD A HOUSE,
AND HE HAD THIS SWING.
BUT IT WAS LIKE THIS MILITARY GRADE METAL SWING,
TWO PEOPLE SIT ON BOTH SIDES.
IT'S LIKE GROUNDED IN CONCRETE.
REBECCA: OH, WOW.
VLADIMIR: AND IT'S LIKE THEY -
IN UKRAINE, THEY MAKE THEM PRETTY, PRETTY HEAVY.
AND SO YOU CAN GO UP AND DOWN,
PRETTY MUCH SWING REALLY HIGH.
SO WE'RE ON OUR WAY TO SCHOOL,
NINE YEARS OF AGE,
AND I'M SITTING ON THE SWING, HE'S STANDING,
AND THE SWING HAS THIS METAL BIG BEAM
THAT HOLDS THAT SWING
AND IT'S THIS MUCH SPACE BETWEEN THE CONCRETE
AND THE SWING.
AND WE'RE SWAPPING.
AND WE WERE SWINGING REALLY HIGH.
AND AS I'M SITTING DOWN, HE'S GETTING UP.
AND HE FALLS, AND THE SWING COMES BACK.
AND RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY EYES,
HALF OF HIS SKULL...
REBECCA: OH, MY GOSH.
VLADIMIR: AT NINE YEARS OF AGE.
SO I LOST MY BEST FRIEND.
I MEAN, I WAS -
I WAS NUMB FOR LIKE TWO WEEKS.
AND -
REBECCA: AND YOU WITNESSED HIS DEATH.
VLADIMIR: RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY EYES.
AND THE CRAZIEST PART IS WE WERE SWITCHING.
IT COULD HAVE BEEN MINE.
SO TO PROCESS ALL OF THESE EMOTIONS OF
THIS COULD HAVE BEEN ME,
HE JUST DIED.
I MEAN WE HAD BACKPACKS,
WE WERE GOING TO SCHOOL.
THAT JUST SHOOK ME TO THE CORE.
BECAUSE I HAD A CHRISTIAN FOUNDATION,
I KNEW WHERE HE WENT.
AND IT ACTUALLY BROUGHT MORE OF A REALIZATION
BECAUSE I LIVED WITH THIS REALITY,
I WILL DIE AT -
AFTER 70, I'LL BE THINKING ABOUT DEATH.
FROM THAT POINT ON, I REALIZED, REBECCA,
THAT DEATH WALKS,
PHYSICAL DEATH WALKS WITH ME EVERY SECOND.
IT COULD HAPPEN ANY MOMENT
AND I HAVE TO BE READY ANY MOMENT
TO BE WITH THE LORD.
REBECCA: YEAH.
VLADIMIR: AND THAT GOD IS WITH ME WHEN THOSE,
LIKE YOU MENTIONED, WHEN THOSE THINGS HAPPEN,
HE IS WITH ME.
HE DOESN'T ABANDON ME.
HE DOESN'T LEAVE ME.
THAT'S WHY DAVID SAYS, THOUGH I WALK THROUGH
THE VALLEY OF THE SHADOW OF DEATH,
YOU KNOW, YOU ARE WITH ME.
JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE WITH ME
DOESN'T MEAN I DON'T GO THROUGH THEM.
SOMETIMES, YOU KNOW, WHEN WE'RE YOUNG BELIEVERS,
WE THINK THAT BECAUSE HE'S WITH ME,
HIS ROD AND STAFF COMFORT ME,
I'LL NEVER GO THROUGH THE FIRE,
I'LL NEVER GO THROUGH THE LOSS OF A FRIEND.
I WILL NEVER GO THROUGH THE LOSS
OF A RELATIONSHIP.
EVERYTHING WILL ALWAYS WORK OUT LIKE IN THE MOVIES.
EVERYTHING WORKS OUT.
BUT THAT'S NOT THE PICTURE OF CHRISTIAN FAITH.
OUR COMMANDER AND CHIEF, JESUS CHRIST,
HAS SCARS IN HIS HANDS,
SCARS IN HIS FEET AND IN HIS SIDE.
WHICH TELLS US -
AND HE PROMISES, ONE OF THE PROMISES -
NOBODY LIKES TO QUOTE THAT IN THIS WORLD
YOU WILL HAVE TRIBULATION.
BUT HE SAYS THIS.
BE OF GOOD CHEER.
HE DOESN'T SAY BE DEPRESSED,
BE DEBBIE THE DOWNER.
HE SAYS, NO, BE OF GOOD CHEER.
I HAVE OVERCOME THIS WORLD.
MEANING, I'M BUILDING WITHIN YOU
TO BE A STRONG MAN AND A WOMAN OF GOD.
SO WHATEVER THAT YOU GO THROUGH,
YOU'RE NOT GOING TO GET STUCK IN.
YOU WILL GET REFINED BUT NOT DEFINED
BY THOSE PROBLEMS.
YOU WILL GET PURIFIED.
YOU KNOW, MY FAITH, OUR FAITH,
IS NOT LIKE PAPER THAT BURNS
WHEN IT GOES THROUGH THE FIRE.
OUR FAITH, THE BIBLE SAYS, IS LIKE GOLD.
GOLD BECOMES MORE PRECIOUS.
IT BECOMES MORE PURE.
IT BECOMES MORE VALUABLE
WHEN IT GOES THROUGH THE FIRE.
AND SO I THINK SOME PEOPLE NEED TO -
OUR FEELINGS ARE LIKE PAPER.
THEY GO IN FLAMES QUICKLY.
SOMETHING BAD HAPPENS,
WHERE IS GOD, WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME?
YOU KNOW, OUR SOUL SOMETIMES FEELS THAT.
THAT'S WHY DAVID, MANY TIMES, SPOKE TO HIS SOUL.
YOU KNOW, HE DIDN'T LIVE IN HIS SOUL,
HE TOLD HIS SOUL,
HEY, COME ON, LET'S WORSHIP THE LORD.
REBECCA: HE COMMANDED HIS SOUL.
VLADIMIR: HE COMMANDED HIS SOUL.
HE SAID, BLESS THE LORD, O MY SOUL.
AND MANY BELIEVERS, WHAT THEY DO IS,
THEY LIVE IN THEIR SOUL.
SO WHEN YOU GO THROUGH THESE SEASONS,
YOU LIVE IN YOUR SOUL,
SO YOUR SOUL TELLS YOU ALL OF THESE VERSIONS ABOUT GOD.
GOD LEFT YOU.
WHERE IS GOD IN ALL THIS?
WHAT ARE THE PROPHETIC WORDS?
WELL, YOU PRAYED FOR YOUR MOM BUT SHE DIED.
YOU PRAYED FOR THIS.
WELL, DROP YOUR FAITH IN EVERYTHING.
SO STOP LISTENING TO YOUR SOUL.
YOU HAVE TO LISTEN TO THE LORD
AND LIVE OUT OF YOUR SPIRIT
AND THEN LEAD YOUR SOUL
IN THESE VERY DIFFICULT VICISSITUDES OF LIFE,
TRANSITIONS OF LIFE,
KNOWING THAT YOU WILL GET THROUGH ON THE OTHER SIDE
AND WHEN YOU WALK THROUGH THE VALLEY
OF THE SHADOW OF DEATH,
YOU'LL COME TO A PLACE
WHERE YOUR CUP IS RUNNING OVER,
WHERE YOU'RE SITTING IN THE PRESENCE
OF YOUR ENEMIES,
GOODNESS AND MERCY FOLLOWS YOU
ALL THE DAYS OF YOUR LIFE.
IT'S LIKE A FRESH SEASON, A NEW SEASON,
AND ONLY GOD CAN DO THAT.
REBECCA: AND ONE OF THE BEST THINGS ABOUT THE STORMS,
BESIDES THE PROCESS THAT GOD DOES WITHIN YOU,
THE REFINING, THE FORTIFYING,
IS THE INTIMACY THAT YOU CAN HAVE WITH HIM.
VLADIMIR: YEAH.
REBECCA: BECAUSE THERE'S JUST SOMETHING
ABOUT HIM WALKING WITH YOU
THROUGH SOMETHING VERY DIFFICULT,
AND HIM BEING THE ONE PERSON
YOU CAN COUNT ON.
THE ONE PERSON THAT WILL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOU,
RELATE TO YOU, MINISTER TO YOU,
EXACTLY WHAT YOU NEED
EXACTLY WHEN YOU NEED IT.
I JUST THINK ABOUT ALL THE DIFFERENT THINGS
GOD HAS DONE FOR ME.
AND IT JUST BRINGS YOU SO CLOSE.
IT'S LIKE HOW YOU ARE WITH -
YOU KNOW, WE'RE BOTH MARRIED.
SO WITH OUR SPOUSES, IT'S LIKE,
YOU'RE SO CLOSE TO THEM
BECAUSE NOT ONLY ARE YOU IN A COVENANT WITH THEM,
BUT IT'S LIKE YOU DO LIFE TOGETHER.
AND WHEN YOU WALK WITH SOMEONE THROUGH DIFFICULTY,
YOU ARE CLOSER THAN, YOU KNOW,
JUST THE PEOPLE THAT YOU ENJOY THE GOOD TIMES WITH.
VLADIMIR: A HUNDRED PERCENT.
I THINK DISCOVERING DIFFERENT FACETS
OF GOD'S CHARACTER IN THOSE MOMENTS.
ABRAHAM DID NOT KNOW GOD, JEHOVAH JIREH,
UNTIL HE HAD TO LAY HIS SON ON THE ALTAR.
AND THEN HE MET JEHOVAH JIREH,
THE LORD WHO PROVIDES A SACRIFICE.
YOU KNOW, WE DON'T NEED THE LILY OF THE VALLEY -
THAT'S ONE OF THE NAMES OF GOD -
UNTIL WE'RE IN THE VALLEY.
REBECCA: THAT'S A REALLY GOOD POINT.
VLADIMIR: THE THREE HEBREW BOYS DID NOT MEET
THE FOURTH MAN UNTIL THEY WERE -
IT'S ALMOST LIKE HE WAS SHINING
WHEN THE FIRES WERE THERE.
SO I THINK THAT SOMETIMES WE FORGET
THAT HIS NAME IS EMMANUEL,
HE IS WITH US.
BUT WE REALLY -
HE'S NOT JUST WITH US THROUGH THE GOOD TIMES,
HE'S WITH US THROUGH THE MOST CHALLENGING TIMES.
BUT THE DEVIL WILL COME AND USE
THOSE CHALLENGING TIMES
TO PUSH US AWAY AND TO SAY,
YOU KNOW WHAT, LEAVE HIM NOW.
DON'T TRUST IN HIM.
YOU DON'T HAVE A HOPE.
YOU DON'T HAVE A FUTURE.
AND THAT'S WHAT I FELT WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER.
YOU KNOW, WHAT'S THE POINT TO PRAY?
WHAT'S THE POINT OF PRESSING IN?
LOOK, GOD ABANDONED YOU.
GOD LEFT YOU.
HE DIDN'T LET YOU TO BE BORN
YOU KNOW, THIS PARTICULAR WAY.
AND, YOU KNOW, I THOUGHT THAT MY LIFE WAS DONE WITH.
I'M ONLY 16, ONLY 15.
NOW LOOKING BACK, I WAS LIKE,
WHAT A LIE THAT THE ENEMY
WAS FEEDING MY MIND WITH, AND STUFF.
ONE OF THE LIES WAS THAT I'LL NEVER GET MARRIED.
AND THEN I GREW UP AND UNDERSTOOD THAT MOST GIRLS
DON'T MIND HOW YOU LOOK,
AS LONG AS YOU HAVE SOMETHING IN YOUR BRAINS,
AND IN YOUR WALLET.
[ LAUGHTER ]
VLADIMIR: AND I WAS, MAN,
SOMEBODY SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME
WHEN I WAS 14
AND THEN I WOULDN'T BE THAT DESPAIRED.
REBECCA: YOU KNOW, I AGREE THE LIES OF THE ENEMY.
I REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME
I FINALLY REALIZED THAT THE ENEMY
IS NOT ONLY SPEAKING TO ME,
BUT THAT HE LIES.
AND I REMEMBER I HAD OPENED UP TO MY PARENTS
AND IT'S LIKE -
I DON'T WANT TO GIVE THE WHOLE STORY.
BASICALLY I HAD AN ENCOUNTER WITH GOD
WHEN I WAS IN SCHOOL.
I WAS AWAY FROM GOD
AND I DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE.
I WAS IN SUCH DECEPTION.
THAT'S WHY I HAVE SUCH A PASSION FOR PEOPLE
THAT ARE -
TO SHARE THE TRUTH.
BECAUSE I WAS IN DECEPTION.
AND I HAD AN ENCOUNTER WITH GOD
WHERE GOD GAVE ME AN OPEN VISION
AND HE SAID, IF YOU GO DOWN THIS PATH,
I SAW THIS SUPER DARK PATH,
AND IT SAID BROAD IS THE WAY
THAT LEADS TO DESTRUCTION.
AND GOD SPOKE TO ME AND HE SAID,
IF YOU GO DOWN THIS PATH, YOU WILL DESTROY YOURSELF.
AND I WAS ON A PATH TO HELL
AND I DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE IT.
VLADIMIR: WOW.
REBECCA: AND THE FEAR OF GOD STRUCK ME
AND I REACHED OUT TO A COUNSELOR FOR HELP.
AND I WAS LIVING IN SIN.
AND, YOU KNOW, I CONFESSED EVERYTHING TO HIM,
AND THEN HE BROUGHT MY PARENTS IN.
I REMEMBER WALKING IN THE NEXT DAY WITH MY PARENTS
AND THE ENEMY GOES,
YOUR PARENTS DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU.
THEY DON'T EVEN WANT TO BE HERE.
AND I REMEMBER FOR THE FIRST TIME THINKING,
THAT DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT.
AND I REMEMBER IN THAT SESSION SAYING,
I JUST HEARD THIS
AND I JUST DON'T FEEL LIKE IT'S TRUE
AND I FEEL LIKE IT'S THE DEVIL.
BUT I REMEMBER I TOLD THEM AND THEY SAID,
NO, WE WANT TO BE HERE, OBVIOUSLY.
WE WANT TO HELP YOU.
WE WANT WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU.
BUT WHEN I WAS ABLE TO BEGIN TO IDENTIFY
WHAT IS MY VOICE,
WHAT IS THE LORD'S VOICE,
AND WHAT IS THE ENEMY'S VOICE AND HIS LIES,
WHEN YOU'RE ABLE TO IDENTIFY THOSE THINGS,
IT HAS NOT AS MUCH POWER OVER YOU.
BUT WHEN YOU WERE YOUNGER,
I THINK ONE OF THE THINGS THE ENEMY TRIES TO DO
IS OBVIOUSLY LIE TO US,
BUT I THINK TAKE HOPE.
HE WANTED YOU TO THINK
THAT YOUR LIFE HAD NO PURPOSE AND NO FUTURE.
VLADIMIR: YES, UH-HUH.
REBECCA: BUT GOD HAD SUCH A PLAN
AND A PURPOSE FOR YOU.
VLADIMIR: AND THAT'S ONE OF THE THINGS
THAT YOU JUST MENTIONED,
HOW YOU DISTINGUISH THE VOICE OF GOD.
GOD'S VOICE CARRIES GOD'S HOPE.
GOD'S PURPOSE.
IT'S ALWAYS IN LINE WITH GOD'S WILL,
WHICH THERE'S ALWAYS HOPE.
GOD IS A FAITH GOD.
GOD IS NOT DEPRESSED.
GOD IS NOT HOPELESS.
GOD IS NOT SITTING UP THERE PULLING HIS HAIR,
HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
WITH WHAT'S HAPPENING IN THE MIDDLE EAST
AND EVERYWHERE.
GOD IS A VERY HOPEFUL GOD.
HIS VOICE WILL ALWAYS CARRY
THAT DNA OF GOD.
SATAN'S VOICE IS THE OPPOSITE.
IT'S HOPELESSNESS, IT'S DESPAIR.
AND WHEN YOU BEGIN TO SENSE THAT,
YOU KNOW, THEN WE KNOW,
HEY, THIS IS NOT FROM THE LORD.
AND I LIKE WHAT YOU HIGHLIGHTED,
IS THAT YOU VOCALIZED THAT.
A LOT OF TIMES WHEN WE HEAR THE VOICE,
AND WE JUST SIMPLY REPEAT THAT OUT LOUD,
WE OURSELVES ARE LIKE,
THIS IS WRONG.
BUT WHEN IT'S IN OUR HEAD, THIS SOUNDS MAYBE WRONG.
WHEN IT COMES OUT OF OUR MOUTH,
THIS IS DEFINITELY WRONG.
AND THEN SOMETIMES YOU'RE IN THE COMMUNITY OF BELIEVERS,
SOMEBODY ELSE HEARS IT,
AND THEY'RE LIKE, THAT IS NOT ONLY WRONG,
THAT IS DEMONIC.
REBECCA: YEAH.
VLADIMIR: YOU SHOULD DEFINITELY NOT BELIEVE THAT.
AND THEN BREAKING THAT WITH JESUS' WORD.
I LOVE WHAT JESUS DID IN THE WILDERNESS
WHEN SATAN CAME TO HIM.
MY PERSONAL OPINION,
I DON'T HAVE A SCRIPTURE TO BACK IT UP,
THAT SATAN, MOST OF THAT TEMPTATION
WAS COMING IN THE FORM OF A THOUGHT.
BECAUSE THE BIBLE SAYS HE WAS TEMPTED AS WE ARE.
AND WHEN I GET TEMPTED,
THE DEVIL DOESN'T SHOW UP WITH A PITCHFORK.
REBECCA: NO.
VLADIMIR: BECAUSE IF HE WOULD, I WOULD BE LIKE,
I'LL GRAB THE BIBLE AND GO STAB HIM.
JUST DO SOMETHING WITH THE BIBLE.
IT WOULD BE EASY TO RESIST HIM
IF HE WOULD COME WITH A PITCHFORK.
WHY IT'S HARD TO RESIST HIM,
BECAUSE HE DOESN'T COME WITH A PITCHFORK,
HE COMES CLONED AS MY THOUGHTS.
REBECCA: HE INTRODUCES A THOUGHT,
MAKING YOU THINK, DISGUISED AS YOUR OWN.
VLADIMIR: YES, YOUR OWN.
AND VOCALIZING THOSE THOUGHTS
COULD HELP US TO DISTINGUISH THEM
A LITTLE BIT BETTER
IF WE'RE NOT SURE.
AND THEN HAVING ANOTHER PERSON TO HEAR YOU VOCALIZING,
FOR EXAMPLE, OR ME VOCALIZING,
WHAT I'M HEARING OR FEELING IN MY HEART
AND IN MY SOUL,
COULD HELP THEM TO REALLY VALIDATE,
OKAY, THIS IS NOT FROM GOD.
BUT WHAT I BELIEVE HELPS US TO OVERCOME
THESE DEMONIC THOUGHTS,
IS NOT FIGHTING THOUGHTS WITH THOUGHTS.
THAT'S THE MISTAKE PEOPLE MAKE.
AND WHERE THEY SAY, WELL, I'M JUST GONNA MEDITATE
ON GOD'S TRUTH
AND THAT WILL SQUASH THE DEVIL'S LIES
THAT COME IN THE FORM OF THOUGHTS.
BUT THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS.
YOU DON'T HIT A THOUGHT THAT'S DEMONIC
WITH A THOUGHT THAT'S FROM GOD.
YOU ONLY CAN SQUASH IT WITH A WORD
SPOKEN OUT OF YOUR MOUTH.
JESUS SPOKE THE WORD TO THE DEVIL.
HE DIDN'T THOUGHT THE WORD IN HIS MIND.
AND I BELIEVE IN THE POWER OF
SPEAKING THE SCRIPTURES,
AND MEMORIZING SCRIPTURES.
IN FACT, I HAVE A GROUP THAT WE MEMORIZE VERSES
OF THE BIBLE ONCE A WEEK.
AND I REALLY BELIEVE IN US MEMORIZING SCRIPTURE,
AND THEN SPEAKING OUT,
ESPECIALLY WHEN WE'RE BEING TEMPTED,
OR SOME LIE COMES IN.
WE VERBALIZE IT.
IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE OUT LOUD.
BUT IT COULD BE JUST ENOUGH WHERE YOU HEAR YOURSELF
AND RIGHT AWAY THOSE THOUGHTS
THAT WERE ABOUT TO TAKE ROOT,
THEY GET ALMOST LIKE SPIRITUALLY ABORTED.
AND THEN WE EXPERIENCE THAT VICTORY.
REBECCA: YEAH.
BECAUSE WHAT'S SO CRAZY IS
WHEN THE DEVIL WAS TEMPTING JESUS,
HE WAS TWISTING THE WORD OF GOD.
VLADIMIR: AS WELL, YEAH.
REBECCA: SO WE NEED TO KNOW THE WORD OF GOD.
BECAUSE THE DEVIL KNOWS THE WORD OF GOD,
AND HE CAN KNOW HOW TO MANIPULATE IT
AND USE IT AGAINST US.
VLADIMIR: AND IT ALSO TELLS ME
ANYBODY WHO'S TWISTING GOD'S WORD
IS ON THE DEVIL'S PAYROLL.
REBECCA: MM-HMM, YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN.
BUT THE THING IS, IS THAT,
IN THE SWORD OF THE SPIRIT,
IS THE WORD OF GOD.
BUT IF YOU DON'T HAVE THAT READY IN YOUR ARSENAL,
WHEN THAT MOMENT COMES, YOU'RE NOT GONNA BE READY.
VLADIMIR: INDEED.
REBECCA: YOU HAVE TO EQUIP YOURSELF
BY KNOWING HIS WORD.
AND THAT'S HOW JESUS COMBATTED THE DEVIL
EVERY SINGLE TIME.
THE DEVIL WOULD SAY, WELL, IT IS WRITTEN,
AND JESUS SAID, WELL, IT'S ALSO WRITTEN.
BECAUSE HIS WORD IS WHAT'S TRUE.
AND EVERYTHING IN OUR LIVES,
WE HAVE TO BASE IT OFF HIS WORD.
BECAUSE I THINK BEING IN THE SPIRIT-FILLED REALM,
ONE OF THE THINGS A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE GUILTY OF,
THEY CAN GET UP IN THEIR FEELINGS,
AND KIND OF LIKE IN THE SPIRIT,
BUT IT'S NOT GROUNDED IN THE WORD OF GOD.
AND SO EVERYTHING -
VLADIMIR: GOD TOLD ME.
REBECCA: GOD TOLD ME.
VLADIMIR: HAS BECOME THE NEW THING.
I FIND IT INTERESTING,
IN THE WILDERNESS, JESUS DIDN'T SAY TO THE DEVIL,
GOD TOLD ME.
HE DIDN'T EVEN SAY I SAID,
EVEN THOUGH THOSE WERE HIS WORDS.
HE SAID, IT IS WRITTEN.
IF JESUS, THE WORD OF GOD,
CHOSE TO USE THE WRITTEN WORD OF GOD
AGAINST THE DEVIL,
IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW SPIRIT-FILLED WE ARE,
WE COULD NEVER OUTGROW OUR NEED
TO USE MORE OF IT IS WRITTEN THAN GOD TOLD ME.
WHEN I WAS A YOUNGER PASTOR, REBECCA,
ONE OF THE THINGS THAT PASTOR,
MY PASTOR CORRECTED ME,
I WOULD START MY SERMON LIKE THIS.
THIS WEEK, THE LORD TOLD ME.
AND I WOULD ALWAYS START -
AND THE REASON I WOULD SAY THAT INTENTIONALLY,
IS BECAUSE I KNEW I DIDN'T HAVE CREDIBILITY.
SO BY SAYING GOD TOLD ME THIS WEEK,
I WANTED TO REALLY GET THEIR ATTENTION.
I WAS IN PRAYER
AND GOD TOLD ME TO SHARE THIS WITH YOU.
AND MY PASTOR REBUKED ME ONE TIME
AND HE SAID, STOP USING THAT.
HE SAYS, HALF OF THE THINGS YOU SAID GOD TOLD YOU,
IT WASN'T GOD.
HE SAID IT WAS YOUR OWN THOUGHTS.
HE SAID, SECONDLY, SPEAK THE WORD OF GOD
IN SUCH A WAY WHERE PEOPLE WILL COME AFTERWARDS
AND SAY GOD SPOKE TO ME THROUGH YOU.
NOT YOU BLOWING YOUR TRUMPET AND SAYING,
GOD SPOKE TO ME.
HE SAYS YOU'RE TOO YOUNG,
AND HE SAYS, GOD DOESN'T SPEAK TO YOU AS MUCH
AS YOU THINK HE DOES.
I MEAN MY PASTOR JUST -
REBECCA: HE JUST -
VLADIMIR: BUT HE REALLY WANTED TO BUILD THAT
SCRIPTURE-BASED PREACHING
AND USING LESS OF GOD TOLD ME.
AND THEN AS I STARTED TO LEAD THE YOUTH,
I STARTED TO NOTICE THIS PANDEMIC,
WHERE A 16-YEAR-OLD WILL COME AND HE'S LIKE,
GOD TOLD ME WHO MY WIFE IS GONNA BE.
I WAS LIKE, HOW OLD ARE YOU?
HE'S LIKE, 16.
AND THEN NEXT WEEK I FIND HIM TALKING TO THIS GIRL,
AND THEN I FIND OUT THAT HE'S STALKING HER,
COMING TO HER AND SAYS,
HEY, GOD TOLD ME YOU'RE MY WIFE.
DID HE BEAR A CONFIRMATION WITH YOU?
AND SHE'S LIKE, NO, GET AWAY FROM ME,
I'M GONNA CALL POLICE.
AND WHEN WE DEVELOP THIS,
ESPECIALLY LIKE YOU SAID, SPIRIT-FILLED CULTURE,
A SPIRIT-FILLED CULTURE IN CHURCHES,
WE CAN DEVELOP PEOPLE WHO DO NOT APPRECIATE,
DO NOT KNOW AND DO NOT VALUE THE SCRIPTURE.
AND WE'RE JUST FOLLOWING PRETTY MUCH
WHAT WE FEEL IN OUR HEARTS
AND THAT COULD BE EXTREMELY MISLEADING.
REBECCA: YEAH, AND DANGEROUS.
VLADIMIR: AND DANGEROUS.
REBECCA: BECAUSE THERE'S A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN
FOLLOWING YOUR HEART, VERSUS FOLLOWING THE SPIRIT.
BECAUSE THE HEART IS THE SOUL.
THE SPIRIT IS THE HOLY SPIRIT WITHIN US.
VLADIMIR: YEAH.
AND OUR HEART IS NOT ALWAYS IN LINE
WITH GOD'S WORD.
SOMETIMES IT'S JUST A REFLECTION OF
WHAT WE'RE GOING THROUGH,
SOMETIMES IT'S HORMONES.
SOMETIMES IT'S JUST PHYSIOLOGY,
OUR OWN BODIES EXPERIENCING,
FEELING SOMETHING.
AND IT MIGHT NOT BE GOD AT ALL.
REBECCA: YEAH.
ONE OF THE THINGS MY PROFESSOR SAID,
IS HE SAID, OUR SOULS KNOW IT NEEDS SOMETHING,
BUT IT DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT NEEDS.
GOD KNOWS WHAT WE NEED.
AND THAT'S WHY WE HAVE TO TUNE -
IT'S LIKE WE CAN FEEL LIKE SOMETHING IS OFF,
BUT ONLY GOD KNOWS.
AND THAT'S WHY WE HAVE TO TURN TO HIM.
SO I WANT TO GET BACK INTO YOUR STORY.
SO YOU'RE 16, YOU'VE HAD THIS WILDERNESS SEASON,
HOW MANY YEARS, LIKE THREE YEARS?
WAS IT 13 TO 16?
VLADIMIR: YEAH, ABOUT THAT TIME.
REBECCA: AND THEN WHEN YOU'RE 16, YOUR UNCLE -
VLADIMIR: UH-HUH.
REBECCA: SO HE WAS A PASTOR OF -
WAS HE SENIOR PASTOR OF THE CHURCH?
VLADIMIR: UH-HUH.
HE'S THE FOUNDING PASTOR STILL.
REBECCA: IS HE MOM'S SIDE OR DAD'S SIDE,
I'M JUST CURIOUS?
VLADIMIR: MY MOM'S SIDE.
REBECCA: NICE. OKAY.
SO THAT WAS -
WHICH GRANDPARENT WAS YOUR MOM'S SIDE?
VLADIMIR: MY MOM'S SIDE WAS THE ONE
THAT WAS BEATEN BY COMMUNISTS
AND SENT TO JAIL FOR FIVE YEARS.
REBECCA: WOW, OKAY.
VLADIMIR: SO THAT WAS MY PASTOR'S GRANDFATHER.
REBECCA: SO THAT WAS THE -
SORRY, PEOPLE ARE LIKE,
WHY ARE YOU GETTING INTO ALL THIS?
SO THAT WAS THE GRANDMOTHER THAT HAD 16 CHILDREN?
VLADIMIR: YES.
HE'S THE FIRST, HE'S THE FIRSTBORN OF THOSE 16.
REBECCA: WOW, OH, MY GOODNESS.
VLADIMIR: THAT'S MY PASTOR.
REBECCA: THAT'S SO WILD.
OKAY. SO HE COMES TO YOU AND SAYS -
AND I THINK IT'S REALLY INTERESTING THAT
EVEN WHEN YOU WENT TO LOOK FOR A COMMUNITY,
YOU WENT TO THE WORSHIP TEAM,
AND YOU GOT REJECTED.
AND EVEN THOUGH THAT WAS HARD,
IT WAS ACTUALLY A GOOD THING.
BECAUSE YOU WENT TO THE LORD.
BUT NOW GOD IS LINING YOU UP.
VLADIMIR: NO DANCING PARTY.
YEAH, ACTUALLY AFTER I GOT HEALING,
I GOT BACK TO THE SAME WORSHIP TEAM
AND I WAS THE WORSHIP LEADER FOR TWO YEARS.
REBECCA: WAIT. ARE YOU SERIOUS?
VLADIMIR: YEAH.
REBECCA: BUT I THOUGHT YOU COULDN'T SING.
VLADIMIR: NO.
THEY LET ME IN BECAUSE
PASTOR SAW THAT I WAS PREACHING,
AND HE WANTED ME TO INTRODUCE EACH SONG
BY SHARING SCRIPTURE,
AND I KNEW THE SCRIPTURE.
AND SO HE WANTED ME -
I ACTUALLY WAS BARELY SINGING.
I WAS LIKE SPEAKING IN TONGUES ALMOST ALL OF THE TIME
BECAUSE OUR WORSHIP WAS MORE PRAYER.
AND SO, YEAH, UNTIL I STEPPED DOWN,
AFTER ABOUT TWO YEARS.
I FEEL LIKE THE LORD VINDICATED ME.
REBECCA: YOU HAD A FULL-CIRCLE MOMENT.
VLADIMIR: I EVEN HAD ONE LADY COME ONE TIME
AFTER SERVICE,
SHE'S LIKE, HAVE DO YOU HAVE YOUR OWN CDS?
AND I WAS LIKE, AND I UNDERSTOOD
IN THE BACK OF MY HEAD,
I'M LIKE, I THINK SHE'S DEAF
BECAUSE IF SHE WOULD ACTUALLY HEAR ME SING,
SHE WOULD NEVER ASK ME IF I HAVE CDS.
BUT, NO, I DIDN'T HAVE CDS.
AND THEN I REALLY STARTED TO JUST BE
MORE INVOLVED IN PREACHING.
REBECCA: SO HE CAME TO YOU AND HE ASKED YOU
TO TAKE OVER THE YOUTH GROUP.
VLADIMIR: YEAH.
REBECCA: BUT YOU SAID TWO OTHER PEOPLE HAD QUIT.
VLADIMIR: QUIT. SIX MONTHS - YEAH, SIX MONTHS.
ACTUALLY I FOUND OUT THIS LATER,
AT LEAST DURING THAT TIME,
THE AVERAGE TIME THAT YOUTH PASTORS WOULD LAST
WAS SIX MONTHS.
REBECCA: YEAH, BECAUSE IT'S HARD.
VLADIMIR: YEAH.
AND I TAKE OVER AT 16.
SIX MONTHS PASSES, IT'S JUST MY SEVEN COUSINS,
SEVEN OR EIGHT COUSINS.
SO IT WAS NO DANGER.
REBECCA: IT WAS YOUR WHOLE FAMILY?
VLADIMIR: YEAH.
WELL, I MEAN, EACH FAMILY HAD FIVE, SIX KIDS,
AND THEN WE JUST WERE LEARNING ENGLISH,
SO THERE WAS NOT A LOT OF PEOPLE COMING IN AT FIRST.
SIX MONTHS INTO IT,
I HAD THE MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENT.
FIRST, YOU KNOW, MY COUSINS,
THEY DON'T RESPECT ME.
YOU KNOW, I'M THEIR AGE.
REBECCA: THIS IS YOUR FAMILY.
VLADIMIR: THIS IS MY FAMILY.
SO THEY LOOK AT ME, THEY'RE LIKE,
AND THEN MY OWN BROTHERS AND SISTERS,
LOOK AT ME LIKE, DUDE, WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?
AND, YOU KNOW, WHEN YOU'RE YOUNG,
YOU DEMAND RESPECT.
INSTEAD OF GIVING HONOR, YOU DEMAND RESPECT.
AND SO I WAS DEMANDING RESPECT.
AND AFTER ABOUT SIX MONTHS
ONE GUY COMES, AN OLDER GUY COMES IN
TO THIS YOUTH GROUP
AND HE'S LIKE, TIPSY, DRUNK.
AND HE STARTS INTERRUPTING ME
WHEN I'M TRYING TO PREACH.
AND MY ENGLISH, I'M IN AMERICA THREE YEARS.
I'M BARELY SPEAKING ENGLISH.
I'M TRYING TO PREACH IN ENGLISH
AND HE'S MAKING FUN OF ME WHEN I'M PREACHING.
IT WAS REALLY EMBARRASSING.
AND IT DIDN'T GO WELL FOR ME,
JUST THE WHOLE YOUTH MINISTRY THING.
MAN, I'M NOT READY,
THESE COUSINS, SOME OF THEM KNOW THE BIBLE
ACTUALLY MORE THAN ME.
SO THAT NIGHT I DECIDED
THAT I'M GONNA CALL MY PASTOR AND QUIT.
AND WE - MY MOM CAME TO PICK US UP,
SO I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE A CAR AT THE TIME.
AND WE GO TO THIS GROCERY STORE
AND I'M PREPARING A SPEECH
BECAUSE I DIDN'T HAVE A CELL PHONE,
WE HAD A LAND LINE PHONE.
I'M PREPARING A SPEECH TO CALL MY UNCLE
AND TO CONVINCE HIM THAT HE NEEDS TO FIND SOMEBODY
WHO'S JUST A LITTLE BIT MORE EQUIPPED, OLDER,
KIDS WILL RESPECT.
THAT'S JUST NOT ME.
AS I'M PREPARING THE SPEECH,
THE VOICE OF GOD COMES IN A VAN,
CHRYSLER RED VAN
IN FRONT OF THE WINCO GROCERY STORE,
AND I HEAR GOD SAY THIS TO ME.
HE SAYS, IF YOU DON'T QUIT,
YOU WILL PASTOR A CHURCH LIKE A GROCERY STORE.
HE SAYS, PEOPLE WILL COME FROM EVERYWHERE IN THE WORLD
HUNGRY, EMPTY, BROKEN, SICK, DEMONIZED,
AND THEY WILL WALK OUT,
AND I SEE THESE PEOPLE WALKING OUT WITH CARTS
FULL OF GROCERIES.
HE SAID THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN
TO THE CHURCH THAT YOU WILL PASTOR.
HE SAYS PEOPLE WILL COME FULL OF THE HOLY SPIRIT,
HEALING, ET CETERA.
AND ON THIS GROCERY STORE IT SAYS,
24 HOURS, THAT IT WILL BE OPEN 24 HOURS.
I SAW A PHARMACY.
AND I FELT AT 16, PEOPLE WILL BE HEALED THERE.
NOW I'M 16.
I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT MINISTRY.
BUT THIS WAS A VOICE OF GOD
AND I DO FEEL LIKE IT WAS A CALL OF GOD.
I NEVER MADE THE CALL TO MY PASTOR.
I STILL STRUGGLED FOR TEN YEARS
IN A YOUTH MINISTRY WITHOUT SEEING GROWTH.
BUT WHEN IT GOT HARD,
I WOULD GO BACK TO THE PARKING LOT.
I WOULD PARK THERE AND I'D SAY,
GOD, YOU PROMISED.
INTERESTING, RIGHT NOW, WE ARE BUILDING
A NEW BUILDING,
AND IT WILL LOOK VERY SIMILAR
TO THE ONE THAT I RECEIVED WHEN I WAS 16 IN THE VISION.
REBECCA: WOW.
VLADIMIR: TODAY PEOPLE DRIVE FROM EVERYWHERE
EVERY SUNDAY.
I MEAN PEOPLE FLY FROM DIFFERENT PARTS OF THE WORLD
FOR A NORMAL SUNDAY.
WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT EVEN CONFERENCE.
THEY COME IN.
PEOPLE RECEIVE HEALING.
PEOPLE RECEIVE DELIVERANCE.
ALMOST EVERY WEEK I GET EMAILS
OF PEOPLE GETTING ENCOUNTERS WITH GOD
AND GETTING BREAKTHROUGH.
WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT AT 16, WHEN I WANTED TO QUIT
AFTER SIX MONTHS OF NOT SEEING THE BREAKTHROUGH,
FIRST OF ALL, GOD DIDN'T TELL ME IN THAT PARKING LOT
THAT IT WOULD BE THE NEXT TEN YEARS
AND I'M NOT GONNA SEE ANY BREAKTHROUGH.
REBECCA: THAT'S A LONG TIME.
VLADIMIR: BUT I FEEL THAT THE LORD HAD TO PREPARE ME
FOR WHAT HE HAD COMING.
REBECCA: AND I THINK THAT'S SUCH AN ENCOURAGING WORD
WHERE HE WAS LIKE,
YOU CAN'T GIVE UP IF YOU DON'T QUIT.
AND I THINK SO MANY PEOPLE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PROCESS,
AND I GET IT, BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE
I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PROCESS,
AND I HAVE WANTED TO QUIT.
AND I HAVEN'T, THANK GOD.
AND, YOU KNOW, HE RENEWS US.
HE GIVES US NEW STRENGTH AND VISION
TO KEEP GOING.
BUT THAT TEN YEARS -
AND I FIND IT REALLY ENCOURAGING, YOU KNOW,
BECAUSE WHEN YOU'RE IN THE PROCESS YOU'RE LIKE,
AM I EVER GONNA GET...
AND WHAT'S SO INTERESTING IS,
WHO I WAS INTERVIEWING YESTERDAY, SHE SAID,
EVERY MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE,
SHE SAYS YOUR CALLING ISN'T A DESTINATION.
SHE SAYS EVERY MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE
IS TO MODEL JESUS TO THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU.
VLADIMIR: YES.
REBECCA: AND THAT ENCOURAGED ME.
BECAUSE IT'S LIKE, YES,
YOU HAVE VISION FOR THE FUTURE
AND YOU'RE WORKING TOWARDS THAT
AND THAT'S GOOD.
I MEAN, LITERALLY, GOD GAVE YOU A VISION.
BUT ALSO YOU CAN BE ENCOURAGED
THAT EVEN IN THIS SEASON WHERE YOU'RE LIKE,
THIS IS AWKWARD,
THERE'S A PURPOSE AND YOU CAN STILL BE OBEDIENT
AND STILL MAKE AN IMPACT,
AND STILL MODEL JESUS TO THOSE AROUND YOU.
VLADIMIR: AND NOT TO MAKE VISION OUR IDOL.
BECAUSE I ALMOST FEEL LIKE
I GOT SUPER PSYCHED ABOUT IT, SUPER PUMPED.
REBECCA: WELL, THAT'S A REALLY EXCITING VISION.
VLADIMIR: YEAH.
BUT THEN, YOU KNOW, BUT THEN GOD DOESN'T TELL YOU
IN THAT SMALL PRINT HOW LONG IT'S GONNA TAKE.
IT'S LIKE JOSEPH.
HE GIVES HIM THAT DREAM, IT'S LIKE AN APPETIZER,
IT'S LIKE A TEASER.
I MEAN, THE POOR GUY, GOT SUPER EXCITED.
YOU KNOW, HIS DAD GIVES HIM A COLORFUL COAT
AND HE SEES LIKE, OKAY, GREAT.
I COULD SEE LOGICALLY
HOW THIS IS GONNA KEEP GROWING.
AND I'M GONNA END UP OVER THERE.
AND THERE IS LIKE THIS BUNCH OF DETOURS.
AND THE BIBLE DOES SAY THAT THE WILL OF GOD
IS YOUR SANCTIFICATION.
AND I ALWAYS FELT, REBECCA,
THAT NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS IN MY LIFE,
IF I STAY ON GOD'S HIGHWAY OF HOLINESS,
I WILL NEVER MISS GOD'S PURPOSE.
AND IF I DON'T TAKE THE COUNTRY ROADS OF COMPROMISE,
THESE EXITS OF DETOURS,
AND THESE QUICK THINGS -
REBECCA: QUICK SUCCESS.
VLADIMIR: YEAH, QUICK SUCCESS OR SOME KIND OF
FORNICATING, FLIRTING WITH SIN,
FORNICATION AND ALL OF THESE THINGS.
THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED WITH JOSEPH.
HOW HE ENDS UP AT THAT PLACE
THAT GOD HAD FOR HIM,
IS THAT HE TOOK A LOT OF DETOURS,
BUT EVERY SINGLE PATH YOU SEE HE FEARED GOD,
HE CALLED WICKEDNESS FOR WHAT IT WAS, WICKEDNESS.
NOWADAYS, OUR GENERATION CALLS IT WEAKNESS.
PORN IS JUST WEAKNESS.
JOSEPH CALLS THAT SIN WICKEDNESS.
AND THEN HE FEARED GOD, HE STAYED OBEDIENT.
HE STAYED FRUITFUL IN THAT SEASON THAT HE WAS IN.
AND THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW,
GOD BROUGHT HIM TO A DIFFERENT SEASON.
BUT I THINK AFTER AWHILE,
WHEN YOU GO THROUGH ENOUGH OF SUFFERING,
GOD DETACHES OUR FASCINATION
WITH THE SEASON THAT WE ARE IN.
AND WE NO LONGER STAY ATTACHED TO OUR SEASON.
GOOD ONES OR BAD ONES.
AND WE DEVELOP THIS ATTACHMENT TO HIM.
REBECCA: TO HIM. THAT'S SO GOOD.
AND WHAT JOSEPH HAD TO REALIZE
WAS HE COULD NOT MAKE A WAY FOR HIMSELF.
THAT WAS A LESSON THAT HE HAD TO KEEP LEARNING
BECAUSE HE WAS IN THE PRISON.
HE WAS LIKE, DON'T FORGET ABOUT ME.
AND HE HAD TO LEARN LIKE, NO, GOD IS GONNA DO THIS
AND HE'S GONNA BRING IT ABOUT.
AND WHEN JOSEPH FINALLY SURRENDERED
AND HE THOUGHT ALL HOPE WAS LOST,
THEY CALL HIM AND I MEAN IMMEDIATELY SHOT UP
FROM THE PRISON TO THE PALACE.
WHAT DO YOU FEEL LIKE WERE SOME OF THE THINGS
GOD DID IN THAT TEN YEARS?
VLADIMIR: WELL, HE DEFINITELY,
HE BROKE MY PASSION
AND MY DESIRE TO BE SUCCESSFUL.
I FEEL LIKE I KIND OF MADE IT INTO AN IDOL ALMOST,
AND SO HE DEFINITELY BROKE IT.
SECONDLY, HE DEVELOPED A GREATER HONOR
IN MY HEART TOWARD MY PASTOR,
TOWARD MY PARENTS,
TOWARD PEOPLE IN AUTHORITY.
HE DEVELOPED WITHIN ME
ALSO A GREATER PERSISTENCE AND PERSEVERANCE
AND QUALITY TO ENDURE.
BECAUSE NOW THAT I SEE A GREATER AMOUNT OF SUCCESS,
INFLUENCE, BLESSINGS, EVEN MIRACLES,
I STILL NEED AN ENDURANCE TO, FOR EXAMPLE,
TO BE ABLE TO SAY NO,
AND KNOW THAT PEOPLE ARE NOT GONNA LIKE IT.
TO BE ABLE TO CONTINUE TO PRESS IN
WHEN THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO LIVE
BY PRODUCING VIDEOS EVERY DAY
TO TRY TO DESTROY MY REPUTATION
OR DESTROY MY NAME
OR TAKE THINGS THAT I SAID OUT OF CONTEXT.
AND THE CRITICISM THAT COMES WITH IT.
I DIDN'T REALIZE HOW MANY PEOPLE WILL NOT BE HAPPY
THAT PEOPLE GET DELIVERED.
HOW MUCH PEOPLE WILL NOT BE HAPPY
THAT PEOPLE ARE GETTING TOUCHED.
AND THAT COULD STING.
THAT COULD HURT.
BUT THE LORD WAS TEACHING ME,
HEY, I'M TAKING YOU THROUGH THIS RIGHT NOW.
I'M DEVELOPING A STRONGER SPINE,
IF I COULD SAY.
I'M DEVELOPING THAT PERSISTENCE,
PERSEVERANCE, NOT TO BE MOODY,
NOT TO BE DEPENDENT ON YOUR FEELINGS,
WHO COMES, WHO DOESN'T COME.
AND ALSO TO LOVE THOSE PEOPLE THAT GOD ENTRUSTED ME,
INSTEAD OF ALWAYS ONLY LOVING PEOPLE
WHO ARE NOT HERE YET.
AND SO THERE WAS A LOT OF THOSE LESSONS
THAT WERE VERY IMPORTANT.
BUT ULTIMATELY, THE STATEMENT THAT I LIKE TO USE
IS THAT SLOW SUCCESS GROWS OUR CHARACTER.
AND QUICK SUCCESS, IT GROWS OUR EGO.
REBECCA: YEAH.
IT'S LIKE AS YOU WERE TALKING,
I JUST THOUGHT OF LIKE, A SHOOTING STAR.
IT'S LIKE IF YOU JUST HAVE ALL THE SUCCESS,
THE SIGNS, THE WONDERS, ALL THESE THINGS,
YOU CAN JUST -
IT'S BRIGHT AND IT'S VIVID,
BUT YOU JUST BURN OUT QUICKLY.
IT CONSUMES YOU.
VLADIMIR: UH-HUH.
REBECCA: AND SO GOD HAD TO PREPARE YOU
AND FORTIFY YOU FOR WHAT WAS TO COME.
SO YOU GO THROUGH THIS TEN-YEAR PROCESS -
BEFORE WE GET INTO THAT,
I DO WANT YOU TO SPEAK A LITTLE BIT ON HONOR
BECAUSE I THINK THAT'S REALLY IMPORTANT
FOR PEOPLE IN OUR GENERATION AND YOUNGER,
BECAUSE WE'RE GOING TO BE IN THAT POSITION
WHERE WE'RE GOING TO BE UNDER SOMEONE.
AND IT'S EASY TO BE LIKE HONORING
WHEN YOU LOVE THEM AND, YOU KNOW, EVERYTHING IS GREAT,
BUT THERE'S GONNA COME A TIME
WHERE THE PEOPLE OVER YOU,
YOU'RE NOT GOING TO AGREE WITH WHAT THEY'RE DOING.
SO HOW DO YOU HONOR THE LEADERSHIP ABOVE YOU?
VLADIMIR: IT STARTED FOR ME IN MY PARENTS HOUSE
WHEN I LIVED WITH THEM
AND I WAS ALREADY A YOUTH PASTOR.
REBECCA: THAT MUST HAVE BEEN INTERESTING.
VLADIMIR: IN THIS PARTICULAR INSTANCE,
MY DAD AND MOM WERE VERY CONSERVATIVE,
SO THEY HAD A PARTICULAR DRESS CODE
THAT THEY EXPECTED ME TO WEAR ON SUNDAY,
WHICH WAS FINE.
THE YOUTH SERVICE PART,
THIS IS WHERE THE PROBLEM WAS.
BECAUSE I WANTED TO DRESS UP LIKE, YOU KNOW,
VERY CASUAL.
AND ONE PARTICULAR TIME, I THINK I WAS 17,
I STILL LIVED WITH MY PARENTS.
I THINK I WAS JUST OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL
OR ABOUT TO GRADUATE.
AND I DRESSED UP IN THESE PANTS
THAT I WOULD GO AND WORK OUT WITH,
AND I FELT LIKE THIS WOULD BE REALLY COOL TO GO,
PLUS, THEY WERE COMFORTABLE.
REBECCA: AND THAT'S WHAT YOUTH PASTORS WEAR.
VLADIMIR: YEAH.
PLUS, THAT'S WHAT YOUTH PASTORS WEAR.
AND SO I'M ABOUT TO GET OUT WITH MY BIBLE
AND MY DAD IS LIKE, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
I'M LIKE, WELL, I'M GOING TO CHURCH,
IT'S THURSDAY NIGHT,
I'M THE YOUTH PASTOR.
AND HE SAID, NOT IN THOSE PANTS.
AND I SAID, YES, DAD,
IN THOSE PANTS I'M GOING TO GO.
AND I'M LITERALLY, PRETTY MUCH SHUTTING MY DAD OFF.
SO I GOT INTO MY CAR
AND RIGHT BEFORE I PUT THE KEY INTO THE IGNITION,
I HEAR THE HOLY SPIRIT SAY,
HE SAID I'M GOING TO LEAVE YOU
AND YOU'RE GONNA GO BY YOURSELF.
NOT IN THE SENSE THAT HE WILL LEAVE HIS PRESENCE,
BUT HIS ANOINTING,
AND YOU'RE GONNA GO BY YOURSELF.
AND I SAID, WHY?
HE SAID YOU JUST DISRESPECTED YOUR FATHER.
AND I SAID, WELL, MY DAD IS RELIGIOUS.
IT'S A SPIRIT OF RELIGION THAT'S UPON HIM.
I WAS LIKE, MY DAD DISRESPECTED YOU, LORD,
BECAUSE YOUR WORD SAYS YOU DON'T LOOK AT THE BODY,
YOU LOOK AT THE HEART.
YOU DON'T LOOK AT THE CLOTHES.
AND I FELT LIKE THE HOLY SPIRIT PROMPTED ME BACK,
AND HE SAYS, I ALSO SAID,
HONOR YOUR FATHER AND YOUR MOTHER.
REBECCA: YEAH.
VLADIMIR: AND THEN THE MOST PAINFUL THING
I FELT LIKE I HAD TO DO
IS TO GO BACK INTO THE HOUSE
AND CHANGE TO SOMETHING THAT MY PARENTS
WOULD BE MORE APPROVING OF.
MY PARENTS WERE NOT UNREASONABLE,
SO WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT SOME TOXIC UNREASONABLE.
AND IT WAS THE MOST PAINFUL THING,
SEEING MY DAD ON THE COUCH,
AND SEEING HIS PRODIGAL SON COMING BACK TO THE HOUSE.
AND MY DAD HAD THIS,
YOU KNOW, LIKE THIS SCORNFUL, PROUD,
LIKE HE CONQUERED ME OR SOMETHING.
LIKE HE, LIKE I'M A PREY OR SOMETHING.
LIKE, DAD JUST HURT ME.
SO I'M WALKING IN AND MY DAD,
INSTEAD OF EMBRACING ME LIKE A PRODIGAL SON,
MY DAD IS LIKE, THAT'S RIGHT,
IT'S ABOUT TIME YOU GUYS LEARNED THE RULES
IN GOD'S HOUSE AND STOP DISRESPECTING.
AND HE KEEPS SAYING THESE THINGS.
AND I'M LITERALLY LIKE, GOD,
HELP ME NOT TO SAY ANYTHING STUPID RIGHT NOW.
REBECCA: YEAH.
VLADIMIR: AND I CHANGED, I WENT BACK,
AND THEN HONESTLY, LIKE THAT DAY WAS
A POWERFUL YOUTH SERVICE.
AND I STARTED TO LEARN THAT
CONCERNING THE NONESSENTIALS,
REALLY, IF I'M UNDER THEIR ROOF,
TO HONOR AND OBEY MY PARENTS.
WHEN I MOVED OUT OF THEIR HOUSE,
TO STILL HONOR THEM.
HONOR IS THE ATTITUDE, OBEDIENCE IS THE ACTION.
AND THEN WHEN I STARTED TO -
MY PASTOR WOULD LEAD ME.
WHEN I BECAME A LEAD PASTOR AT 30,
SO I WANTED TO PAY OFF THE BUILDING
WITHIN THE FIRST MONTH OF OUR FASTING.
BECAUSE I WAS INSPIRED BY ROBERT MORRIS,
PASTOR ROBERT MORRIS.
REBECCA: YEAH.
VLADIMIR: SO I HAD THIS IDEA.
I'M GONNA HAVE ALL THE SMALL GROUP LEADERS
READTHE BLESSED LIFE BOOK.
AND THEN AT THE END OF THE MONTH,
WE WILL DO A FUNDRAISING CAMPAIGN.
WE ONLY HAD LIKE $200,000 TO PAY OFF.
I'M LIKE, WE WILL PAY IT OFF.
PLUS, I'VE BEEN ALREADY DOING A LOT OF SACRIFICES,
AS A YOUNG PASTOR THROUGHOUT THE MINISTRY.
SO I'M LIKE, I'M GONNA DO A SACRIFICE.
SO EVERYBODY'S ONBOARD.
ALL THE LEADERS ARE ONBOARD.
THE WHOLE PASTORAL TEAM IS ONBOARD.
AND I'M LETTING MY PASTOR KNOW
THAT THAT'S WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO.
I'M THINKING, WHO WILL BE AGAINST THAT?
AND MY PASTOR SAID, DUMB IDEA.
HE SAYS, WE SHOULDN'T DO THAT.
HE SAID WE DON'T NEED TO PAY OFF OUR BUILDING,
OUR MORTGAGE IS VERY SMALL.
WE SHOULD INVEST THAT MONEY INTO THIS AND THIS
BECAUSE THIS IS MORE IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW
WITH WHAT'S HAPPENING IN THE WORLD.
I REMEMBER, I WAS SO FRUSTRATED.
I'M LIKE, HE DOESN'T HEAR GOD.
AND HE JUST ASKED ME TO BE A LEAD PASTOR,
AND HE DOESN'T EVEN TRUST ME.
THIS IS SO WRONG.
AND I MEAN, I HAD THREE DAYS,
JUST INWARD, OF COURSE,
SMART ENOUGH NOT TO VOCALIZE THAT,
I WAS JUST LIKE, YEAH, OKAY.
LET ME HEAR YOUR ARGUMENT.
AND I WENT TO THE LORD AND I REALLY ASKED GOD,
I'M LIKE, LORD, I FELT LIKE THIS IS FROM YOU.
AND I HUMBLED MYSELF, I SUBMITTED MYSELF,
AND I REALIZED HE DOESN'T TRUST ME YET.
AND INSTEAD OF THIS BEING AN OFFENSE,
TO REALIZE, OKAY, THAT MEANS I NEED TO KEEP ON
DEVELOPING THE TRUST AND KEEP DEVELOPING THE FRUIT.
TWO YEARS LATER, WE DID THAT VERY THING
WITH HIS BLESSING.
THE WHOLE THING WAS PAID OFF.
AND NOW IT CAME TO A POINT
WHERE MY PASTOR STARTED TO TRUST ME.
NOT JUST PUT ME IN THE POSITION
BUT STARTED TO TRUST ME.
AND WE DEVELOPED EVEN THAT FRIENDSHIP.
NO LONGER JUST A MENTOR AND MENTEE.
AND SO I HAD TO GO THROUGH THAT
EVEN AS A LEAD PASTOR,
TO KIND OF STILL DEVELOP THAT HONOR
AND TO STAY HUMBLE.
AND I THINK IT'S VERY IMPORTANT FOR EVERY LEADER
TO HAVE SOMEONE IN THEIR LIFE
WHO IS NOT SCARED OF THEIR SUCCESS.
REBECCA: YEAH.
VLADIMIR: WHO CAN TELL THEM STRAIGHT, WITH LOVE,
SEASONED WITH GRACE,
BUT COMPLETELY NOT INTIMIDATED
AND IS NOT GONNA SUGAR COAT IT.
WE'LL SEASON IT WITH SALT,
BUT NOT SUGARCOAT IT.
TELL THEM, ESPECIALLY, WHEN THE YOUNG LEADER
STARTS TO RISE,
WE NEED THAT PERSON, OTHERWISE WE CAN FALL INTO
THE SIN OF SATAN, OF PRIDE.
REBECCA: THE SCARIEST PLACE YOU COULD BE
IS OUTSIDE THE COVERING.
AND THAT'S THE PURPOSE OF LEADERSHIP AND AUTHORITY
AND SOMEONE BEING OVER YOUR LIFE.
AND IT'S NOT A GOOD THING
TO BE OUT IN MINISTRY AND LEADING A MINISTRY
AND NOT HAVE ANY KIND OF COVERING,
BECAUSE YOU'RE EXPOSED.
VLADIMIR: YEAH, I BELIEVE.
REBECCA: YOU HAD AN ENCOUNTER WITH THE LORD
WHERE YOU WERE STRUGGLING WITH HONORING YOUR UNCLE
AND YOU SAID THAT HE GAVE YOU THIS REVELATION
ABOUT ACTUALLY THE DEVIL AND HEAVEN.
CAN YOU TELL THAT STORY?
VLADIMIR: YEAH.
SO A LITTLE BIT EARLIER BEFORE THAT,
I WAS STILL A YOUTH PASTOR
AND I WAS TRAVELING.
I ALREADY STARTED TO SEE MORE MANIFESTATION
OF HEALINGS AND DELIVERANCES IN THE MINISTRY,
SPECIFICALLY WHEN I WOULD TRAVEL.
I DIDN'T SEE A LOT OF THAT AT THE CHURCH YET,
BUT WHEN I WAS TRAVELING.
THIS ONE PARTICULAR TIME I WAS MINISTERING
AND THE LORD MOVED POWERFULLY THAT NIGHT.
PEOPLE WERE HEALED.
IN FACT, THE MOMENT I STEPPED AWAY FROM THE SERVICE,
MY PASTOR CALLED ME.
AND SOME AMAZING HEALINGS HAPPENED.
I MEAN, BLEW ME AWAY.
SO I'M LIKE, LITERALLY ON A SPIRITUAL HIGH.
AND THEN MY PASTOR CALLS ME
AND HE ASKED SOMETHING ABOUT THE CHURCH,
AND THEN HE JUST STARTED TO GIVE ME
SOME OF THESE IDEAS,
AND I WAS LIKE, TOTALLY WRONG TIME.
AND JUST, I FELT SO IRRITATED,
AND FELT SO UPSET.
AGAIN, I SAID, THANK YOU, DA, DA, DA,
I'LL THINK ABOUT IT,
WE'LL PRAY ABOUT IT.
I HANG UP THE PHONE AND ON THE INSIDE
I JUST HAVE THIS FURY,
FURIOUS WITH HIM.
JUST ANGRY AT HIM.
AND AN IDEA, LIKE, MAN, HE DOESN'T RECOGNIZE
THE ANOINTING THAT I CARRY,
LIKE HE SHOULD HAVE REALIZED
I JUST WALKED OFF THE STAGE, PEOPLE GOT HEALED
AND PEOPLE ARE LIKE, VLAD, AWESOME JOB,
GOD IS USING YOU,
AND HERE'S PASTOR JUST GRILLING ME ABOUT STUFF.
AND IT HURT ME TO THE POINT WHERE
I STARTED TO EVEN ENTERTAIN THAT NIGHT,
MAYBE I JUST NEED A DIFFERENT PASTOR
AND DIFFERENT COVERING
WHO CAN KIND OF KEEP SEEING THE POTENTIAL,
NOT KEEP SEEING MY PROBLEMS.
SOMEBODY WHO CAN CALL THE KING IN ME,
NOT THE KID IN ME.
LIKE ALL OF THESE LITTLE THINGS THAT I HAD
THAT WERE NOT FROM GOD.
AND I FELT THE HOLY SPIRIT PRETTY MUCH REBUKE ME
AT THAT POINT.
AND HE SAID WHAT'S HAPPENING IN YOUR HEART,
HE SAYS YOUR HEART IS GETTING SICK
AND IT'S BEING SICK WITH THE SAME SIN
THAT OCCUPIED SATAN.
SATAN WAS A GLORIOUS ARCHANGEL
AND HE BELIEVED IN HIS OWN PRAISE,
AND HE STARTED TO TAKE THAT IN,
AND STARTED TO THINK THAT HE'S BETTER THAN.
AND HE STARTED TO ATTEMPT FOR THE GLORY OF GOD.
AND HE SAID, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT'S HAPPENING
TO YOUR HEART.
HE SAYS YOUR GREATEST DANGER,
YOU'RE FACING THAT RIGHT NOW.
IT'S NOT WHAT YOU WERE FACING AS A TEENAGER,
BULLYING AND EVERYTHING, IT'S THIS.
THE BULLYING WAS EASY TO OVERCOME
BECAUSE IT PUSHED YOU TO YOUR KNEES.
THIS IS HARDER BECAUSE IT'S PULLING YOU
FROM YOUR GROUND
AND YOU'RE GONNA FLY OUT
INTO SOME UNKNOWN SPACE.
AND I REALLY - IT SCARED ME.
I GOT ON MY KNEES RIGHT THERE AND I SAID,
GOD, I DON'T WANT TO BE THAT PERSON.
BECAUSE I KNOW THAT PRIDE IS AN OPEN DOOR.
DESTRUCTION COMES AFTER PRIDE.
PRIDE OPENS THE DOOR TO DESTRUCTION.
IN ONE SHAPE AND FORM,
ONE WAY OR THE OTHER WAY,
PRIDE IS GONNA OPEN THAT.
AND I SAID, LORD, I DO NOT WANT THAT.
COULD YOU HELP ME?
IN MY MIND, I'M GONNA CALL MY UNCLE
AND I'M JUST GONNA APOLOGIZE
FOR WHAT I FELT, EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN'T
GET THAT THROUGH THE PHONE.
BUT I FELT THAT I NEED TO PUT IT OUT.
I NEED TO EXPOSE THE UGLINESS ON MY HEART.
I NEED TO EMBARRASS THAT.
I KNOW IT'S GONNA BE PAINFUL.
AND I FELT THE LORD SAY,
I WANT YOU TO GO DEEPER.
AND I SAID, WHAT ELSE COULD BE DEEPER?
AND HE SAYS, I WANT YOU TO TAKE A PORTION
OF YOUR RESOURCES EVERY MONTH
AND I WANT YOU TO BLESS YOUR PASTOR.
AND I WAS LIKE,
WELL, I DON'T DO THAT KIND OF STUFF.
YOU KNOW, THIS IS NOT -
YOU KNOW, SO YOU WANT TO GROW KIND OF STUFF.
HE'S LIKE, NO, NO, NO.
YOUR HEART NEEDS TO TURN TOWARDS YOUR PASTOR
BECAUSE IT'S TURNING AWAY FROM HIM.
HE SAYS, YOU'RE BEGINNING TO DESPISE HIM
AND YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS GONNA BE MORE FRACTURED
IF YOU CONTINUE TO DO THIS.
AND SO I FELT TO GIVE TOWARD,
TO BLESS HIM, TO HONOR HIM.
IT WASN'T TO BUY A RELATIONSHIP OR ANYTHING
OF THAT SORT,
BUT IT WAS REALLY TO EXPRESS MY HONOR
SO THAT MY HEART CAN STAY FOCUSED ON THAT.
AND I CONTINUE TO DO THAT.
AND I REALLY BELIEVE IN THE IMPORTANCE OF HONORING,
GIVING HONOR.
AND SOMETIMES THE BIBLE DOESN'T SAY
TO HONOR YOUR PARENTS
FOR EXAMPLE, BECAUSE THEY'RE HONORABLE,
OR HONORING.
I BELIEVE THAT HONOR SPEAKS MORE ABOUT
THE PERSON GIVING IT
THAN THE PERSON RECEIVING IT.
AS PEOPLE WOULD COME UP AND SOMETIMES,
I CAN'T HONOR MY PASTOR,
IF YOU WOULD KNOW WHO HE IS.
AND I UNDERSTAND THERE ARE TOXIC AUTHORITY,
THAT IS TRUE, THERE'S SOME AUTHORITY LIKE DAVID
HAD TO RUN FROM SAUL.
BUT DAVID NEVER DISRESPECTED SAUL.
REBECCA: YEAH.
VLADIMIR: HE DISTANCED HIMSELF FROM HIM.
REBECCA: AND HE REALLY COULD HAVE DISRESPECTED HIM.
VLADIMIR: HE COULD HAVE KILLED HIM.
REBECCA: YEAH.
VLADIMIR: BUT HE NEVER HAD THAT.
AND SO I THINK THAT THERE ARE TIMES
WHEN AUTHORITY IS EXTREMELY TOXIC MAYBE,
AND YOU CAN SEE THAT THEY'RE NOT DOING WELL
AND THEY'RE HURTING YOU,
YEAH, YOU'VE GOT TO DISTANCE YOURSELF.
BUT THE MOMENT, MAYBE EVEN GO AND FIND
A DIFFERENT CHURCH.
WE'RE NOT AGAINST THAT.
THE CHURCH IS NOT A COLOMBIAN CARTEL
WHERE YOU CANNOT GET OUT
WITHOUT GETTING SHOT, YOU KNOW.
BECAUSE SOME PASTORS ACT LIKE GANGSTERS.
THEY'RE LIKE, IF YOU GO,
I'M GONNA CURSE YOU AND STUFF.
THAT'S DEMONIC.
THAT'S WITCHCRAFT.
THAT'S NOT RIGHT.
BUT DISRESPECT IS THE ISSUE OF THE HEART.
AND I THINK THAT GIVING RESPECT,
SOME PEOPLE SAY WELL -
THEY SAY I CAN'T RESPECT THEM.
RESPECT IS GIVEN.
THEY HAVE TO EARN IT A HUNDRED PERCENT.
HONOR IS NOT EARNED.
IT'S GIVEN.
THAT MEANS YOU HONOR BASED ON THE FACT
YOU ARE AN HONORING PERSON,
NOT BASED ON THEM.
THEY OCCUPY THE POSITION
AND NOW YOU'RE HONORING THEM.
YOU GIVE THAT.
THEY HAVE TO EARN RESPECT.
AND YOU MAY BE A PERSON WHO DOESN'T GIVE THEM RESPECT,
BUT YOU NEVER SHOULD WITHHOLD HONOR.
BECAUSE ONCE YOU GIVE HONOR,
IT CHANGES YOU AS A PERSON.
IT VALIDATES YOU AS A PERSON
THAT WALKS UNDER THE SUBMISSION OF GOD.
AND ONE DAY WE WILL LIVE TO SEE PEOPLE HONORING US.
PEOPLE THAT WE WILL COVER.
REBECCA: YEAH.
AND YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW.
VLADIMIR: AND YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW.
REBECCA: AND THAT'S WHAT I ALWAYS THINK ABOUT,
HOW WOULD I WANT TO BE TREATED?
BECAUSE ONE DAY YOU'LL BE IN THAT POSITION
AS YOU GET OLDER.
AND SO IT'S LIKE YOU WANT TO BE HONORED.
AND SO, AND YOU'RE RIGHT, YOU DON'T HONOR PEOPLE
BECAUSE THEY DESERVE IT.
YOU HONOR THEM BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT
GOD'S WORD COMMANDS.
VLADIMIR: THAT'S RIGHT.
REBECCA: AND GOD WILL BLESS YOU FOR THAT.
VLADIMIR: THAT'S RIGHT.
REBECCA: AND HONOR IS THE WAY OF THE KINGDOM.
VLADIMIR: THAT'S RIGHT.
REBECCA: AND JESUS HONORED THOSE
WHO DID NOT NECESSARILY DESERVE HONOR
BUT THAT WAS WHO HE WAS
BECAUSE THAT IS THE WAY OF THE KINGDOM.
VLADIMIR: OR EVEN THE EARTHLY AUTHORITY,
HIS MOM AND DAD AT 12 YEARS OF AGE.
REBECCA: AND HE WAS THE SON OF GOD.
VLADIMIR: HE WAS GOD.
I MEAN, IMAGINE HIS PARENTS TELLING GOD
TO GO BACK TO THE HOUSE.
I MEAN HE COULD HAVE EVEN SAID,
EXCUSE ME?
I AM JEHOVAH, YOU KNOW.
AND JEHOVAH WENT TO BE WITH HIS PARENTS
AND OBEYED THEIR INSTRUCTION.
AND THEN JESUS IS DYING ON THE CROSS,
AND HE DOES WHAT THE OLDEST SON IS SUPPOSED TO DO,
WHICH IS TO HONOR.
BECAUSE THE JEWISH WAY,
TO HONOR YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER
IT'S NOT ONLY, HEY, AS A TEENAGER,
DON'T BE A SPOILED BRAT.
IT ALSO MEANS YOU'RE THEIR RETIREMENT.
MEANING YOU TAKE CARE OF THEM WHEN THEY'RE OLD.
SO JESUS IS ON THE CROSS.
HE KNOWS THAT HE'S GONNA DIE.
HIS MAMA, MOST LIKELY JOSEPH ALREADY PASSED AWAY,
SO MAMA IS STANDING THERE.
HE'S ARRANGING HOUSING FOR HIS MOM
WHILE DYING ON THE CROSS.
HE'S SUBMITTING TO THE WILL OF HIS HEAVENLY FATHER,
AND HE'S ALSO HONORING HIS MOM
BY PROVIDING, MAKING SURE SHE HAS A PLACE TO LIVE,
ASKING JOHN, CAN YOU TAKE MARY?
MARY, CAN YOU GO AND BE THERE,
SO THAT SHE CAN BE WELL TAKEN CARE OF.
SO JESUS IS A BEAUTIFUL EXAMPLE
OF HONORING AUTHORITY THAT GOD GIVES IN OUR LIFE.
REBECCA: THAT'S SO GOOD.
YOU HAVE A BOOK, HOST THE HOLY GHOST.
THIS JUST CAME OUT.
VLADIMIR: YES.
REBECCA: FOR THOSE WHO ARE INTERESTED IN GETTING IT,
WHERE CAN THEY GET IT?
VLADIMIR: SO IT'S AVAILABLE ON AMAZON.
IT'S AVAILABLE IN BARNES AND NOBLE AS WELL.
WE'RE PRETTY MUCH ANYWHERE ONLINE.
BUT AMAZON PROBABLY IS GONNA HAVE THE FASTEST SHIPPING.
IT'S ALSO AVAILABLE ON KINDLE AND AUDIBLE.
AND IN RUSSIAN, IN SPANISH, GERMAN,
VIETNAMESE, ROMANIAN, UKRAINIAN,
AND I THINK ABOUT FOUR OTHER LANGUAGES
ARE CURRENTLY BEING TRANSLATED.
REBECCA: WOW.
VLADIMIR: AND IT'S AVAILABLE FOR A FREE DOWNLOAD
ON HOSTTHEHOLYGHOST,
NO STRINGS ATTACHED,
SOMEBODY CAN GO IN AND DOWNLOAD IT.
THE ONLY THING I ASK IS
IF YOU DOWNLOAD IT FOR FREE,
YOU DON'T SELL IT, JUST GIVE IT FOR FREE.
REBECCA: THAT'S SO GOOD.
OKAY.
I WANT YOU TO TELL THE STORY,
THE STORY OF WHERE YOU BASICALLY HAD TO LEARN
THAT YOU NEEDED TO LEARN
WHO THE HOLY SPIRIT WAS AS A PERSON.
VLADIMIR: SO IT WAS AFTER I WAS ALREADY MARRIED
AND IN THE YOUTH MINISTRY,
I DIDN'T SEE THE RESULTS
THAT I KNEW THE LORD PROMISED FOR US.
AND I WAS HUNGRY FOR IT,
HUNGRY FOR REVIVAL.
REBECCA: HOW OLD WERE YOU AT THIS POINT?
VLADIMIR: SO THIS WAS ABOUT 26, 27.
SO ABOUT 11, 10, 11 YEARS ALREADY
BEING IN THE YOUTH MINISTRY.
AND I WOULD SAY MY DESPERATION REACHED ITS PEAK,
TO THE POINT WHERE I WANTED TO -
A LITTLE BACKGROUND.
WE WOULD GO FOR A YEAR WITHOUT SEEING SALVATIONS.
REBECCA: OH, WOW.
VLADIMIR: WE WOULD GO FOR TWO YEARS
WITHOUT WATER BAPTISMS.
I PREACHED AS HARD AS I PREACHED TODAY.
ACTUALLY I PREACHED HARDER DURING THAT TIME.
I USED ALL THE CREATIVE THINGS
AS A YOUTH PASTOR.
I BROUGHT A PIG TO THE SERVICE.
I BROUGHT A SHEEP TO THE SERVICE.
I CAME WITH A MOTORCYCLE.
I MEAN, I DID ALL KINDS OF CREATIVE THINGS.
FEAR FACTORS, COMMUNITY THINGS.
IT WASN'T THAT I WAS IDLY JUST DOING NOTHING
AND JUST HOPING FOR REVIVAL.
I DID EVERYTHING I COULD.
I FELT LIKE THERE WAS THIS SPIRITUAL RESISTANCE.
WE BROKE THE CURSES.
CURSED THOSE DEMONS.
SHUT DOWN THE JERICHO WALLS.
NAME IT, CLAIM IT.
WE DID ALL OF THE STUFF
AND I JUST COULD NOT GET THE BREAKTHROUGH.
ON MY WAY TO CALIFORNIA,
I HEAR A PODCAST.
AND MAYBE THE LORD WILL USE THIS PODCAST
FOR SOMEBODY ELSE.
I HEAR THE PODCAST OF A PASTOR
WHOSE NAME STARTS THE SAME WAY MY NAME STARTS
IN A DIFFERENT COUNTRY,
THE COUNTRY I COME FROM.
AND HE SHARES A STORY THAT HE HAD A SIMILAR THING,
HAD 150 PEOPLE, JUST A LITTLE BIT MORE PEOPLE
AND HE COULD NOT, COULDN'T HAVE A BREAKTHROUGH.
HIS MOM DIES, LEAVES HIM AN APARTMENT.
AND THEN HE SELLS THAT APARTMENT,
AND THIS WAS ABOUT 20 YEARS AGO, THAT STORY,
WHEN HE WAS TALKING -
WHEN HE WAS REFERRING TO THE STORY.
SO $10,000 IN UKRAINE 20 YEARS AGO
IS A LOT OF MONEY.
AND HE FELT INSTEAD OF
GETTING THAT APARTMENT FOR HIMSELF,
HE NEEDED TO SELL THAT APARTMENT
AND GIVE IT TO THE KINGDOM OF GOD.
NOT TO HIS MINISTRY, SOMEONE ELSE'S MINISTRY
AND ASK FOR SOMEBODY TO PRAY FOR HIM.
AND SO I'M HEARING THIS STORY AND I'M THINKING,
WOW, THAT'S REALLY COOL.
BUT IN THE BACK OF MY HEAD I'M LIKE,
MAN, THAT'S LIKE SOME,
SOW MONEY SO YOU CAN GET THE ANOINTING.
I'M LIKE, MAN, THIS KIND OF SOUNDS FISHY.
AND I HEAR, I HONESTLY FELT THE HOLY SPIRIT
PROMPTED ME
THAT I NEED TO DO THE SAME.
AND I HAD ABOUT $10,000 IN MY ACCOUNT.
UP TO THIS POINT,
I HAVE NEVER GIVEN ABOVE MY TITHE.
REBECCA: OH, WOW.
VLADIMIR: I WAS LEGALISTIC IN TITHING,
BUT I WAS NOT GENEROUS.
MY WIFE CALLED ME STINGY BECAUSE I WAS
ACTUALLY VERY STINGY.
I JUSTIFIED IT BY SAYING I WAS FRUGAL.
SO THE IDEA OF TAKING FOUR YEARS -
FOUR YEARS' SAVINGS -
REBECCA: THAT'S A LOT.
VLADIMIR: IT GAVE ME ALMOST A HEART ATTACK.
SO I RIGHT AWAY DISCARD IT AS THE DEMONIC VOICE,
STEALING, KILLING AND DESTRUCTION.
BECAUSE I'M THINKING THE DEVIL WANTS TO
STEAL MY SAVINGS, DESTROY MY FUTURE.
SO I RATIONALIZE IT AND I SAID,
GOD WILL NEVER ASK ME TO DO THAT.
IN HIS WORD HE SAYS,
IN THE HOUSE OF THE RIGHTEOUS,
THERE ARE STORED SILVER AND YOU HAVE TO SAVE.
SO I GET TO THIS CONFERENCE,
AND IT'S LIKE, GOD JUST -
EVERY SINGLE TIME I SPEAK IT,
IT JUST KEEPS COMING, KEEPS COMING.
IT GOT SO PAINFUL.
REBECCA: IT WAS LIKE IT WASN'T -
IT WAS LIKE, INCESSANT.
VLADIMIR: IT WOULDN'T LEAVE.
TO THE POINT THAT I'M THINKING,
THESE ARE LIKE INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS
AND THAT'S NOT EVEN NORMAL.
BUT I KNEW IN MY HEART THAT THIS WASN'T FROM ME,
AND I KNEW THE DEVIL WOULD NEVER HAVE ME GIVE.
I KNEW ENOUGH THEOLOGY TO KNOW
THAT THIS IS MOST LIKELY LEANING TOWARD
A DIRECTION I DO NOT WANT TO GO.
AND SO, BUT THESE WERE NOT JUST MY SAVINGS,
IT'S MY WIFE'S AS WELL.
SO I MADE THIS DEAL WITH THE LORD,
THAT IF I COME HOME AND I ASK MY WIFE,
AND SHE JUMPS AT IT RIGHT AWAY
WITHOUT PRAYING ABOUT IT,
THEN THIS IS FROM GOD.
IF SHE SAYS, WE NEED TO PRAY ABOUT IT
FOR A FEW DAYS,
THEN I HOPE I CAN TALK HER OUT OF IT.
BECAUSE I'M LIKE, THIS IS TOO RISKY.
THAT'S ALL MY MONEY.
I DON'T HAVE PROSPECTS.
I WAS GETTING PAID VERY LITTLE
AT THE CHURCH AS WELL.
AND THE CHURCH WASN'T GROWING.
I'M A YOUTH PASTOR
AND WE'RE IN A SMALLER TOWN.
AND I'M LIKE, I'M NOT GONNA THROW THIS AWAY.
I'VE DONE EVERYTHING.
NOTHING'S GONNA CHANGE.
PLUS, I RECEIVED IMPARTATION FROM OTHER PEOPLE.
LIKE I RATIONALIZED, THIS STUFF DOESN'T WORK.
WE FLY TO THIS COUNTRY.
WE TAKE THE RESOURCES.
REBECCA: WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
NO, NO, NO.
SO YOU'VE GOT YOU GO TO YOUR WIFE.
VLADIMIR: THAT'S RIGHT.
I GO TO MY WIFE,
AND I ALSO DON'T WANT TO COME IN AND SAY,
HEY, LET'S GIVE OUR SAVINGS AWAY.
SO I'M DOING THIS, LIKE WALKING AROUND
BEHIND THE BUSH
AND JUST SAYING ALL THESE THINGS.
LIKE, HEY, WHAT IF, YOU KNOW,
IT'S BEEN SOME TIME,
WHAT IF WE MAYBE ONE TIME TAKE JUST ONE YEAR
AND JUST DO SOMETHING RADICAL FOR GOD,
MAYBE LIKE IN THE FUTURE?
AND SHE'S NOTICING I'M NERVOUS
AND I'M TRYING TO SAY SOMETHING.
SHE'S LIKE, WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY?
AND I SAID, WELL, WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS THAT,
I WANT US TO TAKE OUR SAVINGS
AND I WANT US TO GO TO ANOTHER MINISTRY
AND COMPLETELY, ALL OF IT, GIVE IT AWAY.
AND FORGET ABOUT US HAVING A HOME THAT WE WANT.
AND I SAID, AND HOPE THAT GOD WILL BRING US
A BREAKTHROUGH IN THE MINISTRY
THAT WE'RE CALLED TO BE IN.
WE'RE NOT REAL ESTATE AGENTS, WE'RE PASTORS.
AND WE'RE NOT SEEING THE BREAKTHROUGH.
AND JUST PRETTY MUCH THROW OURSELVES
AND HOPE GOD WILL CATCH US.
SHE'S LIKE, DO YOU FEEL LIKE GOD IS TELLING YOU THAT?
AND I SAID, I'M NOT CERTAIN, BUT I THINK SO.
BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO THROW THIS GOD TOLD ME
BECAUSE THEN SHE WILL EVEN HAVE NO ABILITY
TO RESPOND BACK WITHOUT FEELING
SHE'S IGNORING GOD.
PLUS I WASN'T CERTAIN.
I WAS NOT SURE.
I WENT ON MAYBE.
AND WE TOOK THAT,
BUT MY DESPERATION AND HUNGER WAS SO GREAT
THAT I WAS WILLING TO DO WHAT IT TAKES.
AND WE FLEW THERE.
THIS PASTOR, HE PRAYED FOR ME
A MINUTE AND 25 SECOND PRAYER.
IT WAS NOT A LONG PRAYER.
I WAS LIKE, MAN, I FLEW FROM ANOTHER COUNTRY.
REBECCA: YOU'RE LIKE, I DID ALL OF THIS FOR THIS?
VLADIMIR: AND HE PRAYS FOR ME.
I HAVE IT RECORDED ON MY PHONE.
THEN HE GIVES ME JUST A VERY SIMPLE INSTRUCTION.
AND THAT REALLY OFFENDED ME.
REBECCA: DID YOU FEEL GOD'S PRESENCE
WHEN HE PRAYED FOR YOU?
VLADIMIR: NOPE.
REBECCA: SEE, THAT JUST SHOWS
YOU DON'T ALWAYS FEEL IT.
VLADIMIR: ABSOLUTELY.
AND I ACTUALLY DIDN'T SHAKE,
DIDN'T FEEL FIRE, NOTHING.
I MEAN, IT WAS -
IT WAS AT THE DINNER TABLE.
THEY BROUGHT ME IN AND I WAS LIKE,
MAN, THAT'S NOT HOW IMPARTATION
IS SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE.
I'M SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE, ON THE FLOOR THREE DAYS
UNDER THE POWER OF GOD.
I WAS LIKE, I'M DEFINITELY NOT RECEIVING ANYTHING.
REBECCA: AND SO YOU FELT OFFENDED FOR A MOMENT.
VLADIMIR: BECAUSE OF THE INSTRUCTION HE GAVE ME.
THE INSTRUCTION HE GAVE ME,
HE SAID, I WANT YOU, NUMBER ONE,
HE SAID, I WANT YOU TO GIVE A CALL FOR SALVATION
EVERY TIME YOU PREACH.
NUMBER TWO, PRAY FOR THE SICK EVERY TIME YOU PREACH.
AND NUMBER THREE, CHANGE YOUR PRAYER FROM,
GOD, GIVE ME POWER,
TO, LORD, I WANT TO KNOW THE HOLY SPIRIT.
AND SO I'M LIKE, OKAY, ALTAR CALL,
PRAYER FOR HEALING, NO PROBLEM.
I SAID THE LAST ONE, I WAS LIKE,
I KNOW THE HOLY SPIRIT.
I KNOW A LOT OF STUFF ABOUT THE HOLY SPIRIT.
AND HE SAYS, NO, YOU DON'T.
HE SAYS, THE SOURCE OF POWER IS NOT IN POWER.
IT'S IN THE PERSON.
AND THERE'S ONE PERSON GOD ENTRUSTED
AS THE MANAGER OF ALL HIS WEALTH.
AND THAT'S HIS HOLY SPIRIT.
HE SAID HE IS THE MANAGER
OF ALL THAT.
GOD THE FATHER MAKES THE SHOTS.
JESUS EXECUTES,
AND THE SPIRIT IS THE ONE THAT DISTRIBUTES
ALL OF THAT.
HE SAYS GET TO KNOW THE MANAGER.
HE'S HERE ON EARTH.
HE LIVES INSIDE OF YOU.
AND SO I KIND OF SWALLOWED THAT OFFENSE,
WENT BACK HOME AND I STARTED TO PRAY,
ASK THE LORD, READ BOOKS ON THE HOLY SPIRIT AS WELL.
AND THEN I STARTED TO TAKE ABOUT
FIVE TO TEN MINUTES EVERY DAY AFTER MY PRAYER
AND FELLOWSHIP WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT.
SO I WOULD TALK TO HIM.
I WOULD ADDRESS HIM AS A PERSON.
I WOULD VISUALIZE HIM BEING IN THE ROOM
SITTING ON THE CHAIR.
AND THAT JUST HELPED ME TEMPORARILY
TO SHIFT MY MIND FROM HE'S A POWER, FEELING,
ANOINTING, TINGLING,
OIL, ALL OF THAT, TO HE'S A PERSON.
AND I STARTED TO SENSE,
I WOULDN'T FEEL HIM,
BECAUSE YOU DON'T NECESSARILY FEEL THE PERSON,
YOU KNOW THE PERSON.
WE FEEL THE POWER.
BUT WE KNOW THE PERSON.
THAT'S WHY THE BIBLE SAYS BE STILL AND KNOW
THAT I'M GOD.
SO WE DON'T TECHNICALLY FEEL GOD,
WE FEEL HIS POWER.
BUT WE KNOW HIM AS A PERSON.
I STARTED TO GET TO KNOW HIM MORE.
HE BECAME VERY REAL TO ME.
AND SHORTLY AFTER THAT,
WE DECIDED REALLY GIVE ALL OUR SAVINGS EVERY MONTH
FOR THREE YEARS IN A ROW ACTUALLY.
SO WE DID THAT FOR ABOUT THREE YEARS.
AND WE STARTED TO GIVE OUR CARS AWAY.
BECAUSE I STARTED SEEING THE MOVEMENT
IN THE YOUTH GROUP.
PEOPLE START GETTING SAVED.
AND WHEN THAT HAPPENED,
I WAS WILLING TO GIVE ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING
JUST TO SEE PEOPLE -
I JUST WANTED TO SEE PEOPLE SAVED.
SO WHEN THAT HAPPENED, INTERESTINGLY,
IS THAT WITHIN THAT YEAR,
MY FATHER FINDS LAND CLOSE TO CHURCH.
NOW, I DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY.
AND NOT ONLY, I DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY,
I JUST MADE A PROMISE TO GIVE ALL MY SAVINGS
FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR ON TOP OF THAT.
SO MY DAD SAYS, I WANT YOU TO BUY THIS LAND
AND BUILD A HOUSE.
YOU WERE TRYING TO BUILD A HOUSE.
I SAID, DAD, I'M BROKE
AND I'M GONNA BE BROKE FOR THE NEXT THREE YEARS.
AND MY DAD BORROWS ME THE MONEY.
THE HOUSE GETS BUILT BY THE END OF THAT YEAR.
THERE'S ENOUGH MONEY IN THE CONSTRUCTION LOAN
TO PAY MY DAD BACK.
SO PRETTY MUCH BY THE END OF THAT YEAR,
WITHIN 12 MONTHS, I WAS IN THE NEW HOME
AND I HAD A NEW MINISTRY.
REBECCA: OH, MY GOODNESS.
VLADIMIR: AND WHEN THAT HAPPENED,
THAT'S WHEN WE GAVE TWO MORE CARS AWAY,
AND END UP WALKING TO WORK FOR A WHILE.
BECAUSE WHEN THAT HAPPENED,
NOW I WASN'T LED,
I'M LIKE, IF GOD IS THAT GOOD,
I'M GONNA THROW EVERYTHING.
I WAS LIKE, I DON'T NEED TO HAVE A CAR.
I CAN JUST BLESS SOMEBODY.
I SAW SOMEBODY IN THE CHURCH.
BOTH OF US FELT GOOD ABOUT IT.
GAVE THE CAR AWAY.
AND THE LORD REALLY STARTED TO STRETCH US
IN THE AREA OF GIVING.
AND REALLY STRETCH US IN THAT AREA
BECAUSE I REALLY FELT THAT
IT WAS DEEPLY CONNECTED TO MY HEART,
BECAUSE MONEY IS CONNECTED TO THE HEART.
AND SO WHEN WE BEGIN TO LAY IT DOWN,
WE BEGIN TO SENSE THE LORD MOVING,
ENRICHING US SPIRITUALLY,
AND I STARTED TO SEE THAT BREAKTHROUGH
AND THAT REVIVAL,
I LONGED FOR THAT SINCE 16 YEARS OF AGE.
AND I'M WILLING TO GIVE, YOU KNOW,
MY LIFE TO SEE THAT.
AND SO FINALLY I'M ABLE TO SEE THAT.
AND THAT JUST GAVE ME SO MUCH JOY.
AND THEN THE MIRACLES STARTED TO BREAK OUT.
FIRST IN THE YOUTH GROUP.
WHEN KIDS STARTED GETTING HEALED,
THEN DELIVERANCES.
LIKE THIS GUY ALEX COMES TO THE YOUTH GROUP
AND STARTS MANIFESTING DEMONS LIKE
IN THE YOUTH SERVICE.
LIKE A FULL-BLOWN, HA, I AM HITLER!
AND WE DON'T HIDE HIM IN THE ROOM.
I MEAN, IT'S A YOUTH SERVICE.
KIDS ARE -
LIKE THE WILD STUFF.
AND WE INTERROGATE THE DEMON
AND THE DEMONS SAID I ENTERED HIM.
THE KID GETS DELIVERED.
FINDS OUT HIS BROTHER DIES
AND WHEN HIS BROTHER DIED,
HE WENT TO A CEMETERY
AND STARTED TO DIG DIRT.
AND HE FELT SOMETHING ENTER HIM IN THE CEMETERY.
AND AFTER THAT, HE SAID HE BLACKS OUT.
AND SOMETHING HAPPENS TO HIS BODY HE'S NOT AWARE OF.
SO LIKE FOR EXAMPLE, HE TAKES A HAMMER
AND THROWS IT AT A PERSON.
AND HE COMES BACK TO HIMSELF,
HE'S LIKE, WHAT JUST HAPPENED?
SO THEY KICKED HIM OUT OF SCHOOL.
THEY PUT HIM IN JAIL.
LIKE THIS GUY WAS A BIG TROUBLEMAKER.
LOOKED GOOD ON THE OUTSIDE.
BUT HE JUST SNAPS FOR NO REASON.
WHEN THE DEMON WAS CAST OUT,
THAT NEVER HAPPENED AGAIN.
HE GOT MARRIED.
COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PERSON.
SO THESE THINGS STARTED TO HAPPEN IN THE YOUTH GROUP.
KIDS GETTING DELIVERED.
KIDS COMING GETTING WORSHIP.
I REMEMBER ONE KID COMING FOR ABOUT
TWO, THREE WEEKS,
STANDS DURING WORSHIP, BAM, FALLS.
WORSHIP ENDS.
AND THE DEMON STARTS MANIFESTING
DURING ANNOUNCEMENTS.
SO WE STOPPED THE ANNOUNCEMENTS.
WE DO THE DELIVERANCE
AND THEN HIS FAMILY COMES,
WHAT DID YOU GUYS DO TO HIM?
WE'RE LIKE, WHY?
THEY'RE LIKE, HE'S COMPLETELY DIFFERENT NOW.
SO THESE SUPERNATURAL THINGS,
IT'S ALMOST LIKE MIRACLES.
I WAS CHASING THEM AND NOW THEY STARTED TO FOLLOW US.
THEY STARTED TO FOLLOW ME.
THEY STARTED TO FOLLOW THE MINISTRY.
AND GOD REALLY STARTED TO ESTABLISH
THE LIVES OF YOUNG PEOPLE,
NOT ONLY ON THE PREACHING OF THE WORD,
BUT ON THE DEMONSTRATION OF HIS POWER.
AND THEN THE YOUTH GROUP OUTGREW THE CHURCH.
IT ACTUALLY QUADRUPLED THE SIZE OF THE CHURCH.
AND MY PASTOR ASKED ME TO STEP AWAY FROM THE YOUTH
AND TO FOCUS ON THE -
ON LEADING THE CHURCH.
SO THE LAST SEVEN YEARS, THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN DOING.
SO AS I CONTINUE TO GROW IN RELATIONSHIP
WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT,
I WOULD SHARE WITH DIFFERENT LEADERS
AND DIFFERENT PASTORS,
AND THEY WOULD ASK ME
WHEN I WOULD PREACH ON THE HOLY SPIRIT,
SO MANY PEOPLE HAVE THESE ENCOUNTERS
AND THEIR RELATIONSHIP WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT
WILL GO TO THE NEXT LEVEL.
I WROTE THIS BOOK TWO YEARS AGO.
I DIDN'T FEEL LIKE IT WAS THE RIGHT TIME
TO RELEASE IT, THOUGH.
AND I REALLY FELT THAT THIS WOULD BE A TIME NOW
TO WHAT THAT PODCAST DID TO ME,
TO DO THAT TO SOMEBODY ELSE,
TO HELP SOMEBODY ELSE DISCOVER THAT,
TO BEGIN TO WALK IN THE HOLY SPIRIT.
BUT I WOULD SAY THE FIRST THING
THAT REALLY STARTED TO CHANGE PERSONALLY
WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT
WAS THAT I BECAME A BETTER PERSON.
HOLY SPIRIT DIDN'T MAKE ME BETTER THAN SOMEONE.
HOLY SPIRIT MADE ME BETTER THAN ME.
THAT'S WHY THE CHRISTIAN CHARACTER
IS CALLED THE FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT.
IT'S NOT CALLED THE FRUIT OF DISCIPLINE.
TRYING HARDER, RITUALS OR ROUTINES.
I'M GONNA REALLY WORK ON MY MOUTH.
I'M GONNA REALLY WORK ON MY ATTITUDE.
MAN, I'M JUST NOT KIND.
I'M GONNA WORK ON MY KINDNESS.
I'M GONNA SIGN UP FOR THIS PROGRAM.
I'M NOT AGAINST PROGRAMS.
I'M NOT AGAINST THOSE THINGS.
BUT THE BIBLE SAYS IT'S THE FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT.
THAT MEANS HE HAS TO WORK ON IT,
WHICH MEANS THE WORK I'M LEFT WITH
IS TO ABIDE IN HIM.
AND AS I ABIDE IN HIM,
MY CHARACTER STARTED TO CHANGE.
WHAT IS THE CHRISTIAN CHARACTER?
IT'S THE FRUIT.
WHAT HAPPENS WITH THE FRUIT?
THE FRUIT IS NOT EATEN BY THE TREE.
IT'S EATEN BY EVERYONE ELSE EXCEPT THE TREE.
MY WIFE BECAME THE BENEFICIARY
OF THE WORK OF THE HOLY SPIRIT.
BECAUSE NOW SHE'S FED BY MY CHARACTER;
NOT FED UP BECAUSE I LACK CHARACTER.
BECAUSE WE CAN HAVE THE POWER
THROUGH THE HOLY SPIRIT.
BUT IF WE DON'T HAVE THE INTIMACY,
WE LACK THE FRUIT.
YOU KNOW, I HAVE AN APPLE, APPLE WATCH.
I CAN'T EAT THIS.
BUT I CAN EAT AN APPLE FRUIT.
I WEAR THIS.
THIS IS A TOOL.
THE FRUIT FEEDS THOSE NEAR IT.
AND FOR ME, THE GREATEST JOY I FOUND
IN MY LIFE IN INTIMACY WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT
IS THAT HE MADE ME KINDER,
HE MADE ME GENEROUS WITH MY WIFE.
HE MADE ME A PERSON THAT,
THE PERSON THAT MY WIFE MARRIED,
AND THE PERSON I AM TODAY -
ACCORDING TO HER, I'M NOT BLOWING MY OWN TRUMPET -
SHE SAID THESE ARE TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
AND I BELIEVE THAT IS NOT THE WORK
BECAUSE I TRIED HARDER.
BECAUSE THE FIRST TWO YEARS, I TRIED HARDER.
IT JUST GOT WORSE.
AND SO I ALWAYS TELL PEOPLE
THAT SOMETIMES YOU JUST NEED TO STOP TRYING COMPLETELY.
AND JUST PUT ALL OF THAT EFFORT IN RELATIONSHIP
WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT
AND LET HIM LEAD YOU,
AND YOU'LL BE SURPRISED WHEN HE WILL PRODUCE
A CHARACTER OUT OF YOU
YOU'LL NEVER TAKE CREDIT FOR.
THAT'S WHY IT WILL BE CALLED FRUIT OF HIM,
NOT YOURS.
AND PEOPLE WILL LOOK AT YOU,
NOT THE MINISTRY PART,
BUT CHILDREN AT HOME, SPOUSE,
EMPLOYEES AND OTHER PEOPLE,
SAY, MAN, THIS PERSON IS KIND.
THIS PERSON UNDER PRESSURE DOESN'T CRACK.
HE HAS SELF-CONTROL, HE HAS KINDNESS,
HE HAS MEEKNESS.
HE DOESN'T SNAP.
WHY?
NOT BECAUSE THEY'RE AMAZING.
IT'S BECAUSE THE SPIRIT PRODUCED THE FRUIT.
SO THAT'S WHAT INTIMACY WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT
PRODUCED WITHIN ME.
AND I LEAN ON THE HOLY SPIRIT
TO BE A PERSON THAT MY WIFE NEEDS,
MY CHURCH NEEDS,
MY STAFF NEEDS,
AND MY TEAM NEEDS.
REBECCA: THAT'S SO GOOD.
WELL, WE COULD KEEP GOING,
BUT WE'VE GOT TO LET YOU GO.
BUT I WANT TO SAY THANK YOU SO MUCH
FOR JUST IMPARTING THIS WISDOM
THE LORD HAS GIVEN YOU,
JUST TO KEEP GOING.
AND, GUYS, LIKE HE SAID, HIS BOOK IS OUT.
YOU CAN EVEN GET IT FREE.
VLADIMIR: THAT'S RIGHT.
REBECCA: I MEAN THAT'S -
I MEAN THAT'S GENEROUS AS WELL.
LIKE YOU SAID, YOU CAN GET IT ON AMAZON,
WHEREVER BOOKS ARE SOLD.
FOR PEOPLE WHO WANT TO GET CONNECTED TO YOU,
CONNECTED TO THE CHURCH,
HOW CAN THEY FIND YOU?
VLADIMIR: SO OUR CHURCH NAME IS HUNGRY GENERATION.
THE WEBSITE IS HUNGRYGEN.COM.
BUT PRETTY MUCH ON ALL THE SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORMS,
IT'S JUST HUNGRYGEN.
AND THEY CAN FIND THAT WE HAVE OUR SERVICES,
AS OF RIGHT NOW IT'S 9 AND 11:30.
IN JUST A LITTLE BIT FROM NOW
WE'RE GONNA BE ADDING A THIRD SERVICE.
AND THEN MY MINISTRY IS PASTORVLAD.ORG.
BUT ON THE SOCIAL MEDIA IT'S VLAD, HUNGRYGEN,
OR JUST TYPE PASTOR VLAD
AND USUALLY A FEW ACCOUNTS WILL SHOW UP.
PROBABLY THE ONE THAT HAS THE MOST FOLLOWING IS MINE.
REBECCA: THAT'S SO GOOD.
WELL, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE TODAY.
VLADIMIR: THANK YOU.
REBECCA: AND COME BACK, OKAY?
VLADIMIR: MY PLEASURE BEING HERE AND THANK YOU
SO MUCH FOR REACHING OUT.
AND YOU ACTUALLY MADE THAT POSSIBLE
FOR ME TO BE HERE.
IT WAS MY DREAM TO BE ON DAYSTAR.
REBECCA: REALLY?
VLADIMIR: YES, IT WAS.
AND IN FACT, YOU KNOW, QUITE A FEW OF MY FRIENDS
TOLD ME THAT, YOU KNOW,
BECAUSE THEY PUBLISH AND THEY'RE LIKE,
HEY, WE HAVE THIS OPPORTUNITY,
AND THEY'RE ON DAYSTAR AND STUFF,
AND SO IT WAS MY DESIRE.
AND SO WHEN YOU REACHED OUT, I WAS LIKE, OKAY,
THIS ACTUALLY MIGHT HAPPEN.
SO WHEN I WAS SITTING TODAY WITH YOUR MOM AND YOUR DAD,
I WAS LIKE, OH, MY GOODNESS, THIS IS CRAZY.
I'M NOT PUBLISHED BY ANYBODY,
I DON'T HAVE A PUBLICIST.
NOBODY DID THIS.
WHAT AM I DOING HERE?
THIS IS INCREDIBLE.
I'M VERY, VERY HONORED
AND I AM GRATEFUL.
REBECCA: THAT'S SO GOOD.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
IT'S BECAUSE GOD OPENED THAT DOOR FOR YOU.
VLADIMIR: HE DID.
REBECCA: THAT'S SO AMAZING.
WELL, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE.
VLADIMIR: THANK YOU.
REBECCA: AND THANK YOU FOR LISTENING
TO THE REBECCA WEISS PODCAST.